From: LIPS000000 Subject: Fwd: BUFFYFIC: unsubscribe buffyfic-digest Date: 01 Apr 1998 13:35:57 EST This is a multi-part message in MIME format. --part0_891455757_boundary Content-ID: <0_891455757@inet_out.mail.aol.com.1> Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII --part0_891455757_boundary Content-ID: <0_891455757@inet_out.mail.aol.com.2> Content-type: message/rfc822 Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit Content-disposition: inline Return-Path: Received: from relay29.mx.aol.com (relay29.mail.aol.com [172.31.109.29]) by air19.mail.aol.com (v40.16) with SMTP; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 23:47:09 -0500 Received: from lists.xmission.com (lists.xmission.com [198.60.22.7]) by relay29.mx.aol.com (8.8.5/8.8.5/AOL-4.0.0) with SMTP id XAA10546; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 23:46:54 -0500 (EST) Received: from domo by lists.xmission.com with local (Exim 1.82 #1) id 0yKFPf-0007Yv-00; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 21:46:11 -0700 Received: from (mail.xmission.com) [198.60.22.22] by lists.xmission.com with smtp (Exim 1.82 #1) id 0yKFPd-0007Yb-00; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 21:46:09 -0700 Received: from (imo21.mx.aol.com) [198.81.17.65] by mail.xmission.com with esmtp (Exim 1.82 #1) id 0yKFPZ-0003ZL-00; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 21:46:05 -0700 Received: from LIPS000000@aol.com by imo21.mx.aol.com (IMOv13.ems) id DLPPa05947 for ; Tue, 31 Mar 1998 23:45:00 -0500 (EST) Message-ID: <5c41718d.3521c64e@aol.com> X-Mailer: AOL 3.0 for Windows 95 sub 52 Sender: owner-buffyfic@lists.xmission.com Precedence: bulk Reply-To: buffyfic@xmission.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit unsubscribe buffyfic-digest -------------------- Return-path: Organization: AOL (http://www.aol.com) Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit unsubscribe buffyfic-digest --part0_891455757_boundary-- - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Anexsin Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Ties That Bind (9/10) Date: 01 Apr 1998 17:23:34 EST Title: The Ties That Bind (9/10) Author: Melinda Frango Email Addy: Anexsin@aol.com Rating: PG Spoiler: All episodes before Passion. Distribution: Ask first Feedback: Greatly appreciated. Disclaimer: Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, etc. Only the story is mine, and whatever characters never seen or mentioned on the show. Summary: Buffy and the gang get help from an unexpected source in restoring Angel's soul. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Caitlin remained silent for another long moment before speaking. Angel simply watched her, knowing full well what this conversation was going to be about. 'I know what you are going to say," he offered breaking the silence. "Oh, you do?" Caitlin asked slightly amused. "Yeah, you're going to tell me not to feel guilty, that it wasn't my fault, that it wasn't me." "Well, sort of. What I was really going to say was that she needs you," Cailtin informed him. "Who? Buffy?" he asked already knowing the answer. Caitlin nodded her head and continued. "She loves you," she said simply. "She deserves better, and I doubt she still loves me after everything I did to her," Angel explained sadly. "Angelus did those things, but she loves Angel. She doesn't want anyone else but you," Caitlin paused to take a deep breath. "She's that girl you always dreamed about meeting. Someone independent, strong, loving, don't give up on her so easily." Now Angel was staring at the ceiling. "I just need some time to deal with everything that has happened, and I don't know how long that will take." "You should've seen her face when I told her I was here to return your soul," Caitlin smiled slightly. "I've never seen a smile as big as hers. She wants to help you through this. To be there for you like you've been there for her," she explained. When Angel didn't respond or even glance at her, she spoke more firmly. "Look! I happen to know for a fact that none of them hate you. It's just hard for them to accept that a friend of theirs that was so nice and caring one day could turn into a evil, demonic creature the next. You and the demon are two different beings sharing the same body, you are not the same person!" "Fine believe what you want, but I'm the one feeling the pain and the guilt of his actions. He lurks right beneath my skin, and he's always there, reminding of what I am," Angel almost shouted. "Like I said before your soul is permanently housed in your body. It can't leave again, but the demon can. That's what I've been doing since that day you....well you know. I've been searching for a cure for vampirism, and I promise you that if it takes me 1000 years I'll find it, and you know I always keep my promises," Caitlin choked out. "Why do you want to waste your life looking for something that doesn't exist. If no one's found it by now, no one ever will," Angel said quietly. "I'm going to find it," she implied sternly. Angel's eyes glazed over and he drew her into hug. "I missed you so much," he whispered into her hair. "I missed you to. Oh, Xander says to tell you, that he doesn't hate you despite the window incident." Caitlin repeated. Angel looked at her skeptically for a moment, until realization dawned on him. Angel smiled and started laughing. "Xander doesn't hate me? That has got to be a first. I thought he'd be happy because he actually does have a reason to hate me now." "Now tell me something, if Xander does't hate you do you really think the rest of them do?" Caitlin asked. "I don't know. Like I said I need to deal with this in my own way. I don't want to put any of them in danger ever again, especially Buffy." "Think of it this way, Angelus is the evil twin, and Angel is the good twin. Blame the guilt on him, it was his fault after all," Caitlin smirked. "You never did cease to amaze me," Angel smiled. "Even when things are so horrible that laughter seems miles away, you can always make me laugh." "Stop, or you'll make me cry." Caitlin pretended to sob. "Now you have some explaining to do, sister dear. How did you come to be here, as in not dead." "Oh, boy. It's a good thing we have forever to live because this may just take that long." "Well like you said I have forever, let's hear it," Angel persisted while taking a comfortable seat on his couch, glad to have persuaded his sister from continuing their recent conversation. "But I do have something to do when your done," he added with a cryptic smile. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Buffy was sitting on her bed silently staring at her open math book, until the ringing of the telephone broke her out of her daze. "Hello," she greeted. "Hey, it's Willow. I just wanted to see how you were doing," Willow stated concerned. "I'm doing alright, I guess." "Has he showed up or called?" she asked. "No, I think he's avoiding me. You don't know how bad I want to go see him," Buffy answered. "I think I do," Willow smiled to herself. "I'm just glad he's back, and Angelus won't be back to terrorize us anytime soon," Buffy breathed a sigh of relief. "Believe me so am I." Willow hurriedly added. "Why don't you get some sleep, you sound like you could use it, and don't worry everything will turn out fine. It's just a feeling I have." "Thanks Will, you're a great friend. Goodnight," Buffy supressed a yawn. "Goodnight, Buffy. Sleep tight," Willow responded before placing the telephone back on its cradle. Buffy hung up the phone, and slipped into a pair pajamas. Before laying down in bed she opened her window and glanced out feeling as if someone was watching her. She smiled slightly and shook her head. "No, I'm daydreaming again," she whispered to herself. The past few weeks were finally taking their toll on her, exhaustion overcame her and she was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. Little did she know of the lone figure hiding in the shadows watching her bedroom window, waiting for the lights to go out. As soon as it did the figure climbed onto the roof and seated himself outside of her window. The figure stood vigil over her as she slept, and took comfort in the fact that she was alive and safe. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* End of part 9.......to be continued. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Clare H." Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Date: 01 Apr 1998 18:35:50 EST I can also relate. I'm on three (it used to be four) lists, I get a newsletter once a week, and I used to get three jokes a day, not to mention my e-mail crazy friends...(but of course I *love* all the attention!) Clare teddybartcbh@hotmail.com ----Original Message Follows---- Reply-To: buffyfic@xmission.com In a message dated 98-03-29 23:59:15 EST, you write: << Ingrid, I'd LOVE the challenge...but unfortunetly I'm already in the middle of Three Lists, 9 Fanfics plus stuff on the side...do you have any idea how much e-mail a day you get from 3 Lists? It's HELL, Hehehe. >> You know how much mail you get from 3 lists? Try 4 lists! Plus I'm on the FK War loop and 8 newsgroups. The amount of messages I read each night is incredible. Why do I read so many. Cause it's fun!!!!! Nastassia - ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Bernie Baguley" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Date: Thu, 2 Apr 1998 10:20:53 +1000 Date: 01 Apr 1998 17:23:37 -0700 unsubscribe - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: tabbylink@patrol.i-way.co.uk Subject: RE: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: FORMATTING GUIDELINES Date: 02 Apr 1998 01:41:43 --- On Tue, 31 Mar 1998 20:40:11 PST "Leslie S." wrote: >I am sure that I as well as most of the list subscribers ignores the >re-issuance of the list rules on its regular basis. But I wanted to >point out that #7 is really important!!! Yep, this is the one that'll mean I'll need heaps of help when it comes to posting my story. I'm gonna be begging more intelligent people to count lines for me! I'm real stupid when it comes to numbers. >It is very hard to read a story with irregular line breaks, so much so >that often times I will not finish a story. > >PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take a moment to check your format when sending >stories to the list. I am *so* relieved I'm not the only one with this problem. :) But even more than that I'm incredibly relieved that I haven't been suspended for forgetting to put DISCUSS in my headers . I promise I'll try to be a model citizen in future. :) Betzi - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: GothGirl77 Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: That Was The Day 2/2 Date: 01 Apr 1998 20:09:31 EST That was so funny! Xander in a bunny suit! Oh man, they have to do an April Fool's episode of Buffy. It would be hilarious! This would be perfect for it. Xander in a bunny suit, man, my face hurts from laughing. Nastassia - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Andrea Newbery" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Enough, (1/3) by Andrea Date: 01 Apr 1998 18:43:33 PST Title:Enough Author: Andrea Newbery e-mail: anewbery@hotmail.com Distribution: sure, as long as I know where. Rating: PG-13 Spoilers: everything up to KbD Summary: Definitly a Buffy/Angel story. A resolution to the events of Innocence though not exactly how I wanted it to go. Disclaimer: The characters of Angel, Buffy et al. are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB and whoever else… No copyright infringement intended. Please don’t sue me I’m already up to my neck in debt! Feedback: Please...good, bad, whatever! Kill him Buffy please. It ran through his head continually, a mantra of pain. He remembered it so clearly, the demon breaking through, his soul coming loose from his body. He knew in those few seconds how much of a mistake it had been to get close to her. The demon would hate her for that, for the love he felt for her. He expected to disappear then… to float without thought like he had the first time. Oh God, the first time, before he’d been summoned back and known in an instant the horror the demon had committed in his name. The crimes he was responsible for, crimes the demon had enjoyed committing. This time he hadn’t gone very far, still floated without form, had to watch the pain the demon inflicted on her. The words he said to her, the torture the demon put her and her friends through. These people, good people, who were now paying for his sins. Every harsh word she said about him, to him, gave him hope, but then… nothing. His body still walked, still tortured…still killed. The demon had killed Jenny. This pain was too new, too fresh, he didn't know how to deal with it. The only thing he understood was that she had to kill his body. He had thought that the first moments after the gypsy curse had been painful. They were nothing compared to this; this was his Buffy the demon was torturing. He did this… knew it, accepted that the blame was his, but he hadn’t known the cost of this love would be so high for her. It wasn’t right; he should be the only one to suffer. The love was fading from her eyes, but not quickly enough. Angelus… he… would destroy her before that happened. Now that the demon had killed Jenny, the deaths would only come quicker, giving her less time to recover, to overcome the guilt. If only he could help her, show her that it wasn’t him, that the body held no relation to the man she had loved. It had to be soon, the demon was working much quicker than he had thought he would. He should have done this sooner but he had held on to the hope she would find a way to get back, to re-curse him. That had died with Jenny. She had to kill the demon… soon. He thought about trying to appear in her dreams but she was already using him to explain things for herself. He needed to summon every last ounce of his strength, his will and most of all his love for her, to get his message through. A message through the watcher, the person she trusted most, given during the day, by the window. He knew it would be hard for Giles to see his face but he had no choice. A voice without form was to easily explained away. “Giles...” He formed a vision of himself, a hologram with no real substance. He hoped it would be enough. “Angel... it’s daytime... how?” He had to come in the day. To make sure they would now it was him and that he was separate; so Giles could believe it was he and not the demon who had killed his love. “She has to understand Giles, I’m not in that body, I’m already gone. He has to die, please Giles, he has to die.” His words came out in a rush tripping over each other in his hurry to make him understand before time ran out. He had to make him understand, so he could help her, so she could know it was okay. He wanted her to kill his body, needed her to kill it. The watcher had to convince her. It had to be enough. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Andrea Newbery" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Enough (2/3) by Andrea Date: 01 Apr 1998 18:45:25 PST Title:Enough Author: Andrea Newbery e-mail: anewbery@hotmail.com Distribution: sure, as long as I know where. Rating: PG-13 Spoilers: everything up to KbD Summary: Definitly a Buffy/Angel story. A resolution to the events of Innocence though not exactly how I wanted it to go. Disclaimer: The characters of Angel, Buffy et al. are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB and whoever else… No copyright infringement intended. Please don’t sue me I’m already up to my neck in debt! Feedback: Please...good, bad, whatever! He felt her first, the love, then the fear. “Get away from him” So cold, to feel hate from her. “Buffy, it’s…it’s our Angel, it’s daytime, it’s his soul.” She collapsed then… oh God what had he done? He only wanted to help and he couldn’t even touch her, he was just a vision, an apparition. He had no body to pull hers off the floor with. She was here now and maybe that was for the best. Since she had seen him, maybe he could convince her it had to be done, she had to let him go. Oh God, he would never touch her again, hold her again, the pain rocketed through his whole being as the enormity of what they had lost took hold. He missed her so much but there was no way back, to undo what had been done. He had to make her see, help her to forgive herself. She had to understand that all blame was his alone. “Angel” her voice…. “I’m here, I’m free now Buffy. I’m sorry, I didn’t want to leave you, I never want to leave you but he has to die. I have to die, please; he’ll only get worse. He wants to destroy you, kill everyone you know. Now that he’s started he’ll kill quicker, be more evil, please, kill him” “But…” “No, Buffy, there is no buts, no escape clause for us, remember how much I love you, how happy we were, that night. One hundred years of torture were worth it, for me, in that moment. Don’t blame yourself, it’s my fault; it always was. I had no right to be loved and I let you do it anyway and I’m sorry.” Was he getting through to her, he was weakening, only his love, his determination that she would not pay anymore for his sins held him there, visible. “ Let me carry the burden Buffy, you kill him. It’s not me, I’m gone and there is no way back… I couldn’t go back.” “But… Angel, I love you, if we could re-curse you, restore your soul, we could ….” “NO! Buffy, you’ve seen the demon, he has to be stopped. There is no time for anything else, he’s already killed Jenny, he’ll go after the rest of them soon, please….” “Angel…” She was weakening now, seeing the truth, coming to know as he had that hope for them was gone now, they would not be together again. His thoughts screamed at him, how could he have done this to her, what right did he have to love, but later, he would hate himself later. For now, he had to finish it, convince her, however he could. “Buffy, please I see everything he does, I feel what he feels, he is pure evil, but I’m tethered to him until my body is gone. I have to watch what he does, who he kills, what he says to you. It hurts me as much as it hurts you, I…” “O.K.” Thank you God, Thank you. “I will love you forever” He was fading now, his sense of relief so strong. “I’ll never forget you Angel, never forget how much I love you, I’ll always belong to you” “Buffy, you gave me love, acceptance and trust when I deserve nothing, you gave me hope in an existence of doom and now you are giving me freedom, I am yours.” “Angel, don’t go yet…” He was invisible to her now, and he waited to see if she could do it, if she understood… if he had killed her last ray of hope. He watched her, realizing it was the first time he had seen her in the sunlight, his soul ached for her, for the completeness she gave him. He knew and accepted that some crimes can never be forgiven. When his body died he would be dragged into hell along with the demon that inhabited his body. It would be enough for the moments of love, to see the love in her eyes, the faith in him, vampire, killer of his family. He deserved his fate, wanted it, to free her from the demon's torture and the fate that awaited her if his body lived. Whatever torture could be devised for him could never be worse than her suffering. She had loved him, saw the good in him, gave herself to him; the wonder of it still awed him. She would not pay anymore for the love she had given him. She smiled then and looked to where he had appeared. “I’ll do it” she whispered “I’ll free you from him because I love you to much to try to bring you back to pay for his crimes, to feel guilt for him.” Even now her only thoughts were of his pain, could he have been given a greater gift? “And when it’s over, my tour of duty as the slayer, when it ends as we all know it will, in the way we all know it will, you’d better be there waiting for me. I got gypped in this life but I’m going to get eternity with you. I still believe we are meant to be together” Oh Buffy, I wish…but I have to pay for my crimes. “I know you’re probably thinking that you’ll be going to hell, but why? You are you and the demon is the demon, you’re not him and you’ve suffered more than enough for a choice you made as a young man. I believe that we will be together again and that will get me through” With that she collapsed into the chair. He watched Giles comfort her and prayed to a God he had betrayed to keep her safe. She was quiet until just before dusk and then she got up grim-faced and turned to Giles, “Tonight Giles, I have to free him tonight, while I’m still strong enough to let him go.” Please God, give her the strength to kill him. Let this afternoon be enough to convince her that I can never go back, we can never go back. He felt the tugging start then like he was a kite being pulled in. The demon was waking. He couldn’t get very far from him when he was awake, was forced to watch his body kill, torture, another punishment for the choice he had made as a young man. Sometimes it felt so unfair, he hadn’t known what the consequences would be, this torture would never end for him. For Buffy, though, it could end tonight, she could stop paying for his crimes along side him. He waited in the factory hoping she would do it tonight. Angelus was alone with Spike and Spike was in no condition to help him. The demon would never expect her to go on the offensive, to seek him out, to come to his lair. He thought she was still held back by the memory of her Angel. “Angel” She stood in the doorway, a vision in white, sending him off with style. He watched as she fought him, completely focused on finishing it, on killing him. The demon had been caught off guard; he’d had no intention of killing her anytime soon. She fought well, clean, quick, no emotion. This was the last thing she could do for her love. He knew it as the demon felt the first stirring of fear, as his taunts of her had no effect. He smiled, so proud of her courage and sacrifice. She pushed the stake in finally, with little fanfare and watched as the body of the man she loved turn to dust. She was free... his punishment was no longer hers. The string was broken and for the first time in over 200 years his soul was completely free. With all his strength he reached out and touched her face, “I love you." She cried then, he watched as she released every hidden hope she had for a reprieve from fate or God or whoever. He waited as she calmed down and stood up, "I’ll see you again Angel, remember I love you”. She walked out of the factory, a vision in white, his angel, the only one he would ever see. He waited, for the demons to come and carry him off to hell, happy that his body, his voice wouldn’t torture her anymore. He followed her to her home, into her bedroom, still waiting to be taken away. He watched as she put the cross he gave her on, then the ring. She smiled, a sad smile for a lost love, but no longer full of guilt and pain. She spoke to him then; “We had something special Angel, something worth having. It will go on, someday, somewhere, we will be together again. I know this with all my soul. I may love again in this world, but my soul belongs to yours for all eternity”. He cried then his whole soul aching for what they had and what it had cost them, cost her. He cried for the love that burned so steadily in her eyes, the same love that seared itself onto his very being. He barely noticed as the room filled with a wonderful light. He slowly became aware of a presence, another spirit, full of goodness and hope. He watched as it approached him, taking the form of a man as it did. A vision of a perfectly good man, with such kindness shining through he could barely look. This vision was talking to him, without words, telling him it was okay. Telling him the guilt wasn’t his, it never had been, he had made a wrong choice as a young man but he didn’t have to pay for eternity. None of the cruel acts committed by the demon were his. Oh, if only it were true, and this vision was saying it was and that he had to go with him, it would all be okay now. He had to leave Buffy. He turned and saw her watching him, them, in awe. She smiled and sent him off freely with a love so pure it rolled into his soul like waves traveling through him, never leaving. He reached out to her and gained enough form to hold her close, smooth back her hair and kiss her good-bye. It was enough. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Andrea Newbery" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Enough, (3/3) by Andrea Date: 01 Apr 1998 18:47:35 PST Title:Enough Author: Andrea Newbery e-mail: anewbery@hotmail.com Distribution: sure, as long as I know where. Rating: PG-13 Spoilers: everything up to KbD Summary: Definitly a Buffy/Angel story. A resolution to the events of Innocence though not exactly how I wanted it to go. Disclaimer: The characters of Angel, Buffy et al. are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB and whoever else… No copyright infringement intended. Please don’t sue me I’m already up to my neck in debt! Feedback: Please...good, bad, whatever! She walked through the graveyard, sure-footed, secure in her abilities. In the five years since Angel she had become more committed to her destiny. Seeing it not only as ridding the world of evil but also of rescuing the souls of the bodies the demons had stolen. Freeing them as she knew Angel was free. She felt his presence close to her tonight, she always did when she was in real danger. He still tried to protect her, still gave his strength to her, so she could live, continue to fulfill her destiny. She talked to him often, telling him of her life. There was so much he had missed, Xander and Cordelia's wedding, Oz and Willow's new Computer Company. She told him of Giles and his new love, and how happy they were. She told him of her parents rediscovering one another. There was so much happiness in her life, so much love. She didn’t regret, couldn’t regret, loving him, even now, when she was alone, his presence still too large in her life to have room for anyone else. She was happy with her life, her friends, even her duty, but her soul wouldn’t be complete until she was with him again. It was her birthday tonight, twenty-two, the same age as Angel was when he died, was made a vampire. Five years since they joined together as one, it was all fitting somehow. It was over for her tonight, this life. She had accomplished a lot in the five years since she had lost him. Spike and Drusilla were long dead along with the majority of the vampires who had called Sunnydale home. She had killed countless other demons and even had two years of college under her belt. She hadn’t been afraid when Giles had read the prophecy that foretold her death on her twenty-second birthday. Since seeing Angel go into the light, for lack of a better description, she had known everything would be okay. If she died tonight Angel would be waiting for her, if she lived he would still wait. They had eternity to be together, she didn’t have to rush. She prepared though, told everyone what she needed to, finished writing up her version of the slayer diaries. She prayed for the strength to do her duty and then she proudly went to face her death. It came in the form of a group of the Master’s minions who had been planning this revenge for six years. She fought well, killed them all but the damage to her body was more than it could recover from. Giles, Willow and Xander all gathered around and said their final good-byes. Her Angel came then, a vision of himself surrounded by light and her soul lifted to stand beside him, ”Don’t be sad, please, I’m finally complete again. Rejoice in my life, our accomplishments, and the evil we erased from this earth. Remember our friendship and how much we love each other. I’m with Angel now, enjoy your lives, your loves as much as I enjoy the love I have." She turned to him then, reached out her hand and he folded her into him. Such love from him, it filled every inch of who she was, as her love had filled him. He smiled at her, a full smile with no guilt, no regrets, just joy and love. They all heard them laughing as their light faded away and disappeared. It floated lightly on the air surrounding them and they sat together and listened. It was enough. ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Answer this challenge, everybody! Date: 01 Apr 1998 20:49:11 -0500 To whom it may concern- Since Aurelia is busy with her many in-progress Buffyfics, I would like to present my challenge to anyone who feels up to it. Here goes... CHALLENGE: How 'bout some Angel/Willow fic? Sure, I know it's weird, but so was Spike/Willow. If a good writer gets hold of this, the impossible becomes a really cool story. I call it experimentation. -Ingrid: Author of many long Buffyfics (and some short ones). "Return to Normalcy," "One Vampire's Headache...," "This Fleeting Hope," "Ghost of a Chance," "Tragic Sighs" and "Footsteps." Oh! BTW, I've been working on my "ten years into the future" story, in case anyone was wondering. I'm working on the fourth part right now, but I want to get well into it before I start sending it to the list. Can you say 'pressure?' =) _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: Answer this challenge, everybody! Date: 01 Apr 1998 22:58:36 -0800 On Wed, 1 Apr 1998 20:49:11 -0500 ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) writes: >To whom it may concern- >Since Aurelia is busy with her many in-progress Buffyfics, I would >like to present my challenge to anyone who feels up to it. Here >goes... > >CHALLENGE: How 'bout some Angel/Willow fic? Sure, I know it's weird, >but so was Spike/Willow. If a good writer gets hold of this, the >impossible becomes a really cool story. I call it experimentation. >-Ingrid: Author of many long Buffyfics (and some short ones). "Return >to Normalcy," >"One Vampire's Headache...," "This Fleeting Hope," "Ghost of a >Chance," "Tragic >Sighs" and "Footsteps." > >Oh! BTW, I've been working on my "ten years into the future" story, in >case anyone was wondering. I'm working on the fourth part right now, >but I want to get well into it before I start sending it to the list. >Can you say 'pressure?' =) I'll take the challenge, but whether it will be good fanfic or totally reek to no end is debatable. I'm brainstorming as I type. Taygeta 8~) (Taygeta@juno.com) Writer of "The Chronicles of the White Knight" Writer of "Capeside: the Hellmouth" Writer of "Beyond the Creek" "Xander's lips met hers, softly and gently, and all Buffy could think about was that this was wow and a whole lot more." - from "Chronicles of the White Knight #5 In the Hands of Astarte _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Re: Discussion: Challenge Date: 02 Apr 1998 06:47:08 -0800 On Wed, 1 Apr 1998 20:49:11 -0500 ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) writes: > >CHALLENGE: How 'bout some Angel/Willow fic? I'll take the challenge, but whether it will be good fanfic or totally reek to no end is debatable. I'm brainstorming as I type. Taygeta 8~) (Taygeta@juno.com) Writer of "The Chronicles of the White Knight" Writer of "Capeside: the Hellmouth" Writer of "Beyond the Creek" "Xander's lips met hers, softly and gently, and all Buffy could think about was that this was wow and a whole lot more." - from "Chronicles of the White Knight #5 In the Hands of Astarte _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jaclyn Amy Subject: BUFFYFIC: BUFFYFIC Date: 02 Apr 1998 18:06:37 EST I Dreamed A Dream (1/1) by Jaclyn Amy TITLE: I Dreamed A Dream AUTHOR: Jaclyn Amy DISCLAIMER: I do not own the rights or characters to Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Les Miserables. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is owned by Joss Wheden, 20th Century Fox, Sandollar Productions, etc. "I Dreamed a Dream" is owned by Alain Boublil, Claude-Michael Schonberg, etc. No infringement intended. DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first. RATING: PG SPOILERS: None. SUMMARY: Angel’s soul has been taken from him, and he is now Angelus. He has killed Ms. Calendar and caused Buffy a great deal of pain. Buffy is upset and distressed at his torture. FEEDBACK: Please!!! This is my first fanfic, so be nice. Well, here it goes….. There was a time when men were kind When their voices were soft And their words inviting There was a time when love was blind And the world was a song And the song was exciting There was a time Then it all went wrong It has been three years, and I still sometimes wakeup and think Angel is here. I can still feel his arms around me, and when I close my eyes, I can still see his face. I play his voice in my head over and over until tears fill my eyes. It should’ve gotten easier over time. The pain should’ve left. As the Slayer, I should not still be mourning. But I can’t help but think of when he and I were a couple, madly in love. When everything was wonderful. When I counted the minutes until I saw him. But that is gone. I dreamed a dream in times gone by When hope was high And life worth living I dreamed that love would never die I dreamed that God would be forgiving Then I was young and unafraid And dreams were made and used and wasted There was no ransom to be paid No song unsung No wine untasted I remember when I thought that nothing could separate us. I was so young and blind. I never imagined what kind of pain that life could put you through. I thought my duty was such a terrible fate. I thought love would last forever; we would be together forever. I dreamed that I would spend every night in his bed. I dreamed that he would always be there to help me solve a problem or kiss my tears away. I was so oblivious of life’s cruelties. I took for granted the fact that I could see him every day. Life was perfect. But the tigers come at night With their voices soft as thunder As they tear your hope apart And they turn your dream to shame He slept a summer by my side He filled my days with endless wonder He took my childhood in his stride But he was gone when autumn came But it couldn’t last. No, life had to take him away. Life took my dreams away. I couldn’t live a life of happines. I remember my seventeen birthday night so vividly. We had run through the rain to his appartment after facing the Judge. The pain of a cut I had was emence. "Take off you shirt," he had ordered. I followed his command. "It’s already closed up." We kissed the most passionate kiss. "Buffy, maybe we shouldn’t-" "Just kiss me." He did just that…and more. It was the best experience of my life, and by far the most memorable. His sweet kisses, his gentle hands, the words "I love you." I do not regret making love to him; only the unknown consequences that had come with it. I had lay in his arms all night, but when I awoke, he was gone. Little did I know, it would be forever. And still I dream he'll come to me That we will live the years together But there are dreams that cannot be And there are storms we cannot weather I had a dream my life would be So different from this hell I'm living So different now from what it seemed Now life has killed The dream I dreamed My first instinct when there is a problem still is to run to him. I hope that one day, he will come back and we will finish our lives together. But that can’t and won’t ever happen. I know that Angel is gone, and there isn’t anything I can do to bring him back. I can still hope, though. I think hope is the only thing that keeps me alive. Hope and love. Though my life is so different from the way I desired, I can’t let it affect my future. Life is bitch; I’ve learned to accept it. But I’ll never accept that he is gone. I love him, but I’m on my own. Life has killed the dream I dream. I Dreamed A Dream There was a time when men were kind When their voices were soft And their words inviting There was a time when love was blind And the world was a song And the song was exciting There was a time Then it all went wrong I dreamed a dream in times gone by When hope was high And life worth living I dreamed that love would never die I dreamed that God would be forgiving Then I was young and unafraid And dreams were made and used and wasted There was no ransom to be paid No song unsung No wine untasted But the tigers come at night With their voices soft as thunder As they tear your hope apart And they turn your dream to shame He slept a summer by my side He filled my days with endless wonder He took my childhood in his stride But he was gone when autumn came And still I dream he'll come to me That we will live the years together But there are dreams that cannot be And there are storms we cannot weather I had a dream my life would be So different from this hell I'm living So different now from what it seemed Now life has killed The dream I dreamed The End - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: G90210 Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: BUFFYFIC Date: 02 Apr 1998 18:14:43 EST this was really good, it had me on the verge of tears. i think, you should do a follow up to that, where you have Angel come back(can never get enough of thoughs) because you seem very good with telling how she was feeling. ~mInDy - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jaclyn Amy Subject: BUFFYFIC: Thanks Date: 02 Apr 1998 18:27:23 EST Thanks, mInDy. I don't think I'm going to do a follow up on that one, but I'm starting a new one called Star-Crossed Lovers that will definately show Buffy's feelings. But reader beware, it's going to be pretty sad. -Jaclyn - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: GothGirl77 Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: I Dreamed A Dream (1/1) Date: 02 Apr 1998 20:22:13 EST This was great! I love stories that use song lyrics, and yours was very well written. From one fanfic newbie to another, keep it up! It's fun and all the feedback is a total ego boost! Nastassia - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: GothGirl77 Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: Until The Morning Light--Thanks everyone! Date: 02 Apr 1998 20:34:23 EST I just wanted to publically thank everyone for the wonderful feedback you gave me on a story. You guys really know how to make someone who is very new to fanfic writing and to the fic loop itself feel welcome. Some people on lists are, well, to quote Xander, bitcas. All the good story reviews were a total ego boost. And so the powers that be on this list don't get mad at me, here's something about future fanfic. I'm starting one of the longer stories I've ever written, and the 2nd Buffyfic story I've written. It's called Lily (at least for now), but I refuse to post it until I'm at least half done. Can't wait until study hall tomorrow. I'll have 90 minutes to work! Thanks again all you nice peope! Nastassia This list gives me a happy! - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: BUFFYFIC Date: 02 Apr 1998 18:08:04 -0800 Jacklyn, I loved your story, it was so sad even though I'm not a major Angel/Buffy fan my heart so went out! And what a perfect song! It has to be my second favorite in Les Miserables ( the first one being Fantine's Death), and ironically enough I was just thinking about that song a few weeks ago. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I think your incorporation of the song with the whole Buffy scenario was really cool and really worked well. Taygeta 8~) (Taygeta@juno.com) Writer of "The Chronicles of the White Knight" Writer of "Capeside: the Hellmouth" Writer of "Beyond the Creek" "Xander's lips met hers, softly and gently, and all Buffy could think about was that this was wow and a whole lot more." - from "Chronicles of the White Knight #5 In the Hands of Astarte _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chronicles of the White Knight (3/?) Date: 02 Apr 1998 19:54:12 -0800 Name: Chronicles of the White Knight #3 Understanding Willow Author: Taygeta Address: taygeta@juno.com Feedback: Please send Using in anything: Ask me first. Spoiler: Not really, just a few references to the show and past episodes. My own little ideas, but not really anything I think we'll happen as such. If it does occur, I had nothing to do with it. Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this story and any other references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other words, these characters do not belong to me, and I am just borrowing them. Description: The Chronicles is not really a multi-part story, but is a series of stories, some of which piece together and some of which don't. #3 involves Xander's thoughts on his relationship with Willow Warnings: Not really, unless you don't like Xander and don't really want to read about Xander and Willow. So basically the rating is: PG. ********************** Chronicles of the White Knight #3 Understanding Willow By: Taygeta Buffy took a sip of soda from a can of diet coke as she sat at a table near the window that overlooked the promenade. She glanced across the promenade and spotted what Willow called Oz's cool hair. The shade of orange-red could be seen for quite a distance, and Buffy smiled and thought silently that it was cute how Willow and he were always hold hands. She glanced over at Xander, who was sitting at the same table, and found that he was looking at the very same couple. Her scrutinizing eyes peered at Xander's expression, and she silent counted to herself, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... "Doesn't that just make you sick?" responded Xander waving his hand at the couple in a disgusted gesture. "Come on, Xander, they've been together for weeks!" said Buffy with a sigh, "It's not like your opinion counts in their relationship, so get over it!" "How can I if they keep rubbing their relationship in my face. I mean, every time I see them together it's all this touchy-feely stuff!" insisted Xander and Buffy rolled her eyes and put her soda can down, making a soft sound as the aluminum hit the table. "Right, Xander," said Buffy with an air of sarcasm, "And how do you justify you and Cordy's touch-feely stuff? Which I might add, is about ten time worse than what Oz and Willow do." "Hey, I resent that comment, Buffy because Cordy and I - " Xander paused a moment to contemplate, and feeling that Buffy's eyes were still on him, he chuckled nervously and glanced at her, "Never mind." "Yeah...that's what I thought," said Buffy with a smile, despite the fact that her acceptance of Cordelia had yet to begin. Xander didn't reply to Buffy's comment as he continued to stare at Oz and Willow. Xander contemplated that Willow looked happy, but he didn't believe she was because she was with Oz. What was Xander's opinion of Oz? Oz was just an orange-headed villain out to hurt his best friend. Once he reached to the thought of Willow being his best friend, he paused, unsure if that was what Willow was, nowadays. They were friends, Xander knew that for sure, but if they were BEST friends, was a whole other matter in its entirety. Things had been distant between them for quite awhile, Xander realized. Even before Cordelia and Oz had even entered the picture as romantic counterparts, their relationship had been readily changed. Did Buffy have anything to do with it, thought Xander for a moment and then he sighed realizing that she had, but not profoundly. Whatever had cause them to separate happened, and everything, well, it just made it worst than it had been before. He wanted very much to understand Willow. He would give anything to understand her, and try to make things back to the way it had been Yet, he knew that that way was gone and to return to it was impossible. He couldn't believe how much Willow had changed to become a Willow that he couldn't even understand. Still, had he ever understood her to begin with? It still shocked him to think that Willow had been in love with him, and he didn't think he'd ever get use to the idea, and now with Oz, he wouldn't have to. Oz, thought Xander, what a crazy guy, what does she see in him? Truthfully, he didn't really know what he had against Oz. The weird part was that if Oz was just one of the gang and had no romantic connection to Willow at all, he knew he would be friends with him. But the point was he wasn't just one of the gang, he was Willow's...boyfriend. Sure, Oz being a werewolf didn't make Xander like him any more, but for some odd reason, it didn't make Xander like him, any less. It just gave him more to complain about, more that made some reasonable sense anyway. He supposed a lot of his resentment came form his thoughts that Oz made his friendship with Willow even more strained, even though deep down, he knew that that wasn't true. Oz was only a factor because he was making him a factor, and although Willow was chummy with Cordelia, now, Xander knew that Willow was making her a factor, too. It was as if they were divided sides trying not to be separated, but their efforts just made them even more so. He thought again about Willow's face and finally realized that she was happy...with Oz. It didn't matter whether he liked it or not, it wasn't his choice to make, as Buffy had told him once. He stepped away from his heart because Buffy was in love with Angel, but Oz and Willow were different, he wouldn't have to step away. All he had to do was be happy because Willow was, and maybe in doing that, he could finally start treating Willow for what she had always been, and what he had always taken for granted, a true friend. Then, maybe, just maybe, he could start understanding Willow. **************** End of #3 _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Forbidden Love (1/2) Date: 02 Apr 1998 22:51:14 -0800 I finished it, a Willow/Angel and I am satisfied. It's a little bit more further than I've ever written before, and although it doesn't truly come right out and say it, it is very implying. Please reply if you decide to read it. Title: Forbidden Love Part One By: Taygeta Address: taygeta@juno.com Feedback: Please send Spoiler: Not really, a little bit from one episode a long time ago, but barely mentions that. Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this story and any other references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. In other words, these characters do not belong to me, and I am just borrowing them. Description: Willow and Angel, secret lovers, 'nuff said. Warning: Kisses...yeah, and implying a whole lot more, but no graphic details (not my style!) ********************** Forbidden Love (1/2) By: Taygeta Part One When I first met Angel, I noticed right away that he was incredibly handsome and I saw why my best friend, Buffy, was attracted to him. With his sharp features and seeking dark eyes and tall form, who wouldn't have wanted to fall under such a spell? I didn't, but it was out of my control to stop the inevitable from happening. It caused me to keep my screaming thoughts and feelings within me and never let them speak aloud for fear of hurting my best friend and for fear of hurting my heart. It was true, I was going through my Xander phase at that time, but even then, I knew it was a phase. Angel, on the other hand, could never be a phase. He was the first that I really, truly ever loved and he was the first in more ways than one. It was instant attraction when we first met, like magnetism that made our souls join and mingle. We both denied our hearts that pounded faster than tempest-tossed rains and within all of this denial, a pain was felt within my soul that was too hurtful to describe. In time, Angel had become Buffy's, but every time our eyes met, I could almost hear his heart beating in time with my mine. It was almost as if he were sending, with every beat, a pulse driving message that silently cried out to the world, "Willow, I love you, too..." but glances fell with every glance met and we walked away from feelings left unspoken. Still, all our running away, didn't make it any easier, it only made everything so much harder. These feelings weren't going to go away by themselves, and he knew it, and so did I. Be that as it may, Angel and I spoke not a word to each other. There were times when we almost did speak, but there were always so many other matters occurring around us that we couldn't. Then, he came to my bedroom one night, to seek help for Buffy, and although nothing happened, but what was necessary, everything happened at the same moment. I invited him in nervously, almost forgetting that he needed to be invited before he could come. He stood close by to me and I could smell the scent of his cologne and feel his strong, tall form surround me. So close by, he had been, so within my reach and I in his, but we couldn't...at least not then and certainly not there. Xander had found out that Angel had come to me in the night and to my bedroom and I had managed to reply jokingly, "Our is a forbidden love." Being Xander, he shook his head and smiled, but I guess he'll never know the truth of such a comment, and I will never tell him. There came a battle, in the midst of the fighting, Xander and Buffy were separated from us, and Angel and I were left to ourselves. It was one of those situations where holding someone's hand was excusable, and we made that situation our excuse to feel Romeo and Juliet's palm-to-palm kiss. However, this affectionate touch only made our hearts beat faster and only made us walk, not to the library like we planned, but to some place were we could be alone, where talking could be done, but the latter at a very later time. We arrived at his place, and before we could even open the door, the feelings locked for so long erupted in kisses of passion and desire. We finally pulled away and just stared at each other for a few seconds. I felt awkward in my pajamas, which I knew weren't the most elegant in the world. And I found myself comparing myself to Buffy and her looks and charms and I knew I couldn't compete against her, and then I realized as I glanced in his eyes, he had chosen to be with Buffy. He had chosen to be with me. Our lips met again, this time slower and more gently than before. His touch against my skin was...electrifying. Thoughts of forbidden love and worries about my friends vanished with every kiss and every caress and before I knew it, I had fallen into his cloak of darkness and decided silently that going elsewhere was impossible. **************End of Part 1 _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Kirstin" Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 14:06:46 -0500 I am wondering if there are any incredibly kind people out there who would beta read my first attempt at fanfic. I have a story that I've written called Fallen (some Angel/Willow stuff in response to Anya's story Gone . . . ) that I was wondering if someone would read for me and help me with. I would really appreciate it, but totally understand if people are too busy. Thanks a lot! Kirstin kmo@acpub.duke.edu - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Aglx Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 14:29:47 EST I'll beta read your story. -Michelle. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Aglx Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Dark One (6/6) Date: 03 Apr 1998 14:31:56 EST Title: The Dark One (6/6) Author: Michelle Email Addy: Aglx@aol.com Rating: PG Spoiler: All episodes up to Killed By Death Feedback: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!! Disclaimer: Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, etc. The Story and the characters not part of the regular cast are mine! The Dark One Part 6 She stood in the middle of the field with the cold night's breeze blowing against her body. A stake sat easily reached strapped to her back. A knife was in her shoe under her pant leg. A dark figure slowly approached her from across the field. "Sorry I'm late Buffy. I hope you haven't been waiting long." "Let's just get this over with." "Whatever you say." Savarah leaped through the air until she stood a few feet away from Buffy. Buffy stood still for a moment and then kicked Savarah in the chin. The hit made her fall to the ground but she quickly recovered to her feet. "Good shot. I was beginning to forget what it feels like to hurt." "Don't worry, I won't let you forget." "Buffy punched her in the face several times and then kicked her in the side of the head with a roundhouse kick. "Okay, that is enough." Savarah kicked Buffy in the stomach five times and then kicked her directly in the face. Buffy stumbled back a few steps as she nursed her bloody face. "That had to hurt." "No, not really. Giles can hit harder than you." Savarah flew into the air towards Buffy but her kick was dodged. Savarah hit the ground hard. She moaned as she tried to get to her feet. "Not so tough with out your super powers, huh?" Buffy kicked Savarah in the stomach preventing her from getting to her feet. Buffy backed away as Savarah got to her feet. While Savarah was still in pain, Buffy grabbed the stake from her back and threw it at Savarah. She caught the stake in her hands and smiled. "Nice try, slayer. You're just not going to win this one." Savarah approached Buffy with the stake in her hands. Savarah raised her hand and Buffy flew threw the air hitting the ground in great pain. "What happened to a fair fight?" Buffy couldn't get up. "Oh, that, well it was a lie." Savarah stood over Buffy, ready to kill her like she had killed so many of her friends. Buffy looked up expecting to die when she remembered the knife in her shoe. Buffy threw her legs up into the air and knocked Savarah off of her. She grabbed the knife from beneath her pant leg and threw it into Savarah's back. She cried out in pain before pulling it out. "Stupid girl. You know better than that." Savarah jumped over to Buffy and kneeled down over her. Savarah taunted Buffy with the knife at her neck. "This is going to hurt. A lot." Buffy closed her eyes as she felt the cold knife moving across her neck. The knife dropped and Buffy opened her eyes to a familiar face. A sense of de sha vu struck her for a brief moment before she returned to reality. "Angel?" Buffy sat up feeling her neck for any wounds. Angel didn't answer. He turned and walked away into the darkness of the night. End of the Dark One Series. Please send feedback. If I get any good response I may do a series to follow this one up. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Kirstin" Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 14:50:28 -0500 thank you so much! :) okay, here it is. title: Fallen author: Kirstin e-mail: kmo@acpub.duke.edu There is no statute of limitations on forever, she told herself. You told him you love him. You have to honor that. But it was getting harder. So much had changed, in the month since he had left, in the weeks since she had. Things were completely different; she was completely different. And maybe somewhere inside she would always love him, but a different kind of love than she used to think. She had grown up with him, no matter how far apart they were, they would always be best friends. But she was beginning to see that distance really did matter, and that it wouldn't mean that she loved him less, if she let herself love someone else more. Buffy. How could she do this to Buffy? That was a completely different issue. She knew that Xander had never loved her the way she loved him. She wasn't betraying him. But she was betraying Buffy. In such a short time, the girls had grown so close. Buffy had opened her eyes, shown her things that she never knew existed. Willow had grown up a lot through their friendship, but she had grown even more when it ended. There was no way she could justify this. It was nothing but betrayal. Even though Angel and Buffy had never let themselves get too close, Willow knew that Buffy was in love. How could she do that to her best friend, even if Buffy and Angel would never see each other again? How could she ignore what she knew was right? But maybe Buffy and Angel weren't meant to be, Willow thought. After all, isn't he everything she is fighting against? It never would have worked out in the long run. They couldn't have had a future. A vampire and the slayer, that's practically the definition of star-crossed. Willow, on the other hand, knew exactly what Angel went through. She knew the bloodlust, and the guilt after. She knew what it was to be everything that she hated in the world, and together maybe they could make things work out. Maybe they did have a chance . . . Angel doesn't even want me, Willow decided. There is no way we have a chance. Just because I decided to be an awful person and turn against all of my friends doesn't mean that he has. He loves Buffy. I am just a friend. He wouldn't even have come with me, but he probably wanted to watch me in case I went full out vamp. Giles just made him come along to stake me if I started any problems. That's all it is. But when he looks at me now, it's different. Softer. It's like he has noticed that I'm changing too. I'm not the girl I used to be. I feel older, a lot less naive. And when I see myself, what little of myself I can still see in the mirror, I look different too. There's something there that wasn't there before. And I like it. I think I'm finally starting to see myself as beautiful. And someday maybe I'll find someone to love me like I love him . . . maybe someday Angel might fall in love with me, like I'm falling in love with him. ***** This hadn't just started. It wasn't like he woke up last week and thought, hmm, maybe Willow. And it wasn't just because Buffy was gone, or because Willow was a vampire. There was more to it. In a way, it had always been there. He and Willow had always gotten along. She was the one to stick up for him. And she had always been beautiful. That was definite. But there was something new. Something in the way that she carried herself, something behind her eyes. She looked older, wiser, and a little more sure of herself. In the middle of all of her problems, she had really grown up and found herself. Willow could always make the best of a bad situation. She was smart, and fun, and he loved being around her. He had always known that, too. What he hadn't always known though, what he was beginning to discover, was that he was falling in love with her, with Willow. If he really thought about it, he had probably started to notice sometime just before Buffy and Xander had gone on their respective vacations. He, Willow, Giles, Jenny, and Cordelia had thrown a makeshift goodbye party for the departing Slayer and Slayerette. He remembered one point in the evening when he was alone with Willow, setting up for the party. They were getting out the cake, setting up plates and glasses, the usual pre-party fare. At some point in their stream of idle conversation, Willow said something that made him take notice. "I can't believe they're going to be gone for so long! Xander is leaving tomorrow, and Buffy just a few days after. I guess I'll get good at doing research, since I'll be all alone for a month, I can catch up on my prophecies or something. Bye-bye hanging out and having fun," Willow said sadly. "Don't worry Willow; I promise a lot of hanging out and having fun this summer. As long as 241 year old dead guys are your style," Angel answered with a laugh. "I guess that could be included in my definition of fun," she said, brightening up. "Maybe we could go Bronzing sometimes?" she asked hopefully. "Sure," he answered, "I'd love to dance with you." I wonder if she saw then what I saw, Angel thought. I wonder if the same forbidden thoughts were running through her mind then, and later. We spent so much time together. By day, she was Giles' research girl, but at night, she was mine. Did she feel it too? When we did the rounds at night, did the same feelings tug at her soul as tugged at mine? I just wanted to be with her, all the time. She had to know. God, I was so obvious sometimes! I acted like a sixteen-year-old, not a 241-year vampire. It's a good thing that vampires don't sweat. She would have noticed my damp palms dancing at the Bronze. I love holding her close like that, her tiny body folded into mine. It was all I could do not to kiss her then, even before everything happened and I knew I would never see Buffy again. Even if this had never happened, I would have had to end things with Buffy when she got back. I wouldn't have approached Willow, I couldn't put that strain on their friendship, but I also couldn't allow myself to lead Buffy on like that. I knew even then that she wasn't the one I loved. When Willow didn't answer my call the night they got her, I was trapped in fear. I ran through the city, looking everywhere I thought she might be. Finally, I reached the Anointed One's lair. I remember her, lying on the ground. She was passed out, sick. She was so cold when I picked her up. What if she had been dead? Well, in a way, she was dead. The fear raced through me. Thank god Giles was home when I got there. He found a pulse, a quiet low pulse. So we waited. I think he might have known how I feel about her. He could see it. I know that there is nothing for her in Europe. There are no Rom to cure her. She is what she is forever. I think Giles knows that too, but neither of us could tell Willow. This is her last hope. Maybe there is something there though, something that will reassure her, even if it won't cure her. She has a lot of fighting to do. Together though, I know we can get through it. I can help her control her urges, and she can help me with mine. We're good for each other. Sunnydale was bad for both of us. That's why I filled her head with hopes of an anchor for her soul. In Sunnydale, she would have driven a stake into her heart eventually, or forced Buffy to do it for her. She couldn't have handled being what she was, a Slayerette who should have been one of the slain. Giles and I knew that to keep her alive, we had to keep her away from home. And so we're going to Europe. We're going together. I hope that someday, we can truly be together. Maybe someday Willow might fall in love with me, like I've fallen in love with her. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Janine Sebastian Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 11:23:36 -0800 (PST) Kristin, Pick me! Pick me! Pick me! (sorry Robyn the Snowshoe-Hare hypnotized me and reverted me to the subconscious of a grade two'er) Seriously though, I'd love to betaread your stuff. I usually end up correcting spelling etc. when I read these stories anyways (my computer has an annoying habit of underlining in red everything that is misspelled. It gets to the point where the only way to get rid of the red is to correct the sp. Jeanie the Tortoise-Fly ---Kirstin wrote: > > I am wondering if there are any incredibly kind people out there who would > beta read my first attempt at fanfic. I have a story that I've written > called Fallen (some Angel/Willow stuff in response to Anya's story Gone . . > . ) that I was wondering if someone would read for me and help me with. I > would really appreciate it, but totally understand if people are too busy. > Thanks a lot! > Kirstin > kmo@acpub.duke.edu _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Kirstin" Subject: Re:Re: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 15:33:52 -0500 as regards to the buffyfic i just inadvertently sent out, let me get the specifics down here, the standard disclaimers and what-have-yous. title: Fallen (1/1) rating: strictly G or PG here. nothing anybody can't read. disclaimer: these characters are joss's, the wb's, mutant enemy's, anyone else who has a valid claim that i don't know about's property. they aren't mine. neither is the stuff from Gone . . ., Anya's story, which this is a sequel to. the ideas here, however, are mine. please don't steal them distribution: ask and ye shall receive. feedback: pretty please with a cherry on top. apologies: this hasn't been beta read yet (due to an error it as sent out early.) i will send it out later with appropriate revisions. if you so choose, you can not read the version i sent now, since the later version will theoretically be better. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jaclyn Amy Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: The Dark One (6/6) Date: 03 Apr 1998 15:54:44 EST That was great! You should definately follow up. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: CalliScrlt Subject: BUFFYFIC: Equinox (1/7) Date: 03 Apr 1998 18:40:34 EST TITLE: Equinox AUTHOR: Calligraphy (It's a pen name, I like it, so there! :P ) E-MAIL: CalliScrlt@aol.com or Showtunejunkie@juno.com RATING: This part is probably PG-14... maybe R. SPOILERS: Up until Passion, but not if you nitpick about Angelus being= =0Ainvited in. ;) SUMMARY: Oz/Willow romance and/or Oz the Freaky Werewolf Story, Angelus= =0Amaking a guest appearance, as well as Buffy. DIST: Anyone who wants it can have it, just E-mail me and tell me you're= =0Ataking it! DISCLAIMER: All the characters below don't belong to me. I'm just borro= wing=0Athem for the time being. Except for Todd, and I don't like him, s= o anyone who=0Awants him can have him and sacrifice him to vampires. All= the characters=0Abelong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy Inc, all them other= companies. Please=0Adon't sue. I love BTVS devotedly. Equinox by Calligraphy ********************************************* Willow Rosenburg stared at the page of calculus homework, the theorems= =0Adancing through her mind in a calming, peaceful way. Few people liked= school=0Awork, but she found it extremely relaxing. And after the week = she=92d had, she=0Aneeded it desperately. Angelus had tried to kill Buff= y, Giles was still=0Areally freaked out about Ms. Calendar=92s death. Ev= eryone was under a lot of=0Astrain. "RRIINNG!" Willow picked up the pho= ne, hearing Buffy=92s insistent=0Avoice over the line. "So, we Bronzin=92 it tonight? Xander=92s bringing Cordelia, You can bri= ng Oz,=0Aand I=92ll just sit in the corner and mope because I=92m current= ly a social=0Aleper." "Buffy, don=92t be so hard on yourself. You=92ll meet another guy." "The only time I=92ve met anyone in the past month is in a graveyard, and= the=0Aconversation=92s usually pretty short, if you know what I mean. S= o, what time=0Acan we expect you?" "I=92m not coming. I=92ve got Calculus homework to do." "You=92d miss a chance to be with Oz? That=92s a switch." Willow blushed crimson. "He can=92t go either." "Why? His band can=92t have a gig. There=92s no place to play other tha= n the=0ABronze." "No, it=92s not that. It=92s=97" "What?" "H-his time of the month." Willow chewed her bottom lip as Buffy laughed= .=0A"It=92s actually not, there isn=92t another full moon for two weeks, = but tonight=92s=0Asupposed to be the equinox, and since Giles couldn=92t = find anything in his=0Abooks about it, Oz thought it would be better to b= e on the safe side, and, you=0Aknow, stay in." Willow could imagine Buffy sitting on her bed on the other end, chuckling= to=0Aherself and thinking how pathetic she was to be dating someone like= Oz.=0AWillow didn=92t want to admit it, but she envied Buffy. After all= , Buffy was=0Athe experienced one, whereas Oz seemed to lose interest pas= t a few kisses.=0AMaybe losing interest wasn=92t the right phrase. It wa= s more like he was=0Aholding back. She snapped back to attention. Buffy was talking again. "=85Sure you do= n=92t=0Awant to go? We can drink cappuccino and be lonely together." Wi= llow was=0Aabout to decline, when Buffy went on. "Please? I need someon= e to be around=0Afor awhile." Willow sighed, ever so softly, and answered. "All right, Buffy. I=92ll = meet=0Ayou there at seven?" "It=92s a date! Now I=92ve got to go find an outfit! Bye!" She hung up= . Willow=92s slipped the cradle into the receiver, and leaned back against = her=0Abed. It=92s hard to be best friends with Ms. Emotional Rollercoas= ter,=0Aotherwise known as the Vampire Slayer. *********(Oz=92s House)********* Oz bolted the door, slipping the key underneath it. When he was coherent= =0Aagain, he could pull it back through. In wolf form, his claws were to= o big to=0Areach it. His father wondered if it was a necessary precautio= n. He=92d heard=0Aof the family ailment, and while he didn=92t have it h= imself, he also knew that=0AOz had never before managed to get the shackl= es off and make it all the way to=0Athe door. Still, Oz liked to be safe. After he heard he almost killed Willow, he s= pent=0Aall morning in a fog, trying to decide whether to cut school and m= ove to=0ACanada. He=92d heard it was nice. Lots of trees. Open space. = Fastening the=0Ashackles first around his feet, then his wrists, he thou= ght about what if he=0Aand Willow got married and moved there. Subconsci= ously, he tried not to think=0Aabout changing. It was easier when you we= ren=92t tense. Maybe they would have=0Akids. Two, or three. Not that = one wouldn=92t be great, but he=92d been an only=0Achild, and he=92d alwa= ys been envious of his cousins, who came from a family of=0Atwelve kids. = Yes, twelve. They lived in the mountains. These weren=92t the=0Acousin= s that included Jordie, his family was in Northern LA He tried to reach= =0Athem all week, to see what they knew about the equinox, but they seeme= d to be=0Aout at a family reunion. Oz puzzled over this, wondering why a= family reunion=0Ahadn=92t included his family, and then he=92d dismissed= it as being the family on=0Ahis aunt=92s side. Reclining back against t= he wall of the bare bonus room, he=0Ashivered, and drifted off to sleep. = If he changed, hopefully, he wouldn=92t=0Aremember it. *********(The Bronze)********* Willow stirred her cappuccino idly with a cinnamon stick. Briefly, she= =0Aglanced out to the dance floor, Xander and Cordelia writhing around in= a dance=0Athat was just a step above the Lambada. Buffy, at Willow=92s= own urging, was=0Anow out dancing with some guy named Todd. The music w= as giving her a=0Aheadache, and she sipped the cappuccino with care. She= shouldn=92t have=0Abothered to come. *********(Oz=92s House)********* Oz jerked awake, trying to catch his breath. He=92d had the weirdest dre= am.=0AProbably because he=92d spent the night as a werewolf trying to str= uggle out of=0Aclothes and shackles. But wait. Something was wrong. It= hit him, as he=0Aunlocked the shackles. There was no sign of any troubl= e. No weird-looking=0Asaliva (ick, but hey, you=92ve gotta take the bad = with the good), no tears in=0Ahis shirt, and he was in about the same po= sition as he was before he fell=0Aasleep. Checking his watch, he chuckle= d to himself. It was only nine thirty=0Aat night. He hadn=92t changed a= bit. That settled the Equinox question, he thought. He wondered where Willow = was,=0Aand then remembered she said something about turning in early. Sl= iding the=0Akey back from under the door, Oz let himself out into the off= ice/library,=0Amostly his because his father was a busy executive, and hi= s mother was on a=0Alecture tour on women=92s rights and empowerment. It= always sounded to Oz like=0Ashe was just a less commercialized self-help= guru. Either way, they both were=0Anever around, and they bought him in= credible presents to make up for it. Such=0Aas his guitar and amp. Saun= tering into the bathroom, he looked into the=0Amirror, checking his hair.= The outfit didn=92t matter, but the hair always had=0Ato be good before= he did anything. Slipping in an earring, he decided he=92d=0Ahead to th= e Bronze and see if Devon was there. Though he didn=92t think much of=0A= his best friend, he enjoyed the clear fact that they had nothing in commo= n=0Aexcept for the band, and that, the more you thought about it, they we= re=0Aperfect foils for each other. Rifling through a pile of semi-clean clothes, Oz found his car keys, befo= re=0Aremembering that his van was in the shop. Tossing them aside, he de= cided to=0Ajust walk. Which was probably a good idea, he thought=85 He h= ad an odd,=0Arestless feeling he needed to work off. *********(The Bronze)********* Willow lifted her head off of the table. Her cappuccino was cold, and th= e=0ABronze was silent and very dark. Looking around, she ventured a word= .=0A"=85Buffy=85?" The walls echoed the name back to her, and suddenly, = the double=0Adoors across the Bronze opened. Angelus stood in the doorway, a stale wind flapping the tails of his tren= ch=0Acoat. His eyes were cold steel, and he spotted Willow immediately. = Baring=0Ahis fangs, he stalked her, making his way to the booth with lig= htning speed. She tried to move, but her feet seemed glued to the table. In an instant= , he=0Awas on top of her, jerking her head to the side, her v-necked shir= t giving him=0Aeasy access to her throat. Willow felt his fangs slide ac= ross her flesh,=0Asearching for a vein, she surmised. But the bite she = expected didn=92t come.=0AHis fangs danced over her neck, his lips kissin= g her gently. "Willow=85" He=0Awhispered, his lips meeting hers. "Willow?" Willow looked up, seeing only Angelus for a moment, then her gaze shifted= . "WILLOW?!!!" Buffy stood above her, growling, crossbow trained on Willow= =92s=0Athroat. Standing next to her was a huge frog. Willow saw her reach for the trigger, and shouted. "Buffy!" TO BE CONTINUED....!!! ******************** Want to hear more?! I want feedback! CalliScrlt@aol.com=0A - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (1/?) by Ingrid Date: 03 Apr 1998 18:39:45 -0500 DISCLAIMER: The characters of Buffy, Giles, Spike, Drusilla, Willow, Angel & co. are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, and The Warner Brothers Network, and are used without permission. The author claims no rights to these characters. SUMMARY: Oh God! You know what? I just can’t keep my word! I was planning on writing the whole thing before sending it to the list, but at that rate, you’d never get it, so here goes… Welcome to my new story. This one might be a tad difficult to understand at first, since it takes place ten years into the future, and I’m not telling you what’s happened in advance. I’m going to reveal that as time goes on in the story. I love to get feedback, except when my mailbox explodes, which is often, but send it anyway! My address is Ingrid29@juno.com. ********* "Reunion" by Ingrid Part One: "Portents" ********* The moon was large and seemed to expand with every step she took toward she knew not where. Blood dripped from each star in the sky. The grass was damp and fresh against her bare feet, perfect for relaxation, but something was driving her towards the river. A still lake reflected the light somberly, completely black otherwise. She bent down and watched the light grow stronger. Now the water was rippling outward in circles. Startled, she bent down and reached out for the fish. Instead, a hideous face rose from the water, its large glassy blue eyes staring vacantly upward. The body was bloated with the water, and the face distorted, but suddenly things became as clear as the lake itself. Willow. The red hair floated around her, framing her face, and quickly turned to a silvery gray. In an instant, the face began to cry tears of blood, screaming her name. It didn’t matter that she was decomposing- this was Willow. Buffy reached out for the head a moment to late. It writhed in agony as if being pulled back under by force, and again, the dark lake became calm. Buffy stood up, and continued around the lake to see countless heads floating in the water, disappearing like holograms if she got too close. The lake turned black with blood, the thick liquid lapping at the earth surrounding it. Something was emerging from behind the trees at the far side of the lake. A single hooded figure paddled a rowboat through the mess and seemed to be searching among the faces for one in particular. Buffy ran to the edge of the lake frantically. The oarsman removed the cloth slowly, revealing a bleached hair and a pale complexion. "Dru!" He screamed, violently shoving the heads away when he couldn’t find the face of his love. Thunder raged, and lightning ripped the sky in two. Thousands of mouths began to groan. Then he looked up, catching sight of her. "You killed her, but now it’s time, slayer," he shouted over the horrible wail. Tears streamed down the bloodless cheeks and his face contorted. "IT’S TIME," he roared again, and she saw him drop a silver pocket watch into the blood-water. Once again, lightning illuminated the sky, and then faded to the dark of the sheets on her bed. Back to reality. Their place. Her life. Angel sleeping peacefully next to her. She made no sound but couldn’t seem to stop shaking. So much of what she’d seen was part of a life that existed for her now only in memories. Bad Memories. Seeing Willow’s face, fresh in her mind- and the way she’d looked! It was terrifying to recall. She coughed suddenly. That was what woke him up. "Buffy," he murmured half in sleep, pulling her closer. He sobered quickly when he felt the tremors of her body. "Buffy, what’s wrong?" Angel probed her eyes for the cause of such distress, though it wasn’t too hard to figure out at this point. Things had been so peaceful for years now, until recently. Recently, she’d begun to have the dreams again. They were like those that she used to have right before she’d become a slayer. But that was all over now, wasn’t it? They’d assured her, Buffy had told him, that that had been the end. They hadn’t mentioned nightmares after discharge. She sighed and avoided direct eye-contact. "Yeah. Just another dream. Nothing to worry about." *Why does he have to be such a damned light sleeper,* she added mentally. *Your husband,* she reminded herself, *he’s your husband and he’s supposed to be concerned.* But she didn’t have any answers for him, and that was the most disturbing part of all. She tried to bury her head in the pillow, but her attempts proved unsuccessful. He tipped her chin up towards him and kissed her gently on the lips. "Maybe we should talk to-" "Don’t even say it, Angel. I’d have to kill you." "But Buffy, he knows…" His voice trailed off, lost on some forgotten trail. "He’s not the watcher anymore. I’m not the slayer. What makes you think that these dreams have anything to do with slayers? Couldn’t I just be having regular nightmares?" "Do they feel like regular nightmares?" "Okay, I admit, they are strange." "What did you see this time?" She paused, and finally conceded to his pleading eyes. "Willow. Willow, and Spike. She was dead Angel. Her head was in the water, and she was floating. It was horrible." He tightened his arms around her, and she began to accept his comfort, settling against him finally. "Buffy, I know you don’t want to raise ghosts, or bring back old demons, and I know I’m the last person he’d want sending you to him, but if he can help-" "Angel, no." She raised her voice, nearly crying now, "I’ve put that life behind me now. It’s over. I made it. And we’ve all suffered, but he’s suffered the most. I want to let him have some kind of peace. He left because he wanted to be alone, not because he wanted me to go traipsing cross-country and dump my baggage on him. I won’t do it!" A high pitched wail pierced the stillness of the night. Buffy’s eyes were welling up now, like ghosts manifest. She coughed desperately and dropped her head into her hands. Angel touched her on the shoulder briefly and went to answer the cry. She didn’t look up. Suddenly, there was silence again. She dragged herself from her seat on the bed and crossed the hall. He held the baby in his arms, the blue light from the window pouring down on them both, making them more like a fragment of her dream than something real. She could see the bond between them. Ever since Willow had been born, she and Angel had been attached at the hip. She represented hope to him, and the realization of a dream he’d given up hundreds of years ago. The delicate eyes were drooping now as he lowered the child back into her crib. Buffy crossed the room and stood by, joining him in looking on at their daughter, who was now sleeping with a peace she could barely remember ever having. Angel suddenly looked exhausted, and she came to her senses finally, pulling him back with her into the bedroom. She slipped into bed next to him and closed her eyes. Searching her mind, she tried to play back warmer days in her head, but nothing was retrievable. For the rest of the night, all she could see was that face. *** END, PART ONE. Tell me what you thought. I cannot live on posts alone! (Ingrid29@juno.com) Ingrid: Author of many long Buffyfics (and some short ones). "Return to Normalcy," "One Vampire's Headache...," "This Fleeting Hope," "Ghost of a Chance," "Tragic Sighs" and "Footsteps." _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Daphne1784 Subject: BUFFYFIC: Test Readers needed for Homecoming Pt 2/? Date: 03 Apr 1998 19:24:48 EST Hi. This is Katherine again. I know you haven't heard from me for a while but I just finished the second part to my story, "Homecoming", and since I am very insecure about this story since it is my very first fanfic, I'm asking you, the loyal readers to please proof my story. Thanks! - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: hjrobert@nap.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: beta reader request Date: 03 Apr 1998 19:32:58 +0000 OH MY GOD!!! that was the mother of awsome storys! write a sequal!!! There is no statute of limitations on forever, she told herself. You told him you love him. You have to honor that. But it was getting harder. So much had changed, in the month since he had left, in the weeks since she had. Things were completely different; she was completely different. And maybe somewhere inside she would always love him, but a different kind of love than she used to think. She had grown up with him, no matter how far apart they were, they would always be best friends. But she was beginning to see that distance really did matter, and that it wouldn't mean that she loved him less, if she let herself love someone else more. Buffy. How could she do this to Buffy? That was a completely different issue. She knew that Xander had never loved her the way she loved him. She wasn't betraying him. But she was betraying Buffy. In such a short time, the girls had grown so close. Buffy had opened her eyes, shown her things that she never knew existed. Willow had grown up a lot through their friendship, but she had grown even more when it ended. There was no way she could justify this. It was nothing but betrayal. Even though Angel and Buffy had never let themselves get too close, Willow knew that Buffy was in love. How could she do that to her best friend, even if Buffy and Angel would never see each other again? How could she ignore what she knew was right? But maybe Buffy and Angel weren't meant to be, Willow thought. After all, isn't he everything she is fighting against? It never would have worked out in the long run. They couldn't have had a future. A vampire and the slayer, that's practically the definition of star-crossed. Willow, on the other hand, knew exactly what Angel went through. She knew the bloodlust, and the guilt after. She knew what it was to be everything that she hated in the world, and together maybe they could make things work out. Maybe they did have a chance . . . Angel doesn't even want me, Willow decided. There is no way we have a chance. Just because I decided to be an awful person and turn against all of my friends doesn't mean that he has. He loves Buffy. I am just a friend. He wouldn't even have come with me, but he probably wanted to watch me in case I went full out vamp. Giles just made him come along to stake me if I started any problems. That's all it is. But when he looks at me now, it's different. Softer. It's like he has noticed that I'm changing too. I'm not the girl I used to be. I feel older, a lot less naive. And when I see myself, what little of myself I can still see in the mirror, I look different too. There's something there that wasn't there before. And I like it. I think I'm finally starting to see myself as beautiful. And someday maybe I'll find someone to love me like I love him . . . maybe someday Angel might fall in love with me, like I'm falling in love with him. ***** This hadn't just started. It wasn't like he woke up last week and thought, hmm, maybe Willow. And it wasn't just because Buffy was gone, or because Willow was a vampire. There was more to it. In a way, it had always been there. He and Willow had always gotten along. She was the one to stick up for him. And she had always been beautiful. That was definite. But there was something new. Something in the way that she carried herself, something behind her eyes. She looked older, wiser, and a little more sure of herself. In the middle of all of her problems, she had really grown up and found herself. Willow could always make the best of a bad situation. She was smart, and fun, and he loved being around her. He had always known that, too. What he hadn't always known though, what he was beginning to discover, was that he was falling in love with her, with Willow. If he really thought about it, he had probably started to notice sometime just before Buffy and Xander had gone on their respective vacations. He, Willow, Giles, Jenny, and Cordelia had thrown a makeshift goodbye party for the departing Slayer and Slayerette. He remembered one point in the evening when he was alone with Willow, setting up for the party. They were getting out the cake, setting up plates and glasses, the usual pre-party fare. At some point in their stream of idle conversation, Willow said something that made him take notice. "I can't believe they're going to be gone for so long! Xander is leaving tomorrow, and Buffy just a few days after. I guess I'll get good at doing research, since I'll be all alone for a month, I can catch up on my prophecies or something. Bye-bye hanging out and having fun," Willow said sadly. "Don't worry Willow; I promise a lot of hanging out and having fun this summer. As long as 241 year old dead guys are your style," Angel answered with a laugh. "I guess that could be included in my definition of fun," she said, brightening up. "Maybe we could go Bronzing sometimes?" she asked hopefully. "Sure," he answered, "I'd love to dance with you." I wonder if she saw then what I saw, Angel thought. I wonder if the same forbidden thoughts were running through her mind then, and later. We spent so much time together. By day, she was Giles' research girl, but at night, she was mine. Did she feel it too? When we did the rounds at night, did the same feelings tug at her soul as tugged at mine? I just wanted to be with her, all the time. She had to know. God, I was so obvious sometimes! I acted like a sixteen-year-old, not a 241-year vampire. It's a good thing that vampires don't sweat. She would have noticed my damp palms dancing at the Bronze. I love holding her close like that, her tiny body folded into mine. It was all I could do not to kiss her then, even before everything happened and I knew I would never see Buffy again. Even if this had never happened, I would have had to end things with Buffy when she got back. I wouldn't have approached Willow, I couldn't put that strain on their friendship, but I also couldn't allow myself to lead Buffy on like that. I knew even then that she wasn't the one I loved. When Willow didn't answer my call the night they got her, I was trapped in fear. I ran through the city, looking everywhere I thought she might be. Finally, I reached the Anointed One's lair. I remember her, lying on the ground. She was passed out, sick. She was so cold when I picked her up. What if she had been dead? Well, in a way, she was dead. The fear raced through me. Thank god Giles was home when I got there. He found a pulse, a quiet low pulse. So we waited. I think he might have known how I feel about her. He could see it. I know that there is nothing for her in Europe. There are no Rom to cure her. She is what she is forever. I think Giles knows that too, but neither of us could tell Willow. This is her last hope. Maybe there is something there though, something that will reassure her, even if it won't cure her. She has a lot of fighting to do. Together though, I know we can get through it. I can help her control her urges, and she can help me with mine. We're good for each other. Sunnydale was bad for both of us. That's why I filled her head with hopes of an anchor for her soul. In Sunnydale, she would have driven a stake into her heart eventually, or forced Buffy to do it for her. She couldn't have handled being what she was, a Slayerette who should have been one of the slain. Giles and I knew that to keep her alive, we had to keep her away from home. And so we're going to Europe. We're going together. I hope that someday, we can truly be together. Maybe someday Willow might fall in love with me, like I've fallen in love with her. - - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: taygeta@juno.com (Charity C Tran) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Buffyfic: Chronicles of the White Knight (4/?) Date: 03 Apr 1998 16:42:57 -0800 Name: The Chronicles of the White Knight #4 Never the One Author: Taygeta Address: taygeta@juno.com Feedback: Please send Uses in anything: Ask me first. Spoiler: Not really, might have mentioned a past episode. Description: Cordelia has a dream about Xander and Buffy Disclaimer: The Buffy characters portrayed in this story and any other references to Buffy the Vampire Slayer are the property of its creater Joss Whedon, and its owners Mutant Enemy productions, Kuzui Productions, Sandollar Productions, and 20th Century Fox. Warning: Not really, just kissing, and no major violence or foul language. So, PG ********************* Chronicles of the White Knight #4 Never the One By: Taygeta "Are you sure, Cordelia?" asked Xander with a sigh as he cradled the phone against his shoulder why pouring himself a glass of milk. "Of course, I'm sure, Xander," said Cordelia with a sigh after some repetitive coughing, "Go to the dance with them. Just because I'm sick doesn't mean you can't go." "But Cordelia not going to a school dance seems wrong somehow," replied Xander placing the carton back into the refrigerator and closing the door. "Yeah, but Xander not going to a dance won't make a difference, now would it?" retorted Cordelia straightforwardly. "Well, if you put it that way - " Xander began, but he stopped, "Look, Cordy, just try and get better, huh? I mean, who else am I going to argue with at school, and let's not forget, kiss and make-up with?" "It's not like I'm Buffy and can just slay this cold!" said Cordelia with a laugh, "Hey, what's up with her and her clothes nowadays anyway? Don't you remember that thing she wore a few days ago? You know that blue thing?" Xander ignored her comments of Buffy, like he always did and with a sigh he said, "Just get better, Cordy, huh? And I'll see you as soon as I can." Before Xander could hang up, he heard Cordelia's voice say, "Go to the dance, Xander! You don't have to stay home on my account." When he did hang up, Cordelia sighed, and felt her head throbbing from her head cold. She not only felt awful, but she knew she looked just as awful. Dropping her head onto her large white pillows, Cordelia couldn't help, but wonder was Xander going to the dance or staying home? She knew that despite all of what she had said to him to make him go the dance she wanted to think that Xander would do something romantic like stay with her and help her get better. Cordelia shook her head and knew that although Xander could be romantic, he wasn't when it came to her most of the time, and most of time she even wondered if he knew if she was alive. She yawned and thought that having a nice early nap would help her get better. Still, her thoughts were of Xander and Buffy, and she was so worried about all of that that she fell into a troubling dream. A nightmare for her, but she knew that it was a dream beyond dreams for her boyfriend who was in love with someone else... ...As she walked into the building, she realized that the Bronze was a little more smoke-filled than it had been usually, but considering that the dance was being held there, it wasn't unusual. Oz and his band, "The Dingoes Ate My Baby" played a slow song and Willow, as usual, was gazing at Oz with a dreamy expression. She was now an official groupie, and she didn't mind that she didn't get to dance because her boyfriend was in the band, more or less because she didn't like to dance. Meaning, that she thought that that was a plus in her new relationship. Cordelia peered at the table, noticing that Willow wasn't alone, and that Xander and Buffy were seated beside her, laughing. She walked towards them, but when she sat down at their table, she was surprised that they didn't even notice her. "Hey, guys, I came!" Cordelia said in her normal voice, but still no one saw her there. "Buffy, what do you say to dancing?" asked Xander suddenly, standing up from his seat, and Cordelia saw Buffy smile. "I don't think so, Xander, I - " Buffy began as she shook her head. "Go on, Buffy, dance with him," Willow said, tearing her eyes away from Oz for a moment to urge Buffy to dance with Xander. Buffy sighed and smiled as she stood up, "Sure, Xander, I'd love to dance with you." "Yes, Buffy, very enthusiastic," said Xander with a chuckle as he and she walked to the dance floor. Cordelia frowned and scrutinized Buffy's clothing like she always did. That night, she was wearing a sleeveless dress made of a chiffon material of lavender, like Cordelia had seen earlier that day in a fashion magazine. For the first time, Cordelia had no criticism and that scared her, so she turned to give Xander a look, thinking she had to find something wrong with Xander's clothes, she always did. Tonight was no exception; Xander had on all white and stood out in the crowd. Then she realized that it didn't matter that he stood out, he actually looked good! Noticing that no one knew she was alive, she followed them to the dance floor and was dying to hear their conversation. She resented that they always talked to each other, and it seemed, about everything. Xander went out on vampire patrol with Buffy far too many times than Cordelia liked. She stood idly by, close enough to hear them, but far enough so that she didn't feel weird just standing there. "So, Buffy, do I even get close to being your White Knight of your dreams?" Cordelia heard Xander say to Buffy. Cordelia remembered hearing Willow tell her about Buffy's dream of the White Knight. Willow had joked that Xander had thought that it was himself before she had even begun explaining. "Well, my White Knight did dance closer," said Buffy with a light smile, and Cordelia was shocked to see that they began to dance so close that there wasn't even air between them. "Something like this, yes, but something's missing." "That tramp, she wouldn't," said Cordelia under her breath and towards Xander she said, "That two-timing jerk, why I outta - " Despite her angry remarks, Cordelia stood her ground and waited for the scene to unfold. "You mean, this?" Xander said and then their lips met, slightly hesitant, and then they pulled away and just looked at each other. Their pounding hearts seemed to echo in Cordelia's head and just when she thought their pulses had slowed, they kissed, again, and this time even longer than before. Cordelia's jaw dropped, she had anticipated it, but she hadn't prepared for it. She was feeling very angry for two reasons. The first, Buffy and Xander, her boyfriend, had kissed each other, not once, but twice. Secondly, Xander had never kissed her like that, ever, and coming to the second reason, she sighed. A wave of depression hit her, as she realized he probably would never kiss her like that, a kiss with such passion that it meant love... ...She sat up right as she heard a knock on her door, and she walked to the door wondering who there. The crazy dream was still clear in her mind when she opened the door. She brushed her hair away from her eyes as she saw who stood in front of her, Xander Harris. "Xander, what are you doing here? Aren't you going to the dance?" asked Cordelia with a surprised tone. "No, I'm not going to the dance. What kind of an insincere boyfriend do you think I am, Cordy?" asked Xander with a laugh as he walked into her room, all the while holding a bag of rental tapes and a large bag of popcorn. "The sweet kind," said Cordelia smiling as she began to look through the various videos that he had rented and decided which one she should complain about. As they watched the movie, Cordelia still didn't feel at ease with the dream she had, although it was just a dream. She couldn't get rid of the mental picture of Xander and Buffy...kissing. Cordelia feared that it would cease to be just a dream, and would soon spill into reality. Sure, Xander was being nice and was lately being romantic and showing major concern over her, but what value did she have in Xander's heart? Was she number two or number three? The possibilities were endless, but eliminating a number out of the possibilities was easy. Cordelia knew that she could never occupy that reserved number in Xander's heart, a soft spot where Buffy would always remain, the number one. _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Tracy Cain" Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Third Child: Prologue Date: 03 Apr 1998 19:02:55 PST Name: The Third Child Author: Rihanon Address: Rihanon@hotmail.com Feedback: This is my first story, please share! Good? Bad? Ugly? I crave this information!!!!!!!! Summary: Semi-typical story, this is just the prologue, so read it yourself! Spoilers: uh- What's My Line? Definitely before S/I, though. Disclaimer: In no way am I creative enough to come up with the characters used in this story. If you recognize anything, it's not mine, and belongs to the evil Joss. Warnings: If you're anti-Buffy/Angel, delete now. A little bit of profanity, and later parts may contain more. Semi-sadistic. *grin* Rating: PG, for this part anyway. ************* The Third Child: Prologue by Rihanon ************* Buffy felt a chill wind blow through her hair as she walked through the Sunnydale night. It had been unseasonably cold recently, but Giles had decided that it was a natural occurrence, unrelated to demons, vampires, or other weird evils. Just the same, she clutched her jacket more tightly around herself as she headed towards Angel's apartment. She sighed. Four days since she had half-carried, half-dragged him there following Drucilla's less than successful ‘coming-out party.' He had recovered at an amazing rate, one of the few perks involved in being a vampire. Angel. He meant more to her than he should have, but she was through trying to deny the spark between them. The cold fear that had swept through her when she had thought him dead at Kendra's hand, and the horror of not knowing what Spike or, as it turned out, Drucilla, might be doing to him were still fresh in her memory. It seemed that she would continue to care for- no, dammit, admit it- to *love* him wether she saw him or not. And, given her probable lifespan, his presence in her life was probably the most happiness she would ever know. At least those two vampires were dead, they had creeped her out more than she would ever admit, especially to Angel. Their sire. This time her shudder had nothing to do with the temperature. Of course it hadn't been his fault, she wasn't fool enough to blame him for what the demon had done in his name, but seeing them, vampires he had made, brought it home with unusual force that he had once been one of them. Besides, it was still spooky to think of him as, to all intents and purposes, their father. Oh well. At least they were dead. ********************************************************** Spike snarled as he paced back and forth through the dingy warehouse. He could hear Drucilla humming as she amused herself by slowly killing a pair of girls she had caught in the park. A smile lit across his face as one particularly loud scream rang out, but it faded just as quickly. <*Damn* that Slayer. And damn that cursed traitor Angelus to. In the past few days it's taken dozens of lives to restore me to strength. Of course, that pansy will take even longer to heal, with his sniveling refusal to kill for the blood he needs, but that's cold comfort.> Another scream ripped through the air, accompanied by whimpering pleas and insane giggling. He raised his head as a thought occurred to him. A sadistic grin slowly spreading across his features, he left to get pen and paper. ********************************************************** Feeeedback! BegBegBegBegBegBeg... ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (2/?) by Ingrid Date: 03 Apr 1998 23:30:46 -0500 DISCLAIMER: The characters of Cordelia and Xander are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, and The Warner Brothers Network, and are used without permission. The author claims no rights to these characters. SUMMARY: Thanks to some PRESSURE from certain individuals who shall remain nameless, I'm sending out another part. Just so you know, you're all going to be held responsible for my MENTAL BREAKDOWN! Anyway... =) Welcome to my new story. This one might be a tad difficult to understand at first, since it takes place ten years into the future, and I’m not telling you what’s happened in advance. I’m going to reveal that as time goes on in the story. I love to get feedback, except when my mailbox explodes, which is often, but send it anyway! My address is Ingrid29@juno.com. If you don’t get this, that’s because you haven’t read the other part. If you want to get this, ask me for it! ********* "Reunion," by Ingrid Part Two: "Prophesies" ********* "Did you find it yet?" "Give me a second, Cordelia, I just got down here!" "Hurry!" "Okay, okay. What the hell?" "What’s the matter?" "Please tell me this is one of those large-type books." A tall, well-built man emerged from the basement door carrying a dusty book the size of a large anvil. His dark hair and eyes were striking; his features handsome. The dark relaxed jeans and tan button-down shirt made him almost unidentifiable to anyone who might have known him in high school. "Here. It’s really dusty." He placed the book on the table without a sound, sat on the chair next to her and put his head in his hands. "She’s still having the nightmares?" The brunette leafed through the heavy volume. "Yes. This is the third time she’s told me, but I suspect there have been other times." She landed on a page with particularly small print, and grabbed her wire framed glasses in order to pursue it further. "Damn. Latin. It’s definitely a discussion of the multiple interpretations of the prophecy, but this is going to take quite a while to translate." Xander stood up and patted her on the back. "Goodnight," he sighed, and turned to leave. He was nearing the bedroom door when she finally turned around. "Wait!" She stood up and walked over to where he stood. "I didn’t say I was going to translate it tonight, Xander." "I just thought-" "I know I’ve been working late lately. You’ve been great- so patient. Thank you." Her gentle smile faded. "You’d think after watching for this long, I’d be good at it." "Hey," he interrupted, pushing the long hair back from her face, "You are." She smiled again, and looked at him as if she was seeing him for the first time. Her eyes finally settled to rest on his. She touched her lips to his gently, and chuckled as he deepened the kiss and wrapped his arms around her in a bear hug. Suddenly serious, she ran her fingers along his jaw. "I love you." One of the few times she’d said it though they’d been married for a couple of years now. He knew it, but somehow the words touched him more than anything else. Perhaps it came from being a writer. Sweeping her up into his arms, he carried her from the room. She smiled, and rested her head on his chest. *** END, PART TWO. My story you like? (YODA-SPEAK) Write to me, peoples!!! (Ingrid29@juno.com) _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) Subject: BUFFYFIC: DISCUSS: You Answered My Challenge!!! Date: 03 Apr 1998 23:35:16 -0500 Everybody- I just wanted to compliment everyone who answered my challenge (to write some Willow/Angel fic). They're all interesting spins on the situation. Who knows? Maybe if I ever finish "Reunion," I'll do my own take on it! Once again, my compliments! -Ingrid Ingrid: Author of many long Buffyfics (and some short ones). "Return to Normalcy," "One Vampire's Headache...," "This Fleeting Hope," "Ghost of a Chance," "Tragic Sighs" and "Footsteps." _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Margaret Wang Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: The Dark One (6/6) Date: 03 Apr 1998 21:09:14 -0800 Please write more. I really like it and it so please don't leave me hanging! - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Anexsin Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Ties That Bind (10/10) Date: 04 Apr 1998 01:53:32 EST Title: The Ties That Bind (10/10) Author: Melinda Frango Email Addy: Anexsin@aol.com Rating: PG Spoiler: All episodes before Passion. Distribution: Ask first Feedback: Greatly appreciated. Disclaimer: Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, etc. Only the story is mine, and whatever characters never seen or mentioned on the show. Summary: Buffy and the gang get help from an unexpected source in restoring Angel's soul. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* "Hello," a perky Buffy called out as she entered the library with Willow and Xander the next morning. "You are certainly happy this morning," Giles noticed. "Well I got a good night's sleep, the first in weeks," Buffy announced. "Good for you," Giles praised. "So why are we here on a sunday, G-man," Xander asked slightly annoyed at being woken up so early on a weekend. "I told you not to call me that," Giles reprimanded. "And Caitlin asked us to meet her in the library at noon," he informed them. "Is something wrong?" Willow asked. "She didn't say, but..." Giles was cut off by the library doors opening and Caitlin walking through them. "Hi guys! Sorry I'm late, Angel was being overprotective," Caitlin smiled slightly. "Why?" Willow seemed confused. " Because I'm leaving," she announced. "Leaving, already?" Buffy questioned. "Yeah, I have places to go, things to do, a cure to find. You know the usual. I just wanted to say goodbye, and to thank you for all your help." "When do you leave?" Giles asked. "My plane leaves at 1:30, which means I need to be getting on my way." "We'll miss you," Willow informed. "Oh, don't worry, I had to pinky swear my brother that I would write, and call, and visit, frequently," Caitlin laughed. "Can we drive you to the airport?" Giles offered. "No, I'll go myself. I hate tearful goodbyes," Caitlin answered. After Caitlin hugged everyone, and said her goodbyes, she turned towards the doors to leave she stopped and turned towards the group once again. "You'll take care of him for me?" she asked hopefully. They all nodded in agreement. "He's so lucky to have found friends like you," were her last words before exiting the library. "Well, I have to get going," Buffy said. "Where?" Giles, Willow, and Xander said in unison. Buffy smiled and answered, "I'm going to see Angel. If he won't come see me, I'll go see him." "Buffy, I don't think that's such a good idea," Giles argued. "This is just something I have to do. I need to know where I stand with him,I don't expect you to understand," Buffy finished, and then left the library as well. "I hope she's doing the right thing," Willow said softly. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Buffy took deep breaths before knocking on Angel's door. "I can't do this," she whispered to herself. "Yes, I can. Get a hold of yourself, Buffy," she scolded. She took one more deep breath and knocked loudly on the door. After a moment or two she heard feet shuffling towards the door. It opened to reveal Angel wearing a thin white t-shirt, black sweatpants, and looking very sleepy. As soon as he saw who was at the door, his eyes widened in disbelief. "Buffy," he breathed. "Hi," she answered shyly. "I hope I'm not bothering you, but I'm... we really need to talk, I-I wanted to see how you were, can I come in?" she rambled. "Sure," he answered and ushered her in and shut the door. Buffy glanced around the apartment, expecting it to look different, but it comforted her knowing that it was exactly the same as the last time she was here. Angel watched Buffy as she glanced around the room, before turning towards him once again. He waited for her to speak. "So...how are you doing?" she broke the silence. "I'm getting by, I guess," he answered. "You?" "I actually slept the whole night without a nightmare," she smiled at him. He smiled in return and looked towards the ground. "I know," he said sheepishly. "I had a feeling you did," she replied. "Look Buffy, I..." "Stop!" she said sternly. "I don't want to hear apologies or excuses. You have nothing to be sorry for." "I hurt you, I hurt all of them, how can you say that?" he asked surprised. "Because it's true. It wasn't you, why can't you understand that?" "I wish I could," Angel whispered. "Why are you really here, Buffy?" "I-I..I wanted to see you," she confessed. "God, I'm so sor......" He was cut off by Buffy closing the distance between them and pressing her lips firmly against his. If he wasn't going to take the first step, she was going to take it instead. She loved him far to much to let him get lost in his guilt, aside from the fact that she wanted to be in his arms again, to revel in the fact that her Angel came back to her. She just wanted things to be like they were before. Angel was taken by surprise when Buffy kissed him, he hesitated at first then gave into her, he pulled her closer to him and deepened the kiss. It felt so good having her in his arms again he couldn't hold back. To know that she still wanted him even after everything that had happened, overwhelmed his senses. When he knew she needed air he slowly pulled away from her. Buffy kept her eyes closed and took in the feel and scent of him, then slowly opened her eyes and leaned her forehead against his. "I love you," she whispered. "I never stopped loving you," was his answer. "Hold me," she pleaded. He wrapped his arms around her instantly and held her tightly in his embrace, while she layed her head over his heart, and entwined her arms around his neck. "Are we okay?" Angel asked quietly. "You still want there to be an us?" Buffy asked hopefully. He nodded and looked deep into her eyes seeing all the love she held for him. She smiled and the tears she was holding back began to spill down her cheeks. "God, I missed you so much," she sobbed. "I missed you," he stated, while wiping away her tears. Then he went to stroking her hair, content in the fact that she had forgiven him, and continued to love him. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* End part 10....to be continued in epilouge. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Gubs Subject: BUFFYFIC: Chalenge Date: 04 Apr 1998 08:59:07 -0500 (EST) Write some fic where JOyce gets a clue abvout whats going on with buffy. I would do this myself but I am an engineering student and my writing skills are abominable. I would send my fics to the list only as perfect examples of what not to do. But anyway anyone out there whose tired of joyce being so dense. Write something where she actually grows a brain - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jaclyn Amy Subject: BUFFYFIC:Star-Cross'd Lovers(0/?) Date: 04 Apr 1998 09:22:25 EST Star-Cross’d Lovers (0/?) by Jaclyn Amy TITLE: Star-Crossed Lovers AUTHOR: Jaclyn Amy RATING: DISTRIBUTION: Ask me first. SPOILERS: None. SUMMARY: Angel is Angelus and has killed Ms. Calendar. Pretty much, this just shows how strong Angel’s and Buffy’s love is. Oh, and this isn’t your regular restoration story. This gets sad, so if you are not into that kind of thing, don’t read it. DISCLAIMER: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It is owned by Joss Wheden, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, 20th Century Fox, etc. No infringement intended. FEEDBACK: Please. Star-Cross’d Lovers (0/?) Prologue "What’s this?" Willow asked herself. It was late at night, almost so late that it was early morning. Yesterday, when subbing for the new computer teacher, she’d found a yellow disk of Ms. Calendars stuck behind the desk. She had finally gotten to look at it. "The Restoration Ceromony?" she asked aloud. As she read through it she noticed it kept refering to a vampire’s soul. //Angel? Was she going to save Angel?// It all made sense now: why she had stayed late, why the computer was trashed, why she was dead in the school. She quickly called Giles to tell him the big news. The phone rang four times when Buffy finally picked up. "Hello?" she asked, her voice unsteady. "Hey, Buffy, I have some big news for you! Can I talk to Giles for a sec?" There was a dead silence and then crying. "Buffy?" Xander’s voice suddenly came on the phone. "Will, Giles, Giles was murdered by Angel. We just came to the house and found him. Can you run over here?" The phone came loose from Willow’s hand and fell to the floor. "NO!" she screamed. "IT’S NOT TRUE." Her parents not being home, she ran as fast as she could to Giles’s. The trip seemed to take forever, though it was only a few minutes. Wild and dreary thoughts flew in and out her mind. All in all, she truly believed that they were lying to her. "Willow!" Cordelia shouted from outside the house. Willow quickly ran inside to find Giles’s mutilated corpse on the floor. Next to it was a note for Buffy, "Three down, five to go. See ya ‘round, lover." "No, no, no!" she cried. Tears flooded her face and her hands. Xander quickly embraced her. They stayed that way for an eternity, or at least it felt like that. "Where’s Buffy?" she finally spoke. "She’s gathering some of Giles things upstairs," Xander answered. Quietly, Buffy stepped down the stairs with her mother in her arms,"He’s going to kill us. He’s going to kill us all." End Prologue - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ingrid29@juno.com (Ingrid E Stanton) Subject: BUFFYFIC: "Reunion" (3/?) by Ingrid Date: 04 Apr 1998 10:16:22 -0500 DISCLAIMER: The characters of Angel, Buffy Willow, Xander, Jenny, Giles & company are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, and The Warner Brothers Network, and are used without permission. The author claims no rights to these characters. SUMMARY: This one reveals a little about the past. It doesn't totally explain things though! Welcome to my new story. This one might be a tad difficult to understand at first, since it takes place ten years into the future, and I’m not telling you what’s happened in advance. I’m going to reveal that as time goes on in the story. I love to get feedback, except when my mailbox explodes, which is often, but send it anyway! My address is Ingrid29@juno.com. If you don’t get this, that’s because you haven’t read the other parts. If you want to get this, ask me for it! ********* "Reunion," by Ingrid Part Three: "Penance" ********* Angel turned the faucet marked hot. Scalding water hit his back and he exhaled sharply. The pale skin of his shoulders was turning red, but he ignored the stinging sensation and scrubbed hard at the tattoo on his back. This was his kind of exorcism. Images of Jenny flashed before his eyes. He heard the resounding snap of her neck and the sound of her body hitting the floor. Suddenly, he felt sick to his stomach. He scrubbed harder. Willow’s pitiful expression as he’d sunk his fangs into her neck. How he had had to unlock her arms from his shoulders so that she could drop to the ground just like Jenny. Her half-drained body and those despairing eyes. Memories of pain in his chest, and the endless chanting. Then feeling dizzy. So dizzy. Xander, angry, shouting. Commanding him to do something he never would have… Under normal circumstances. He should have known better, but he’d been dizzy, and disoriented, and Xander had been screaming at him, and Willow had been crying, and so he’d done it. Blood had flowed again. She’d tasted sweet, and she’d embraced him; embraced what he was offering. But she’d been oblivious. She’d been delirious, dammit! How could he have… Acute pain as he’d sliced his wrist and tipped her head up for her to drink. She’d done everything as easily as if it she’d simply been obeying someone older and wiser. He was definitely older. She’d been delirious! He gritted his teeth in pain as he realized he’d been working at the same spot for minutes now. The skin was raw to the touch, but he couldn’t stop. It hadn’t done a thing. And the blood had tasted horrible in his mouth as something erupted in his stomach. A battle had raged inside him, and he’d collapsed. Then the fangs had disappeared forever. This should have been his dream come true, but it wasn’t. She was still a corpse in the morning. He’d been dragged to the hospital with Buffy. She’d been buried while he was recuperating. Xander forgave him now, realizing how foolhardy it had been, but glad that Angel had been willing to follow him there. Little did he know that had Angel been aware that night, instead of delusional, he would have done anything the to avoid such a plan. God, what if it had worked? He almost jumped out of his skin at the shriek of the door. Quickly coming to his senses, he shut off the faucet and grabbed a pale yellow towel from the silver rack. "Angel?" "Yeah, I’m here," he answered, his voice sounding suddenly strange to him. The afternoon sun was filtering through the blinds, filling the place with light. Angel emerged from the bathroom door to find Buffy sitting on the bed. She looked up at him gravely. "What’s the matter?" "I’m going to call Giles." ******* END, PART THREE. Some feedback each day keeps the badfic away. Write to me at Ingrid29@juno.com, please! Ingrid: Author of many long Buffyfics (and some short ones). "Return to Normalcy," "One Vampire's Headache...," "This Fleeting Hope," "Ghost of a Chance," "Tragic Sighs" and "Footsteps." _____________________________________________________________________ You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail. Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866] - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jill Kirby Subject: BUFFYFIC: Challenges Date: 04 Apr 1998 10:47:49 -0600 (CST) Just a short netiquette note regarding fiction challenges... Challenges a great way to "provoke" fiction. However, on many fiction lists it's standard that if you post a challenge, you must also post the first story of the challenge-- don't just post a challenge for Ethan and Willow fic, but post the first story dealing with E&W (this is an EXAMPLE, obviously ). This isn't a list rule, but please keep it in mind as a really good idea. Thanks. Jill Jill Kirby ~~ jtkirby@mcs.com ~~ www.geocities.com/SoHo/Lofts/4107 NatPack ~~ ABotCoS ~~ NP4 ~~ Dreamer/Minstrel ~~ CW Oh the sound of the wind through my heart Makes me glad for all the ones that never knew my name... --Jann Arden Richards - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Aglx Subject: BUFFYFIC: Lost & Found (1/?) Date: 04 Apr 1998 14:57:35 EST Lost & Found 1 Title: Vengeance (1/?) Author: Michelle E-mail: Aglx@aol.com Rating: PG-13 = violence and graphic descriptions Summary: (you'll just have to read it) Spoilers: Everything up to Killed By Death Feedback: Please, good or bad, I need to know if I suck or not. I won't care if you tell me this story is horrible, I just want to know. This story is a second series following Vengeance. This story may not make sense unless you've read Vengeance. If you want, I can e-mail you the four parts of Vengenace. I don't know how long this one will go on, it will just go until I run out of ideas! The characters of this story belong to Joss, Sandollar, WB, etc. I'm just borrowing them for my stories. This series will answer a lot of the unanswered questions left from Vengeance. PLEASE SEND FEEDBACK!!! Lost & Found (1/?) "You can walk?" "Yeah, isn't it great?" The blond vampire stood before her with an overly excited grin on his face. Buffy wasn't expecting Spike to be capable of a fight. "So, did you ask me here just to show off?" Buffy was looking for any way out of the present situation. Her friends were in danger and Spike was getting in the way. "No, actually, I called you here to fight." Spike walked slowly towards Buffy, showing off his re-aquired skills. "Well then, what are you waiting for?" "Absolutely nothing." Buffy awoke to the sound of her stomach. She hadn't eaten anything in days and was starved. She quietly got out of bed making sure not to disturb Xander. He was right about one thing, as a vampire, he was much more attractive to Buffy. She walked down the cold metal stairs dressed in a long silk black gown. It was day and vampires laid scattered around the warehouse floor. Across the room she saw a lone vampire curled up on the ground. Buffy sat down next to him and carressed his arm. Before he could wake, she sunk her teeth into his neck. She had learned that the blood of a vampire tasted greater than any blood she had ever had. Satisfied, Buffy headed back to bed. Years had passed since Buffy became a vampire and she was haunted day and night by all the unconcible things she had done. Drusilla wanted her to suffer, and she did. She killed her family, her friends, everyone. The memory of their deaths was constantly on her mind. Weeks after Buffy became a vampire, she tracked down Cordelia and Oz and transformed them. Cordelia was killed in battle against Kendra over a year ago. Cordelia just never had the heart to be a vampire. Buffy awoke suddenly to the memories of death in her mind. She could feel that sun down was near. She clawed through the closet until she found a beautiful blue dress to wear. After she finished getting dressed, Buffy woke Xander with a kiss. The two headed downstairs where Willow and Oz were already eating. "We may be better off if you two would stop eating other vampires," Drusilla said as Angel carried her down the stairs. The two looked up for a second but then returned to their meals. "I guess they don't care, Dru." Buffy took every chance she got to attack Drusilla. Even as a vampire, Buffy hated her. Angel placed Drusilla down on her own two feet. "Did you sleep well last night, Buffy?" "I think you know the answer to that," Buffy said as she glared at Drusilla