From: "Ian and Tiff" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Moonlight Chat - 1/1 by Tiffany Date: 02 Nov 1998 14:59:35 -0800 Title: Moonlight Chat - 1/1 Author: Tiffany Gregg E-Mail: iangr@msn.com Distribution: It'll be at my site. If you'd like it for yours, just let me know please. Rating: PG-13 Spoiler Warning: none Feedback: Would be most appreciated Classification: BSR Summary: Spike and Buffy walk home from the Bronze and talk. Disclaimer: The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, FOX and Mutant Enemy. I am making no money in writing this and no copyright infringement is intended. Authors note: This is the 5th part in my "Masquerade" series. The previous parts can be found at my site http://www.thegreggs.com/fanfic.htm ========== Moonlight Chat By: Tiffany E-Mail me at: iangr@msn.com The moon shone high over head as Spike walked Buffy home from the Bronze. Spike looked over at the girl walking beside him and sighed to himself. The moonlight danced across her face, illuminating her perfect features and making her eyes twinkle like the stars. Buffy looked over at Spike and smiled. "You're staring." "Sorry Pet can't help myself." he replied giving her a lopsided grin. "When I look at you, I...well, I just...I can't explain it. Never mind." he added in a rush and looked away. Buffy stopped and turned Spike so they were facing one another. "Please, Spike. Try and explain it. Please?" She put her hand on his cheek and he instinctively nuzzled into her palm. "I want to understand you. I need to. If we're going to make a go of what ever this is we're doing, we need to be honest with one another." Spike closed his eyes, took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. When he opened his eyes he found Buffy looking up expectantly at him. Unable to deny her anything, he resigned. "Okay, Luv, you win...when I look at you it's like, well, it's like basking in the sunlight on a summers day. You light up the dark places inside of me, Slayer." "You sure know how to make a girls heart swoon." she replied smiling broadly at him. The smile on Buffy's lips fell abruptly when she noticed that he was not returning the gesture. "What is it? What's wrong?" she asked hesitantly. "I wasn't finished, Luv." "Sorry." she replied sheepishly. "Please finish." "Sometimes when I look at you" Spike paused briefly, "I am ashamed of what I am, of the things I've done. I have always enjoyed being a vampire, the thrill of the hunt and all that rot you know. But the kill, I just don't enjoy it the way I use to. Bloody hell, I've even left my last three victims alive!" Buffy gently stroked his cheek with her hand and looked him in the eyes. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think that you were growing a soul." she said softly. "Not bloody likely, Pet." he snorted back at her. Buffy couldn't help but giggle at the indignant expression on his face. Seeing the laughter light her eyes, Spike could contain the urge to hold her no longer. He quickly pulled Buffy into his arms and kissed her passionately before trailing tiny kisses across her jaw and down her neck to her collarbone. He nuzzled his face against her neck and groaned "Do you know what you do to me, Slayer? Do you know how you make me feel?" "No, but if it's anything like how I feel when I'm near you...." she stopped and blushed a brilliant shade of red. Spike captured her lips once again. This time sweeping his tongue past her lips and gently caressing hers. He snaked one hand up behind her to caress the back of her neck. His other arm went around her waist and pulled her in tightly against him. Pulling back from the embrace Spike said "Well, Pet, we best be getting you home before your mum starts to worry." Buffy was momentarily taken aback by the love and longing shining back at her in his eyes. She took his hands and smiled "I'm in no hurry. Maybe we could go to your place for a while?" "Anything to make you happy, Luv." "Anything?" she questioned with a glint of mischief in her eyes. "Anything." he stated as calmly as he could. His heart and mind were racing trying to figure out exactly what she meant by 'anything'. He gave her hand a little squeeze and started down the street to his place. He had a feeling that this would be night to remember. ========== The End. (Masquerade Series - part 5) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: sah Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN: List rules Date: 03 Nov 1998 18:02:10 -0500 (EST) Welcome! This list is for fiction related to "Buffy The Vampire Slayer," both the TV series and the movie. To ensure that we all get to enjoy as much fiction as possible, please adhere to the following guidelines, and please save them for future reference. 1. Fiction should have Buffy characters in it and clearly be related to Buffy. 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Jill Kirby (jtkirby@mcs.com) & sah (romana@mindspring.com) Listowners, Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fiction List buffyfic@xmission.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: sah Subject: BUFFYFIC: ADMIN: How to (un)s*bscribe Date: 03 Nov 1998 18:02:07 -0500 (EST) Please SAVE this message-- it contains information on how to uns*bscribe from the list or to change s*bscription options. IF YOU'RE S*BSCRIBED TO THE REGULAR BUFFY LIST AND WISH TO CHANGE TO DIGEST: You need to uns*bscribe from the Buffy list, and res*bscribe to the digest. Send a message to majordomo@lists.xmission.com In the body of the message, put uns*bscribe buffy Then, send a second message to majordomo@lists.xmission.com In the body of the message, put s*bscribe buffy-digest You'll go through the same approval process that you got when you subbed to the regular Buffy list. If you're s*bscribed to the digest version, and want to change to regular mail, do the opposite-- unsub from buffy-digest, and resub to buffy. THE BUFFY FICTION LIST To s*bscribe to the Buffy Fiction list, follow the same procedures as listed above-- just substitute buffyfic or buffyfic-digest for buffy or buffy-digest. TO UNS*BSCRIBE FROM ANY BUFFY LIST send a message to majordomo@lists.xmission.com In the body of the message put uns*bscribe buffy (or buffy-digest, or buffyfic, or buffyfic-digest) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ Subject: BUFFYFIC: SpikeFic: Paying the Piper (1/5) Date: 04 Nov 1998 21:45:29 -0500 Title: Paying the Piper (1/5) Author: ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ a.k.a. Goth Spike E-mail: ripe_wicked_plum@hotmail.com Feedback: "Do you like it, Baby?" Distribution: Spike's Spike, Spike Girls, all others, please ask first. Rating: R (graphic violence and language) Spoilers: Through DMP Summary: Xander does wrong and must pay the price. Just so happens, Spike is the bill collector. Includes my version of DMP. Disclaimer: All things Buffy belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, Sanddollar, Kuzui, the WB, et al. I own nothing but the combination of words I use to tell the story. Notes: Xander fans beware! This fic comes in response to Kyra's challenge to make Xanderboy suffer. Thanks for thinking me worthy of it! "She came home today," he said to the back of the head. "When?" the blonde asked. "A little after one. She went straight to her mother's." "Leave me," the other responded, standing up. "But-" "Oh, right, you want your money," Spike said, turning around. "Here," he continued, crossing the room and putting several hundred dollars into the trembling palm of the nervous man before him. "Now leave." The smaller man took it, counted it, and turned to leave, only halted by the clipped British voice. "Oh, and, Willie, talk and I'll-" "Have my 'guts for garters'. I know the drill, Spike. Besides," he said, pocketing the cash, "who am I going to tell?" Spike once again turned his back to Willie and heard his footsteps grow fainter and fainter. He walked over to the bed and paced before it, glaring at the decor of the room. The sparse nature of his surroundings disturbed him. It dripped of Angelus. He walked down the hall, knocking over the statues and vases that Angelus had treasured so much. He chuckled to himself as he heard them shatter on the hard, marble floor. He turned a corner and readied himself for the sights ahead. He hadn't been in this part of the house in months. He stepped off of the hard floor and onto the carpet, entering the room where Angelus had tortured the librarian. He paused for a moment before parting the curtain. He stepped into the next room and saw Acathla; the demon that Angelus had promised would end the world. His mind drifted back to that morning. He remembered the absolute joy he felt as he beat his sire to near unconsciousness. He had landed several good blows before he'd been interrupted by Drusilla. A smile played at his lips as he remembered the elation he'd felt. The last time he felt that way in months. "Didn't work out quite like you planned, eh, Angelus?" he said to the empty room. "You weren't countin' on 'Roller-boy' to switch sides, were you?" He reached out and touched the stone demon. "Man, do I wish I could 'ave seen the look on your face when she ran the two of you through." The 'she' he spoke of was Buffy. Spike had come back to Sunnydale only a few days after leaving and found the Slayer gone and her friends sitting ducks. Many nights he had watched them hunt his kind down only to fail miserably at staking their foes. More often than not, he had to stifle laughter while watching them. He almost felt sorry for the Scooby Gang. After all, they were just normal kids. They didn't have the strength or the technique required to do the job. He had to give them credit, though; they were at least trying to fill in for the Slayer. Spike wondered where she was. Ever since their truce, he had found himself thinking about her more often than he cared to admit. The thoughts had grown more frequent since Dru left. Dru hadn't understood that he had done it for her. Drusilla never understood that everything he did was for her. She wasn't able to see the big picture. All that mattered to her was the moment. She only cared that 'Daddy' wasn't around anymore. A smile crossed his lips as he thought of his sire writhing in Hell. "That'll teach you, Angelus," he said, "I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen to me. Someone always gets hurt. Love'll kill you." He still didn't know exactly what had happened after he left. All he knew was that Buffy had managed to kill the love of her life and saved the world from destruction. He had visited her mother and found out that Buffy had run away. He had almost killed Joyce right then and there. She had given Buffy no choice but to run away. The silly git had told her not to come back if she left. Spike wouldn't blame her if she never came back to Sunnydale. He knew she would, though. No matter how hard she thought fighting demons was, it was nothing compared to fighting them alone. No family. No friends. No hope. Take all that away and what's left? Emptiness. Depression. Grief. She would be back. He had counted on it. Today was the day. So the Slayer was back in town. He wondered how she would react to him. He didn't want to go back to being the hunter. Or was he the hunted? He didn't know anymore. He didn't care, either. He just wanted for her to look at him as more than an enemy. He wanted to look into those big eyes of hers and see acceptance. He knew she was capable of it, after all, she had loved Angelus. No she hadn't. She had loved Angel, not Angelus. She would never accept him without a soul. "You know, some girls want a guy with a BMW. Me, I 'ave t' fall for the one who expects a bloody soul. What is it with you, Spike? First it's crazy girls, now it's Slayers. When are you goin' to learn? Time to start practicin' what you preach. Just kill the bitch and be done with it," he said, casting a glance over his shoulder as he left the room. ~Ripe Wicked Plum~ -- Goth Spike/ICQ=2607806/Spike Girls/Spike4Sexiest/Spike's Minions/Spuffy/Spike's Sweeties (#2)/SOOA[Major General (#5)]/I'm Spike's Ducks/ Spikemania(I cherish Spike's chest)/Red Candy VP/Pres. and founder of the Leo is a Bloody Whelp Club/Keeper of Spike's terms of endearment and his gloves/Guardian of Spike's humanity, his amusement at Buffy's Hallowe'en costume, and his ability to swallow his pride and help Buffy ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Ian and Tiff" Subject: BUFFYFIC: Mirror, Mirror... - 1/1 by Tiffany Date: 05 Nov 1998 07:56:29 -0800 Title: Mirror, Mirror... - 1/1 Author: Tiffany Gregg E-Mail: iangr@msn.com Distribution: It'll be at my site. If you'd like it for yours, just let me know please. Rating: PG-13 (Special edited edition) Spoiler Warning: nothing really Feedback: Would be most appreciated Classification: BSR (with some angst) Summary: Buffy and Spike make with the smoochies, but... Disclaimer: The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, FOX and Mutant Enemy. I am making no money in writing this and no copyright infringement is intended. Authors note: This is the 6th part in my "Masquerade" series. The previous parts can be found at my site http://www.thegreggs.com/fanfic.htm (well, part 5 isn't quite there yet). Also, this series takes place after BatB and is a bit of an alternate Buffy-verse. ALSO NOTE: This story has been edited from the original format that was posted to BBETA so that it would fit the requirements (PG-13 cap) for the BUFFYFIC list. ========== Mirror, Mirror... By: Tiffany E-Mail me at: iangr@msn.com Spike slowed as they approached an abandoned warehouse. "Just bloody terrific" he muttered stopping in his tracks. Buffy looked up and saw Spike's minions milling around the building. "Well, Slayer looks like you won't be getting a tour tonight." he said with a shrug. Buffy thought for a moment. "We could go back to my house?" she suggested hopefully. "I don't think your mum would be too glad to see me, Pet." he replied seriously. "She's out of town on another one of her buying tours for the gallery." Spike's eyes glinted with mischief. "Well, then. What are we waiting for, Luv?" Buffy closed the door behind them quickly when they reached her house and threw herself into his arms. Their mouths hungrily devouring one another, tongues dueling, hands roaming. "Spike, I want you to make love to me." the words were simple and spoken so softly that he doubted a mortal could have heard them. "You're sure, Slayer?" For an answer, Buffy took his hand and headed up the stairs to her bedroom. Helpless to resist, Spike followed. Each step closer filling him with excitement and a touch of uncertainty. This is what he'd dreamt of for so many months and his dream was about to come true. The Slayer wanted him. Wanted him as much as he wanted her. Once inside her room, Buffy's bravado seemed to desert her and she stared at Spike with uncertainty in her wide eyes. "We don't have to do this, Pet." Spike said to try and calm her fears. "No, I want to." Buffy said quickly and then added with a blush, "It's just, well, I just, um, don't really know where to start." Spike stifled a laugh and pulled her into his arms. As he held her in his arms he could feel her shaking. Was it from nervousness or excitement he wondered. "Slayer." he murmured as he found her lips and kissed her passionately. Buffy responded to his kiss with spirit, pressing her body into his and circling his neck with her arms. Spike placed tiny kisses all along her jaw and neck. Buffy groaned low in her throat as she felt his tongue lap at her collarbone. "Ah, Slayer. Do you know how long I have dreamt of holding you? Of this very moment?" Buffy looked up into his eyes, they were filled with passion, longing and.....love. She couldn't surpress the smile that lit her face. He wanted her and loved her. Everything felt so right. She pulled his head down to hers and captured his mouth with her own. Her tongue plundering his mouth even as her hands deftly worked the buttons on his shirt. Buffy slid her hands up his smooth, sculpted chest and over his strong shoulders, sending his shirt quickly to the floor. Spike backed Buffy gently towards the bed and she froze and stiffened in his arms. He pulled back and looked down at her. She was staring at something across the room. Buffy felt her breath catch in her throat. She felt as if time was standing still. There in the mirror she could see herself, face flushed with passion. But Spike, who stood right beside her cast no reflection. Memories and emotions came flooding back to her. Vampire. Demon. The words echoed in her mind. She closed her eyes to try and stop them, but they came anyway. Memories of Angel and that same mirror. How could she have let herself get so swept up in her emotions that she could have forgotten that Spike was a blood-thirsty fiend? Spike watched the blood drain from Buffy's face until she was white as a sheet. "What is it?" he asked "What's wrong, Pet?" Then he followed her gaze to the mirror where only her wide blue eyes stared back at him with apprehension and confusion. Buffy unconsciously took a step back. Spike reached out a hand to her and she flinched away. Spike didn't miss the significance of her reaction and bristled. "You know what I am." he said in a cold, defensive voice. "I know." she said in a small voice. "It just startled me a little. It's okay, really. I guess I just forgot." Spike sighed "This isn't going to work, Slayer. I should have known that. I was stupid to think that you could look past what I am to see who I really am." "No, really. It's okay." Buffy said almost in tears. Spike reached out to touch her cheek and she flinched back again. Spike dropped his hand back to his side and clenched his fist. He felt a white hot fury building up inside his gut. Grabbing his shirt off the floor, he fled out of her room, out of her house, out of her life and back into the night. The night that seemed so much darker to him now. Blood red tears ran down his face and as he ran through the night he screamed with all the fury and heartbreak in his being. Back in her room, Buffy sat on the floor with her knees pulled up to her chin and slowly rocked herself back and forth. Tears streaming down her face she wondered what had just happened. Spike was a demon, a bad guy. Why did she keep forgetting that? Even more confusing, if he was her enemy why was he so kind to her. She was sure that it was love she saw in his eyes. She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. Maybe it was time to talk to Giles? ========== The End. (Masquerade Series - part 6) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Leslie S." Subject: BUFFYFIC: Little Mall of Horrors (1/1) Date: 05 Nov 1998 09:01:17 PST TITLE: Little Mall of Horrors (1/1) AUTHORS: LilS, Tay, Stinger-J EMAIL: leslie_s_@hotmail.com DISTRIBUTION: My pitiful fanfic site. http://beavis.bwave.com/~lilsprout/fanfic.html But if anyone wants it, just let me know and it shall be yours!!! RATING: PG SPOILERS: Sort of "Homecomimg" but not really SUMMARY: Cordelia goes shopping dragging Xander along with her. DISCLAIMER: Characters are borrowed from Joss Whedon and crew, as well as from some folks at the BBC. No infringement is intended. FEEDBACK: is a good thing. But no pressure! NOTE: This round robin fic was spawned one evening due to the fact that our real-time on-line Buffy role playing game was cancelled due to real life happenings. Great literature it ain’t, but we had fun doing it. If you are interested in Buffy chat or want more info on joining our role-playing group, please check out http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Shores/4145/ ***** It was Homecoming. One of Cordy’s favorite times of the year. Especially since she just knew that she would be named Homecoming Queen. Although she was dating Xander Harris, she was confident enough that she would have the votes. SO confident in fact that it called for a trip to the mall. A new dress was in order. She decided to bring Xander along in hopes of forcing him into buying a new suit that looked like he hadn’t picked it off the rack! So with thoughts of a Homecoming victory in her head, Cordy jumped into her BMW and sped off to pick up Xander. So Cordy dragged a reluctant Xander off to the mall. "But I don't NEED a new suit! What's wrong with the one I have?" Xander asked. "Well, first of all, the jacket is pale blue, secondly, the pants are plaid. We are NOT going to the dance with you looking like that!" "Yeah, well..." Xander began. "What if they theme Homecoming for the 70s?" Cordy merely glared at him and swung her car into a smaller-than-average spot at the mall. It was definitely crowded for a Saturday, but in the burgh like Sunnydale, where else is there to be? Cordy swung her door open, dinging the Dodge Dart next to her without a care in the world while Xander tried to squeeze out carefully next to the VR6 Golf on his side. "Cor?" he asked. "Just how am I to pay for a new suit? I'm in highschool!!" "Don’t worry about the money. I have daddy’s platinum card. He won’t even notice the charges with all I have to buy today." Xander groaned. He decided that he would rather spend the day with Giles cross referencing. This "little" shopping trip was gonna earn him some serious closet time. Before they entered the mall, Cordy clued him in her mall strategy. "First we have to go to Sax for the dress. That should take about 2 hours. Then another 40 to 45 minutes in the shoe department…." Xander groaned again as Cordy described her plan in detail, taking up Xander's entire day. But being the faithful boyfriend, into the fray he went. Besides, he didn't have to pay for anything, so it couldn't be too bad. After Cordy had been looking at dresses for about 45 minutes, Xander found himself staring at the watch section of the store as the seconds of his life ticked by as Cordy tried on dress after dress. As Xander tuned out Cordy's frivolous debate on dress, he started humming "Girl from Ipanema" as it was broadcasted over the store PA system. "Xander? What do you think of this one? Xander? Xanderrr!" "Hmm hmm hm hm, the girl from Ipanema goes walking....huh? Oh! oh, yeah yeah it's fine Cor...really, ah… " He started looking closer at the dress. "Cor?" "What? Does it make me look fat?! What?!" "Is there a storage closet nearby?" Cordy gave Xander a glare that would have frozen the Colorado Hot Springs. "Xander….this is important. I have to look my best. And all you can think about is finding a closet and making out?" Xander swallowed hard. "Um …uh……" He decided in this case that honesty might actually get him out of the doghouse. "You look really hot in that dress. And well….just call me hormone boy OK?" Cordy gave him another dubious look. Before she could say anything, Xander backed up a few feet wondering if maybe he was pushing his luck. Cordy took another look at herself in the mirror before turning back to Xander. "Cordy, trust me, you look really great!" Cordy turned and smiled at Xander. "Really?" Than she whispered in his ear, "Lemme pay for this, than we'll go find that closet." Cordy kept the dress on, paying for it with her daddy's credit card. The two left the store and found a little hall that looked like it might lead to a broom closet or something, away from the crowds of the mall. Xander let Cordy lead him down the little hall like the boyfriend he was. She quickly found a door marked Nine West Storage....(Nine West makes nice shoes if'n ya didn't know.) "Quick, in here," she said and dragged him inside. Xander and Cordy proceeded to engage in quite the long and drawn out "make out" session. (Well, to be honest to you the reader, there was a bit of groping included and....Well, I'll be even more honest....Bill and Monica would be embarrassed by what these kids did! However, on the plus side, Cordy found a pair of pumps in her size that she took as a lovely parting gift. ) Cordy took a look at her watch. The were two hours behind schedule!!!! But what a "two hours" it was! "Now back to business Xander. Come on. We need to go to the Men’s Department at Neimens." After they entered the men’s department, a tallish gentleman with a balding head and mustache walked up to them and asked if he could be of assistance. "My boyfriend needs a suit to go with this dress that won’t make him look like a loser." The man nodded and called for a sales assistant. "Mr. Humphries, are you free?" "I'm freeeeee!!!" Xander marveled as the most awkward gentleman virtually pranced over to where he and Cordy stood. "And what can I get for the gentleman?" Xander was ready to quip something nasty back, but Cordy promptly stamped his foot and interrupted. "We need to find him something to match this dress, it's for homecoming and trust me I don't plan on losing. Anyway we need to fix him up with something that won't let him look like the loser he pretty much is." "Well," Mr Humphries said doing that little crossed-arm thing he did when he was contemplating, "I think something in a tan double breasted suit would fit him perfectly!" A look of concern washed over Cordelia’s face. "This won’t be off-the-rack will it?" Mr. Humphries patted her on the arm. "Don’t worry dearie, we’ll fix him up all pretty for you." Now a look of concern washed over Xander’s face. Mr. Humphries took hold of Xander’s arm and lead him behind a partition to take his measurements. Cordelia waited patiently. A few moments later she heard Xander cry out. Being Sunnnydale, she grabbed a stake out of her purse and darted behind the partition. Cordy swung around the partition, stake in hand, in time to see Mr. Humphries rolling up his measuring tape and Xander with still a very startled look on his face. "Thirty two inch inseam, just as I guess," he said and walked past Cordy muttering a quiet "lucky girl" as he passed. Cordy looked blankly as he passed and then, putting her stake away, turned back to Xander. "Well, that had to be an experience," and snickered. It was Xander's turn to glare. "You better stay near the dressing rooms at this rate," he said and walked back out into the department. As Xander brushed past her, she thought she heard Xander mutter something like "related to Larry", but she was too busy staring at the woman with purple hair over at the Ladies Counter to take any real notice. Cordy chatted a few moments with Mr. Humphries to make sure the suit would be ready in time for the dance. Once she was satisfied it would be, she grabbed Xander and headed on to the next store. Xander looked on in horror as he saw their next destination. It was No-man’s Territory. As he struggled against her grip, Xander resigned himself to his fate. He was being dragged into an accessory store! Xander bravely endured the attack of the accessories that Cordy threw at him. From lapel pins to cuff links, from a gaggle of earrings to necklaces of every length, they must have spent a good two hours here as well. Before long, Xander stomach possessed him and he turned into Cro-Xander, dragging his woman off to the food court for dinner. Xander feasted on an upsized value meal from McDonalds while Cordy simply picked on a salad. "You did good today Xander." "Well it really wasn’t all that bad." Xander replied as he remembered their time in the shoe closet. "I might even consider doing it again, he stated thinking it might again gain him some closet time." "Don’t worry Xander. There will be plenty of other chances?" Xander tried to mask his horror. "Wha…what do you mean _other_ chances?" "Let’s see. After homecoming, there’s the Fall Fling, the Christmas Dance, the Spring Fling, the………" Again Xander groaned and resigned himself to his fate. Besides as long as there were closets at the mall, he’d let Cordelia drag him shopping. ~End~ ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Samantha McCullah Subject: BUFFYFIC: That Stupid Jerk (1/1) Date: 05 Nov 1998 18:41:20 -0600 TITLE: That Stupid Jerk (1/1) AUTHOR: Samantha McCullah EMAIL: ankhet@cswnet.com DISTRIBUTION: Just keep my name attached SPOILERS: Homecoming CONTENT: angst RATING: PG-13 SUMMARY: Willow contemplates Xander DISCLAIMER: If I owned them, do you think I'd still be writing fanfic? Joss owns 'em, not me. The poem quoted is owned by Maggie Estep words in << >> are parts of the poem ------------------------ That Stupid Jerk (1/1) by Samantha McCullah He kissed me. Eleven years of knowing him, ten years of loving him, and he finally kisses me. He kisses me just when I'm finally in a relationship I like that's not with some demon. I could kill him. I really could. <> Why couldn't we have kissed before? Before Buffy, or Oz, or Cordy, or anyone else, but no, he kisses me now before my first Homecoming dance with a guy that's not Xander. I don't know whether to scream or cry, and usually when I'm feeling like this, I call Xander. But I can't. <> I want to know why I'm so confused all of a sudden. I was *so* over Xander last year when I started dating Oz. When I caught him and Cordy together, kissing. Just like he kissed me. I still don't know what he sees in her. We've hated Cordy for years, and we even formed a 'We Hate Cordelia' club. He's changed her, though. She's actually, dare I say it?, nice. <> He doesn't know I heard him the hospital. I heard him say 'I love you', but I didn't want to believe he'd actually said it. I wanted so much to believe that it had been Oz that said it. But no, it was Xander. All it took was for me to nearly die, and suddenly he loved me. All it took was a change of clothing, and suddenly he kissed me. Sometimes, Xander can be a real idiot. <> I need to tell someone, anyone. But I can't tell Oz or Cordy or Xander, obviously, and Buffy has enough problems so I'm left alone to try and work out my feelings. I can't even tell my parents because they never approved of Oz in the first place. What am I gonna do? <> Maybe I'll go find a vamp to beat up to work out my frustrations. Maybe I just need to sleep on it. Yeah a good night's sleep. Maybe I'll dream of Oz and not Xander. I hope. <> What am I gonna do? *Fin* ------------------ Feedback is appreciated! Also if anyone wants a complete copy of the poem, just email me. Sam "It's a human trait, remembering things the way we wish they'd been. We rewrite history so that we can live with it. You ask the Russians. Or come to that, ask the Americans or the British." -- Methos Unholy Allies -- http://roswell.fortunecity.com/gypsy/190/index.html Do you have any Buffy/Spike fanfic? Send it to ankhet@cswnet.com and I'll put in the above archive. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: sasheer@mailexcite.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: If You'd Listen Date: 06 Nov 1998 14:00:59 PST TITLE: If You’d Listen AUTHOR: Alex Queirolo E-MAIL: Treycash1@yahoo.com FAN-FIC SITE: http://www.angelfire.com/co/alexfic/index.html SUMMARY: The missing Angel scenes from TED SPOILERS: Um, TED. Oh ya..and What’s My Line. RATING: PG. Angst. A couple bad words. DISCLAIMER: The characters are not mine. Joss is god. The situations are. I am not god. DEDICATION: To Leona for putting me up. To my sis just because. And to Lex cuz she asked for it. And to my friends on the board cuz you rock. MUSICAL SELECTIONS: Runaway Train by Soul Asylum, Background by Third Eye Blind and Let the Sun Fall Down by Kim Richey. The title hails from Nero’s Rome. FURTHER AUTHOR’S NOTES: The first section takes place after Buffy gets grounded, the second after the “death” of Ted and the third after the real death of Ted. FEEDBACK: Please. “Bought a ticket for a runaway train Like a mad man laughing at the rain A little out of touch, little insane It’s just easier than dealing with the pain.” He was lying on his bed reading when she stepped through the door into his small apartment. Her first thought as her blue eyes settled on his muscular form was that the book he held in his hand looked old. The pages were a dull yellow and looked painfully brittle. How ironic. He glanced up from his original edition of Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet” when he heard the door click shut. He was about to casually toss off a warm greeting to his beautiful girlfriend but stopped cold when he saw the look on her face. A million things at once. Confusion. Fear. Anger. Sadness. Something was wrong and it showed in the dark shadows surrounding her eyes. Moaning softly, Angel started to sit up, intending to go to her. It still hurt to move but she was worth the pain. She never gave him the chance. She moved quickly across the room and propelled herself into his arms. Immediately, he wrapped an arm around her and began to lightly stroke her back. He could feel her nuzzling herself against his chest, her delicate arms winding around his waist. “Buffy, honey..what’s wrong?” Angel asked softly, planting a soft kiss on top of her blonde head. He slipped a hand under her shirt and began to gently knead the tense muscles he felt there. “Ted,” Buffy Summers muttered, closing her eyes and pressing her face into the meat of his shoulder. Normally she would have laid her head against his chest but even as upset as she quite obviously was, she was still mindful of his recent injuries. “Ah,” Angel nodded thoughtfully. “Ted. What happened?” He wove the hand that wasn’t beneath her shirt into her blonde hair and started gently playing with it, moving the strands between his fingers. He’d once gotten her to fall asleep in his arms by playing with her hair and while that wasn’t exactly the angle he was aiming for now, any degree of relaxation and calm would be welcome. “He’s a creep,” Buffy said petulantly, moaning softly as his hand went to work on easing a particularly painful knot of muscle in her upper back. She arched against it, her eyes falling shut. “Go on,” he urged softly, his voice almost too low to be heard. He pressed his thumb into the muscle and moved it in a slow hard circle, smiling grimly when she cried out again. She was caught in between absolute agony and sheer ecstasy. Moving his digit in closer, he worked on coaxing the knot loose. “He’s gonna marry my mom,” Buffy said bitterly. “God, Angel..he’s crazed. Like Stepfather crazed.” Angel lifted an eyebrow,” I don’t follow.” She waved a hand absently and then moaned again as the knot finally began to loosen under Angel’s constant assault. “It was a movie about a stepfather who was a psychotic serial killer.” “And you think that’s Ted?” Angel asked her gently, not wanting her to think he was making fun of her. “Well maybe.” Buffy said, her lower lip protruding. “He’s definitely psycho but mom’s all ‘ooh Ted’. Yuck. It’s not normal.” “Buffy..” “No!” Her head shot up from his shoulder and she wrenched away from him, whimpering softly at the pain in her back. Shaking her head, she stared back at him. “You don’t understand. The way my mom acts is like a trained golden retriever.. not like someone in love. It’s suddenly like he owns her.” “Love makes you do the wacky. You told me that,” Angel reminded her, reaching out to pull her back into his arms. She shook her head forcefully. “She’s not in love with him. It’s not possible.” She looked up at Angel and saw the soft sympathetic smile he was giving her. Immediately she pushed herself away from him again and began to pace angry circles in front of his bed, looking deeply troubled. “Buffy, talk to me.” Angel urged, stepping towards her. “He said he was gonna hit me, Angel. And he meant it. He got all power-pissed because he caught me cheating at mini-golf and he said he was gonna hit me.” “What?” Angel said sharply, his body tensing. Her narrowed his eyes dangerously and made a low growling noise in the back of his throat. She seemed oblivious to his change in demeanor however because she continued her agitated pacing. “And when I told mom, she didn’t believe me! I mean..how fucked up is that? Let’s see here; big ugly creepy guy or daughter. There’s a fairly tough one there. You know what, I think I’m gonna hafta go with the one that cooks. On second thought mom, great choice..” Angel reached out and grabbed her arm, spinning her out of her angry stride. “Buffy, calm down and talk to me. Did he hit you? Has he touched you?” “No, no, no,” Buffy replied, shaking her head. “No, he hasn’t hit me or tried to..yet. But in the meanwhile, I’m the bad child and I can’t talk to my dad because he’s happy that mom’s happy.” She threw up her hands. “God, this sucks.” He took her hand in his and pressed a kiss to it. Then he pulled her into his arms and settled her head beneath his chin. He winced as her body settled against the healing flesh of his exposed chest. She opened her mouth to protest but was quickly silenced by the softness of his lips pressing against hers. She let out a soft throaty moan and then wrapped herself around him. It was he that finally broke the passionate embrace. “It’s okay,” he promised. “Your mom is a smart woman. She won’t let anyone get away with hurting you.” “Ted touches me and I’ll kill him,” Buffy grunted, a half-smile perking her upper lip. “He touches you, I’ll eat him,” Angel replied, kissing her nose. She giggled but didn’t dissuade him and it wasn’t long before that too became lips on lips in a manner that would have put the Hoover vacuum cleaner to shame. “Mmm,” Buffy murmured, finally breaking away albeit reluctantly. “I have to get home.” She slipped her hands up against his cool skin and then rested her head against him, allowing him to breathe in the smell of strawberry shampoo. She felt him shiver as she ran her small fingers across the tattoo. For some bizarre reason, it was a major “yes” spot for him. “Do you have to?” Angel whispered, lowering his head to gently nibble on her ear. Closing his eyes, he took in both the taste of her in his mouth and the feel of her soft hands against his back. She chuckled lightly before turning around and then standing on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips. “Technically I’m grounded.” His eyes shot open,”Why?” She shrugged, “I told mom and the Evil Bastard that I’d want to kill myself if they got married.” “Buffy..” “I know, I know. But Angel, believe me…this guy is no Mr..Mr. Brady. He’s loco in the cabasa.” He ran a hand over her cheek. “I’m sorry you have to deal with this.” When his fingers reached her mouth, she kissed the tips. “It’ll be okay,” Buffy assured him, suddenly unwilling to let him worry about her. He had enough problems to deal with. Especially since he had been kidnapped by Spike and Dru. Sighing, she said softly, “I have to go.” “I know,” Angel replied sadly, tracing a finger across her jawline. He wished he could pull her back into his arms and just wrap her tightly in his embrace. “But do me a favor, okay?” She lifted an eyebrow but never hesitated, “Anything.” “Stop by here in the morning. Just..just so I know you’re okay. And..” he smiled shyly, looking very much like a little boy. “Just so I can go to sleep happy.” She blushed and then nodded. “I’ll drop by before I go to school. “Reaching up, she pressed her lips to his once again and then deepened the kiss. Closing her eyes, she allowed herself to relax into the passionate embrace. So much in fact that she barely felt him walk her over to the bed. “You’re so tense, Buffy.” He whispered, his hands once again sliding beneath her shirt. He saw her nod her agreement so he smiled. “We’ll fix that and then you can go home, okay?” She chuckled,”You’re the man with the hands.” This section takes place after the “death” of Ted. “And I'm hanging on your words like I always used to do, The words they use so lightly, I only feel for you” By nine-thirty A.M., he was pacing nervously. Anxious and agitated and needing sleep desperately, he continued to rhythmically clench and unclench his fists. And even as it threatened to shut down, his mind continued to pour over the possibilities. Perhaps she had merely slept in. He could still clearly recall the dark circles that had been lurking beneath her bright blue eyes when she’d come to see him the previous night. Things hadn’t been easy for the little Slayer as of late. For any of them really but Buffy had the bad habit of taking everything upon herself. Which naturally made her run herself into the ground. So it made some kind of sense that she might hit the snooze button on her alarm and snuggle back into the soft pillows of her bed. Only Joyce would never let Buffy sleep in on a school morning. He knew for certain because the tiny blonde Slayer was always bitching about it. If Buffy wasn’t in the kitchen by a quarter to eight at the latest, then she would be removed from the bed. Forcibly if need be. So strike that idea. Well okay. So maybe she’d taken too long getting ready and Joyce had had to take her to school. Buffy would have protested but her mother was on some new reform kick that involved ensuring that Buffy at least got to school on time. That was a possibility. It had happened before. So why hadn’t she at least called. She always did when she couldn’t make it because of some unforeseen circumstance. So why hadn’t she? “Maybe she’s hurt,” Angel murmured aloud. His nails dug into the meat of his palm as his pace quickened, tracing the same path that Buffy had frantically worked the night before in her own frustration. He stopped and shook his head. “No.” She was fine. She had to be. If something had happened to her, he would have known. In theory. Reaching across the bed, he grabbed at the cordless that was nestled into the crack where the wall met the mattress. He had put it there the night before so that he wouldn’t have to scurry for the phone should she decide to call him to vent more frustration or even just to talk. He dialed the library quickly and waited impatiently as the phone rang. Once. Twice. Three times. “Hello?” Willow Rosenberg finally answered. She sounded distracted. “Willow, hi. Where’s Buffy?” Angel blurted out quickly. His fingers tangled in the sheets as he fought to make himself comfortable. It was a losing battle. Finally he stood again and resumed his anxious pacing. There was a pause and then Willow replied,”Buffy’s…not here.” “Where is she then? Class?” “Angel..something’s happened,” Willow said cautiously. The moment she said the words, he felt his heart crash to his knees and his stomach heaved violently. “Is she alright?” he whispered. “Physically she’s fine. Emotionally..she’s a wreck.” There was a pause and then she said softly, “Ted is dead.” “Wha? What happened?” Angel gasped out, slowly catching on. “The police report as of right now says that he fell down the stairs and broke his neck. And that Buffy is responsible for it. They haven’t charged her with anything..yet. She’s taking it pretty hard though.” “I imagine,” Angel murmured thoughtfully. “But you’ve seen her this morning, right? You know she’s not hurt, right?” “Xander and I saw her briefly but then she took off. We haven’t seen or heard from her since. We were kinda hoping that she’d gone to see you.” “I wish,” Angel replied, sighing deeply. “Alright, maybe she’ll still show up.” “If she does, call here. We’re all worried. She..she wasn’t herself this morning. I‘ve never seen her this upset and down on herself. And you know how she can get..” “I do,” Angel agreed, thinking about how stubborn his little blonde girlfriend was. She had a hell of a time asking for help and it tended to get her into trouble that would be almost certainly fatal for the average mortal. Then again, Buffy Summers was anything but average. “If we hear from her, I’ll call you,” Willow promised. Then she added, “Don’t worry, we’ll get her through this.” “Thanks, Will.” Angel replied softly. He sighed once more and then removed the phone from his ear and punched the “off” button. Frowning thoughtfully, he crossed over to the closet. He opened it and stared down at the still boxed eighteen inch color Sony. It’d been an impulsive purchase he’d made right after he’d moved into the apartment. And then of course he’d remembered that he had no use for television. Dragging it out, he tore through the packaging until he got the TV, leaving a chaotic circle of debris around him. He pulled it free of the box and then stared at it thoughtfully. The plugging in part made sense at least. Electricity. Power. He reached across and pulled the clock free from the wall and quickly plugged in the cord for the TV. After frowning at it for a moment, he finally jabbed at the gray and white button under the screen labeled “power”. The screen flashed brightly and came to life, assaulting his eyes. Involuntarily, he growled. He’d been with Buffy when she channel-surfed as she called it. What it looked like to him was organized but randomized insanity. Stations flashing by quicker than the human mind could possibly register and causing the viewer to take on a glazed if not slightly euphoric gleam to their eyes. It was nauseating. So the question then became, how did she do it? The remote. He saw it lying in a plastic bag with an oversized white book and two small batteries. He tore through the plastic and pulled out the remote and the batteries. After a few moments of cautious study, he finally but them into the back of the channel-changer. Then he hit the button with the arrow pointing up. The channels flew by in a hypnotic show of light and shapes. “Woah,” he murmured as the bright colors assaulted him. And then he stopped. “…Sunnydale High student is under suspicion but has yet to be charged. At this time, it has not been determined if Ted Buchanon’s death was accidental or intentional. Detective Rick Stein of the Sunnydale Police Department has promised a full investigation and is quick to assure that the truth will be forthcoming.” There was a pause and then the newsman looked dead-on at the camera. “I’m Ken Hill for Channel Seven news.” Angel slid back against his bed. “Oh God, Buffy.” No wonder she’d left school. The media, everyone was looking at her as if she was a cold-blooded killer. And if he knew Buffy the way he thought he did, she was probably agreeing with them. He slammed his fist into his palm and growled. “Dammit.” He should have known better than to let her go back to where she was as upset as she’d been. As it were, she’d been hanging on to her temper by the slimmest of all possible threads. Angel stopped his line of thought abruptly. Buffy wasn’t a killer. A warrior for the good guys but not a murderer. That meant that Ted had done something to her. He narrowed his dark eyes dangerously. Maybe it was a good thing that Buffy had killed Ted then because if the bastard had still been living after he’d in any way hurt Buffy… Angel chuckled humorously as he realized that he would have killed the man without a second thought for even touching Buffy. Only Buffy had gotten there first. And was falling apart because of it. Closing his eyes tightly, Angel silently begged for his beautiful blonde girlfriend to walk through his door. To step into his apartment and into his waiting arms. This part takes place after the real death of Ted. “That old dark cloud Acts like he owns you He takes up too much time Time you could be spending holding me But he can’t have you now.” He pushed the doors to the hospital lobby open and rushed in, looking every bit the part of the concerned and anxious boyfriend that he was. Looking around wildly, his eyes finally settled on the three Slayerettes huddled next to the soda machine. Willow was speaking softly, calmly, as if she was explaining something important. His heart aching more than he’d ever thought possible, Angel made his way over to them. “Where is she? Is she alright?” Willow turned quickly and favored him with a small half-smile. It’d been she that had called him less than twenty minutes earlier from the admissions desk of the Emergency Room. Reaching out, she grabbed his uninjured hand and gave it a squeeze. “She’s fine. A little bruised but fine.” “Who did this to her?” Angel demanded. Willow glanced over at Cordelia, “Would you?” “Ya,” Cordy nodded, stepping a foot closer to Angel. Xander rolled his eyes and then followed after Willow as she made her way over to the admissions desk. “It’s a long story,” the tall cheerleader began as she led him to a row of chairs. He barely paid any attention to her lengthy explanation that was filled with her snappy commentary. Instead he watched the desk where Willow and Xander were calmly talking to the head nurse. Finally he rose from the chair and crossed over to join them, leaving Cordelia alone and slack-jawed. After a beat, she followed. “I know I was talking,” Cordelia admonished, slapping him lightly on the forearm. He tossed her a wary if not slightly apologetic half-smile and then turned back to the desk. “What’s going on? Is there a problem?” The nurse lifted an eyebrow, “And you are?” Angel growled low in throat, frustrated by the woman’s question. Didn’t she understand that only Buffy mattered? Luckily, Willow stepped in. “He’s Buffy’s boyfriend. He’s just worried. We all are. You said she’s okay..so why can’t we see and why hasn’t she been released?” “Well, because she needs an adult to sign her release forms and her mother is still sleeping. We expect her to remain as such until morning.” “And her father?” Xander queried. “We haven’t been able to get ahold of him. And the other person Ms. Summers mentioned is also unreachable.” “Giles?” Willow questioned. The nurse nodded. “You just need a legal adult to sign the papers, right” Angel asked, tapping his fingers anxiously against the desk. The nurse shot him an irritated glare so he stopped. “That’s right. You’re over eighteen?” The nurse asked, a hint of amusement in her gray eyes. “I am,” Angel replied dryly. “You’re a little old to be dating a sixteen year old girl, aren’t you?” she queried, reaching across the desk for a clipboard with release forms attached to it. He shot her a wary look and took the board from her. Teeth clenched in frustration, he went to work on filling out the necessary paperwork. “So we’ll tell her mom that Giles signed her release forms,” Willow instructed the group as they walked down the hospital hallway. “Which he would have if anyone knew where the hell he was,” Xander commented, pointing dramatically at a door. The group entered slowly, cautiously. She was sitting by a large white bed that was holding her mothers’ sleeping form. Angel cast a quick cursory glance over the older Summers woman and then nodded slowly. She’d be fine. “Buffy,” Willow chirped, reaching over to squeeze her best friends’ free left hand. The right one was holding a blue ice pack to her jaw which looked to be several different shades of purple and blue. The swelling had really kicked in. “Are you okay?” She took away the ice pack and nodded slowly. “I’m fine, Will. We both are, thanks to you guys.” She stepped over to Xander and gave him a peck on the cheek. “Thank you for calling the ambulance for my mom. I guess I was a little out of it.” Xander lifted and eyebrow and then shrugged. “Sure, anything for my Buffster. How are you feeling?” “Like I hate this place,” Buffy muttered beneath her breath. And then she turned towards the dark shadows that consumed the corners of the rooms. “Would you stop lurking, please?” “Sorry. Habit,” Angel apologized, stepping forward to take the tiny Slayer into his arms. He kissed her hair and then lifted her hand back to push the icepack against her jaw again. “God, I’m glad that’s over,” she murmured, relaxing into his hold. And then her eyes flew open and she separated herself from him. “Wait a minute! What the hell are you doing out of bed? You’re hurt..” He smirked. “So are you. Why don’t you let me take you home so you can get some rest. You look beat.” “But mom..” “Will be fine,” Willow soothed. “Go home and sleep.” Her tone was firm. “But..” “I’d listen to her when she gets like that,” Cordelia suggested as she gazed at her nails with a frown. “Damn, I chipped one. Gross.” Sighing deeply, Buffy finally relented. “Fine. Did Giles sign my papers?” “I did,” Angel said quickly. “So no more questions. You’re going to bed. Now.” She was practically sleepwalking by the time he led her into her bedroom. Giving her a quick kiss, he urged her towards the bathroom so that she could get ready for bed. While she was gone, he pulled the drapes tightly around the window so that the light wouldn’t be a problem come morning. She re-entered the bedroom wearing blue and white boxers that looked awfully familiar and an oversized white men’s tee-shirt. He lifted an eyebrow. “Mine?” She just smirked and made her way over to where he was sitting on the bed. Reaching out, she wrapped an arm around him and then placed her head lightly on his shoulder. “Are you okay?” he asked. “I mean..really okay?” “I’m fine. A little shaken up maybe but I’m me. Everyone is finally okay. And Ted is gone.” She sombered up a bit as she thought about it. He opened his mouth to question her but was stopped by the feel of her body leaning against his as she tried to embrace sleep. She gently pushed her balled fist into the meat of his shoulder as if she was trying to make him a more comfortable pillow and then she settled against him. Drowsily she murmured, “G’night Angel.” He kissed her lightly, “Sleep well.” Weaving a hand into her hair, he pulled her even closer so that he could feel the pressure of her heart beating. He watched thoughtfully as her breathing slowed into a gentle pattern and she finally slipped into the first restful sleep she’d had in days. Pulling the blanket up and around them, he shifted his body so that he was holding her completely, hands meeting in front of her. He pressed his cheek against hers and then set to watching her sleep. -FIN _______________________________________________________ Get your free, private e-mail at http://mail.excite.com/ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: tthwaite@banff.net (tj thwaites) Subject: BUFFYFIC: Aftermath (1/1) by tj thwaites Date: 09 Nov 1998 00:26:35 -0700 Title: Aftermath Author: tj thwaites E-mail: tthwaite@banff.net Archive: mailing list archives for now, I may revise this after the new ep airs. Rating: PG Spoilers: Band Candy (sort of, this is idle speculation based on the previews) Summary: Just a silly thought I had about what might happen between teen-influenced Joyce and the returned Ripper. Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, Joss does. I'm just taking a quick dip in his pool. Aftermath by tj thwaites (aka the dyslexic ferret) "I just want to check and make sure my Mom is back to normal," Buffy told Faith as the two Slayers turned the corner onto Revello Drive, "Then we can see if we can find out where Giles disappeared to." "Sure thing, Bee," Faith replied, ignoring the annoyed look from Buffy, "But I gotta tell you, Willow really surprised me with that counterspell. I didn't know she was that powerful a witch." "She surprised me, too," Buffy said, "I knew she'd been studying witchcraft, but I hadn't known she'd gotten that good, either. I'm glad she's on our side." When the Slayers arrived at the Summers residence, Faith immediately headed for the kitchen. She had a major case of the munchies after today's events. Buffy headed upstairs to look for her mother after the main floor proved deserted. Buffy silently pushed open the door to her mother's room to peek inside. The first thing she saw was the clothes scattered over the floor. She ignored them; the spell had just been broken and her mother obviously hadn't had much time to come back to herself, let alone clean up the teenager-style mess. Buffy stepped fully into the room when she saw the lump under the covers, relieved that her mother was home and not still out somewhere wandering around. Buffy quietly approached the bed, intent merely on making sure her mother was sleeping peacefully. Her hand flew to her mouth to suppress the outcry that threatened when saw that her mother was not alone. The light from the moon and the streetlights clearly illuminating the faces of the bed's two occupants. Buffy stared at the faces in shock. She turned and darted from the room, a part of her mind amazed that she still had the ability to remember to not slam the door (and possibly awaken the bed's occupants). But the larger part kept replaying those few seconds when she'd seen the peaceful serenity on the sleeping faces of her mother and her Watcher. And the tiny smile on her mother's lips. [Whoa!] Buffy thought, leaning against the hallway wall for support, [Tomorrow morning is going to be *so* bizarre.] Buffy's head snapped up and she stared at her mother's bedroom door, surprised by her own reaction. She wasn't upset about the situation she'd stumbled across, quite the opposite in fact. She hoped that when morning did roll around, what had obviously taken place between Giles and her mother didn't cause too many problems. When Buffy returned downstairs to the kitchen, she found Faith busy attacking a huge bowl of ice cream. She grabbed a bowl of her own from the cupboard and began serving herself some cookies and cream goodness. "Hey," Faith said, amused, "I guess the need to find and watch over the Watcher is no match for frozen treats, huh?" "No need to go looking anywhere," Buffy replied, "I know exactly where Giles is." The spoon halted halfway to Faith's mouth. Her eyebrows rose in question. "So," Faith finally asked after Buffy finished filling her bowl, "Where is he?" "Upstairs," Buffy replied with an impish grin, "He and my Mom are doing an amazing imitation of a pair of spoons in a drawer." Faith's spoonful of ice cream clattered to the table. "Are you serious?" Faith blurted, then continued when Buffy nodded, "And you're not wigged?" "Actually," Buffy answered, "I'm kinda hoping that there's more to it than the mondo-impulsiveness of that damned spell. Maybe something good can come from it." Faith watched in fascination as Buffy turned her attention to the bowl of ice cream in front of her and dug in. Faith picked up her own spoon again, shaking her head. One thing for sure, Sunnydale was never boring. Living here was like living in the middle of a soap opera of the weirdest kind. ===== Three weeks later Buffy led Giles into the living room. This had to stop. Now. The past three weeks had been way too stessful with both her mother and Watcher walking on eggshells where Buffy was concerned and totally avoiding each other. Buffy couldn't help but flash back to the source of the problem. Once again, she was going to have to be the adult and force the adults to face the childishness of their behaviour. Buffy shook her head with a snort when Giles froze in his tracks. She grabbed his arm and virtually dragged him over to the couch where her mother sat twisting a tea towel nervously. "Giles," Buffy commanded, "Sit down." Buffy put her hands on her hips in exasperation when Giles sat at the opposite end of the couch, refusing to even look at Joyce. Enough was enough. These two were going to settle this, one way or the other. "All right," Buffy began, "The two of you have been dancing around the issue for three weeks now and it's time to stop. I'm going to go out on patrol, but you are going to talk. You have to face each other and what happened between you that night. Decide whether it was a mistake or not, and what you're going to do now. When I get home, I expect you two to have reached a conclusion you both can accept." "Decide whether or *not* it was a mistake?" Joyce asked, surprised by Buffy's wording. "Well," Buffy said, feeling her face starting to heat, "When I looked in on you that night and found you together, the looks on your faces (even asleep) seemed...well...happy." Giles and Joyce finally looked at each other at this revelation. They both coloured slightly and looked away. "I checked out the spell," Buffy continued, "And I think Xander had the best paraphrase: 'They all seemed totally wasted, but without the slurred speech or falling down parts'. That spell turned off your impulse control and eliminated your inhibitions, like being drunk. So maybe what happened that night wasn't a mistake if you don't want it to be. I'm not suggesting running off to Vegas or anything, but you guys *need* to talk about it and decide if it was a momentary whim or because of something deeper. I'm leaving now. Me Slay, you talk." Buffy turned and rushed out of the house, her face burning. She couldn't believe she'd just said all that. She headed toward the park. A little undead activity was what she needed to get her mind off everything for a few hours. ===== The lights were still on when Buffy returned home two hours later, dusty and sweaty, but much calmer. She paused at the front door a moment, wondering if Giles and her mother had worked things out or if they'd bailed on the whole process as soon as she was out of the house. She took a deep breath and went inside, her mouth opening to call out that she was home. All the breath rushed out of her body and her bottom jaw just hung open. Giles and her mother were curled up on the couch, asleep. On the TV, Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks were getting in the elevator at the top of the Empire State building. [Sleepless In Seattle?] Buffy thought, amazed, [Mom actually got him to watch a 'chick flick' with her? I guess I was right, they do 'have feelings' for each other.] Buffy stood silently for several seconds pondering that possibility. Something she once said to Jenny Calender popped into her head: "I don't want him to be lonely. I don't want anyone to." At the time, Buffy hadn't really thought about it, but that applied to her mother as well. And as wigsome as the thought of her mother and Giles getting together was at first glance, Buffy surprised herself by admitting that they did look good together. And there was no big secret to keep since the Slayer gig was already out in the open with them. Buffy sighed and a smile crept onto her face. They looked cute cuddled together like that. Buffy silently crossed over to the couch and picked the Afghan off the back. She unfolded it and gently drew it across her mother's supine form. She removed Giles' glasses, careful not to wake him, and set them on the end table. She turned off the TV and the VCR and headed for the stairs. But she paused at the bottom step to gaze fondly at her Watcher. [If this gets serious, Giles,] she told him silently, [I hope you don't expect me to call you 'Dad'.] Buffy climbed the stairs to her room grinning. Teasing Giles was about to get very interesting. THE END Noel:"Disappointment doesn't kill." Abby:"Right. Rejection kills. Disappointment only maims." -- "The Truth About Cats and Dogs" An optimist sees the glass half full A pessimist sees the glass half empty And a realist understands that soon he's going to have to wash the glass In a world of shit you hold your nose and swim. Don't worry about the bullet with your name on it, worry about the one addressed "to whom it may concern". @-}-}-- tj thwaites @-}-}-- @-}-}-- tthwaite@banff.net @-}-}-- @-}-}-- Box 2890, Banff, AB, T0L 0C0 @-}-}-- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Aglx@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Soul of Good & Evil (5/?) Date: 10 Nov 1998 13:07:02 EST Title: The Soul of Good & Evil (5/?) Author: Michelle E-mail: Aglx@aol.com Rating: PG-13 (for this part...there's really nothing but a bit of blood) Author's Notes: This story follows directly after my two others, "Vengeance," and "Lost & Found." I rewrote the third part with a completely different plot (the story that this is an alternate for is, "Deadly Instincts." Basically, everyone is a vampire, with a soul except Drusilla and Spike. Buffy, Willow, Xander, Angel, Giles, Joyce, everybody. http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html Spoilers: Plot has nothing to do with real series except for characters that are used. Feedback: I know there are people on this list. Too bad no one bothers to send feedback. If you would, I'd appreciate it. I send it to you! * * * * "Are you going to tell me what happened?" "Nope," Buffy said bluntly. The slightest trace of a smile was hung on her lips, but she did her best to cover it. "So, what did you do to get yourself shot?!" Buffy was lying down on the coffee table of her living room while Xander attempted to clear her wounds. "Why do you automatically assume I was to blame?" "Because you've got two bullets in you. Now hold still or this is *really* going to hurt." Buffy rested an arm across her face and tried to remain calm. But the bullet that just reopened her stomach wound was terribly painful. "Okay, hold on." Just as Xander was about to take out the bullet from Buffy's leg, the doorbell rang. "You, stay here. I'll get that." "Just be careful who you invite in, okay?" Xander ignored her and went to the door. To his surprise, he found his beautiful red-headed love standing on the front porch. "Willow! Come in. You said you weren't going to be here until tomorrow night." "I caught an early flight." She stepped through the doors and the sight of Buffy lying on the coffee table with blood all over her wasn't exactly the welcome she was expecting. "Buffy! What happened?" "Willow, hi. Oh, this? It's nothing. Maniac with a gun plus attempted robery and murder equals Buffy getting shot." Buffy attempted a smile but it didn't come out a such. "Uh, Xander. Are you going to finish, or do you plan on leaving me like this?" "Sorry." Xander walked over and picked up a pair of tweezers. "Here we go." The look in his eye was more frightening to Buffy than the thought of living with these hunks of metal in her. Willow instinctively grabbed Buffy's hand at an attempt to comfort her friend. "Hey! What are you doing, digging them out with your bare hands?" Buffy lifted her head to catch Xander's eye but he avoided it. "No, I would never do that. Just sit tight, I have one more left." After Xander removed the bullets, Buffy's skin quickly rebuilt itself. "Much better," Buffy said standing on her own two feet. "Now, Willow, I assume Xander's filled you in on my current situation?" "Yeah," she said a meak Willow voice. "Well, I'm not exactly sure what's going on. Spike really is our only hope in this one." The doorbell rang again, interupting Buffy yet again. "I'll get it." "Spike," Buffy said, shocked to see him standing on her doorstep. "Hello luv." "Didn't I tell you not to call me that? Too many freaky memories of Drusilla..." Buffy made a sickly face and then pointed Spike in the direction of the living room. "Right, I'll remember that." "Sure you will," Buffy said sarcastically before following him into the living room where Willow and Xander were seated. "Guys, you know Spike." "Oh, yeah. We've met," Xander said, eyeing Spike but offering no means of a truce between the two. Spike indicated Xander's presence with the tilt of his head. He was still holding a grudge for that whole dungeon experience at the villa. "You two want to call of the wars. We're on the same side this time and if you can't work together, I'll do this on my own." "I just want Dru back. If it means getting along with him, alright." "Xander?" Buffy asked, sternly glaring at him. "Yeah, yeah. I'll get along with blondy here if I have to. But once this is all over, it's back to immortal enemies. Deal?" "Damn right," Spike said turning away from the group and finding a chair. At the sight of the blood all over the floor and coffee table, he looked to Buffy for an answer. "Got shot. All better now." He seemed satisfied with that and she moved to the couch. "Now, from what I've figured out, Drusilla's power keeps growing. I don't quite know how, but it does. Whatever she used to restore herself to full power is still at work and we've got to stop her before she does kill Angel." "Without killing her," Spike promptly added. "Yeah, without killing anyone." Buffy knew that Spike would only help as long as she promised not to kill Dru. So she did, but that didn't change the fact that she was planning it, no matter what. "Spike, do you have any idea what she used to get her power back?" "Uh, yeah. But, I don't think it will be of any help." "Why?" "Her powers were restored by the Devil himself." Everyone fell silent for a brief moment. Buffy was the only one to look at Spike for confirmation. "How?" "She promised your rising to the dark side to him. If she was granted full strength, she would capture you, and re-awaken you to a new life in return. That's what Angel and her were plotting when I came to you." "They why is her strength still growing?" "That I can't tell you, pet. I only know what happened before you sent me to Vienna and after I restored all your souls. "Well then, lets go find Drusilla and hopefully she'll lead us to Angel." Buffy stood and reached for her jacket on the back of Spike's chair. "Hopefully," Willow repeated with less confidence. "Soon as the sun goes down tonight, we move. Willow, Xander, you two can stay in the spare bedroom. Spike..." "I'll take the couch." * * * * * -Michelle ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Aglx@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: The Soul of Good & Evil (6/?) Date: 10 Nov 1998 13:25:03 EST Title: The Soul of Good & Evil (6/?) Author: Michelle E-mail: Aglx@aol.com Rating: PG-13 (this part: blood drinking, little kissing, but nothing more) Author's Notes: This story follows directly after my two others, "Vengeance," and "Lost & Found." I rewrote the third part with a completely different plot (the story that this is an alternate for is, "Deadly Instincts." Basically, everyone is a vampire, with a soul except Drusilla and Spike. Buffy, Willow, Xander, Angel, Giles, Joyce, everybody. http://members.aol.com/aglx/fanfic.html Spoilers: Plot has nothing to do with real series except for characters that are used. Feedback: I know there are people on this list. Too bad no one bothers to send feedback. If you would, I'd appreciate it. I send it to you! They had taken the first flight out of Sunnydale after sundown and traveled across the country to New York where they waited out the sun then snuck into the cargo area of a flight straight to Vienna. They arrived at night, which was better luck than any of them could have asked for. Buffy awoke curled up on the soft white bed in the middle of Spike's Vienna hideaway. The room was just as bare as she remembered it from the last time they were there. Spike was standing in the same place, against a wall staring at her. Only now, Willow and Xander were lying on the floor across the room. "Why is it every time you and I conspire some plan to get our lovers back, I end up in this bed with you staring at me?" Buffy asked, looking at him accusingly. "Luck?" "Who for?" Buffy laughed a bit and swung her feet of the bed to meet the cold floor. Even to her skin, she felt a shiver creep up her spine as she walked over to him. She still wore the black leather pants and skin tight white shirt she'd changed into before they left Sunnydale. Spike only smiled back at her, then quickly glanced and the two others curled up in eachother's embrace beneath one of the covered windows. "Hungry?" He asked quietly. "Three days of traveling without a bite, what do you think?" "Forgot about that soul thing. You must be hungry." "Any good places here where I can get a dead meal? Last time I was here, it really wasn't much of a concern." "Yeah, there's a butcher's shop down the road." "Yum," she said and gracefully danced back over to the bed where her coat sat at the foot of the bed. "You know, you have the strangest taste in decorating." She slipped her feet into her boots then walked--although it sounded more like stomping with the boots--back to Spike. "Well, I don't really live here. I just use it for..." he trailed off not quite sure if he should go into detail and hoping Buffy would get the idea." "I get it." Buffy thought for a second then her face crumbled into a disgusted glare. "Ewww," she said aloud realizing she had been sleeping in that bed. * * * * * "Angel. Where are you pet?" Drusilla flew into the master bedroom of her new mansion, a sexy red gown draped over her body. "Here, love." Angel replied sliding off the bed and meeting her in the middle of the room. "Mummy's going to get something to eat. You want?" Dru smiled innocently and she certainly had a talent for making it look real. "You know I can't Dru." Angel reached for her and wrapped his arms tightly around her tiny waste. His fingers caressed her soft skin at the absence of a back to her dress. "Yes, I know. That pesky soul of your won't let you. I'll bring you some fresh blood." "Thanks, my sweet," he said and placed several gentle kisses on her forehead and down her nose until he reached her lips. She wove her fingers through his hair and kissed his lips deeply. Quickly shoving him away, she forced his arms to let go of her waist. "I won't be long." She called and skipped out of the room. After Drusilla finally left the room, Angel rubbed her taste off his lips and spit, disgustedly to the floor. "I have *got* to get the hell out of here!" His act was working to convince Drusilla, but he didn't know how much longer he could last. If Buffy didn't figure out what was going on soon, he was going to get caught. The last thing he wanted to know is what a newly powerful Drusilla would do to him if she ever found out that he had lied to her and *pretended* to care for her. Her damned spell kept him her prisoner. He couldn't leave her and yet she made not attempt to take away his soul. She wanted him to be hers, and she wanted him to suffer. * * * * -Michelle ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Dalton Spence Subject: BUFFYFIC: CHALLENGE: Consequences for Christmas Date: 11 Nov 1998 00:11:02 -0500 (EST) This reply has also been sent to the newsgroups. After the events of this week's episode, I think my title pretty much explains my fanfic challenge idea, but just in case: It's the week before Christmas, and Joyce Summers is late. Is it just stress (lord knows she has enough) or the result of too much "chocolate"? Given this is the Hellmouth, the rabbit probably WILL die ... but will it come back? (Can you say Bunnicula?) Is Buffy ready for the toughest assignment of all ... BABYSITTING? Go to it! -- @==================================================@ | Dalton S. Spence, B.Sc. | | Home Page: http://www.hwcn.org/~ag775/home.html | | Keeper of Cordelia's Roll of Linoleum | | and Xander's Key to the Utility Closet | | Family Motto: Virtute Acquiritur Honos | @==================================================@ - Urgent! You must meet a long-lost uncle at Wall Street and get the cummerbund. FNORD! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Black Fire Subject: Re: BUFFYFIC: Legacy of the Burgunds (2/?) Date: 11 Nov 1998 09:12:12 -0800 (PST) Title: Legacy of the Burgunds Author: Black Fire Email: blackfire42@yahoo.com Feedback: Please? Spoilers: This part comes after Homecoming. I need to see what happens with the next few episodes. For now, this is like a subplot to the current storyline. Disclaimers: I don't own any of the Buffy characters and I can't afford to. (Though, I wish I could, a least afford to.) Wolf and any other characters (I haven't even given them all names yet, how lame) are mine. Please do not use them without asking. Summary: This story is heavilly based in Germanic/Norse mythology, particularly, on the Saga of the Volsungs. Two of the greatest legends of the past have returned, bringing who-knows-what with them. Legacy of the Burgunds Chapter 2 -- A New Friend "So, are you still upset that Scott broke up with you?" Willow asked a few weeks later. "What?" Buffy asked. "Me upset about a *normal* guy breaking up with me? What gave you that impression?" "Oh, I don't know," Willow said, stirring her drink, "maybe the fact that Faith's been complaining of sore muscles after training lately?" "Oh..." Buffy grinned sheepishly. "You'll find someone else," Willow smiled. "Yeah, maybe," Buffy pouted, as her thoughts, once again, turned to the idea of Angel cooped up in that house. He was a wreck, and she wasn't being of much help. "Hello, ladies," an unfamiliar voice interrupted her thoughts. "Oh, hi!" Willow said, "when did you get back in town?" "A few days ago," the voice said. "Buffy," Willow said, getting her attention, "this is Wolf." "Hello," Buffy said as she finally looked up. All thoughts of old boyfriends were instantly erased. The guy standing at their table was gorgeous. He was tall, well built, with short, blond hair. He looked like he could have, easily taken on the entire Sunnydale High football team. But it was the eyes that caught Buffy's attention; a pair of beautiful, golden eyes that seemed to gleam like precious metal. "Buffy Summers," she said, extending her hand. "Wolfgang Wagner," he said, taking her hand, "but, please call me Wolf, all my friends do." "Wolf moved here over the summer," Willow explained. "He was supposed to transfer to Sunnydale High, but you sort of disappeared on us right before school started." "Yes, my Grandmother fell very ill," Wolf continued. "My father and I had to return to Germany to help out the family." "Oh!" Willow frowned, "Is she all right now?" "No," Wolf sighed, "she died. That's why we were gone so long. We were getting her affairs in order." "I'm sorry," Willow said, putting a comforting hand on the guy's shoulder. "It's all right," he said. There was an uncomfortable silence. Wolf then returned his attention to Buffy. "So, you're the infamous Buffy that I've heard so much about this summer!" "Yep," Buffy smiled, "that's me. Known by one and all as a juvenile delinquent." "Oh, I don't know," Wolf laughed, "your friends don't seem to think so." "Well, what can I say?" Buffy shrugged. "I have a few people on my side." "Well," he said, taking her hand, "I hope that I will be one of those. You're friends tell me good things about you. And, from the looks of it, you can't be as bad as other have said." "Thanks," Buffy replied, "I think." "Well, I'll see you two in school tomorrow," Wolf quipped. "Chow!" "Bye!" the girls answered. "So...," Buffy said, after he left. "So... what?" Willow asked. "So why didn't you tell me that there was a hottie like that in town?" Buffy demanded. "Well, I didn't think about it," Willow defended herself. "And, besides, you weren't in much of a talkative mood when you got back." "Oh, okay," Buffy stood down. "You're off the hook." "He had a bit of trouble when he first moved here, though," Willow said. "Really?" Buffy asked. "Yeah," Willow explained. "Apparently, there's some kind of special animal permit he had to get." "Animal permit?" Buffy asked, confused. "Oh! You should see her!" Willow exclaimed. "She's the most beautiful wolf I've ever seen! And she's so friendly! She wouldn't hurt a flea! But the city has problems with someone keeping a wolf, so Wolf had to get a permit for her." "Well, let's just hope that they never find out about Oz then," Buffy laughed as they were getting up to leave. "Hey!!" Willow cried, following her out. == The Black Fire | Vote for me in the Site Fights!! Blackfire42@yahoo.com | http://www.thesitefights.com/sarina/nest2.htm http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shadowlands/4203 "But if they all forget me I will be here anyway, like an artifact of some lost civilization" -Vlad Dracula _The Dracula Tape_ "Don't worry. I'm not here to eat." -- Angel (IG) _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: uzenet@videotron.ca Subject: BUFFYFIC: REPOST: Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators (1/?) Date: 11 Nov 1998 01:13:32 -0500 Title: Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators Author: Northlight email: uzenet@videotron.ca Summary: Dru is up to something, and Buffy and her friends get a strange ally. Note: This story is based on the events in Generation X #36 to #39 (?). It was an absolutely *terrible* story arc in the comic, but I just had to see how Buffy and her friends would react to the Pooka < g >. I just hope that it doesn't get *too* silly! Disclaimer: Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon. The Pooka and all related silliness belong to Marvel. Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators by Northlight Buffy swirled around gracefully, the stake held in her hand with casual familiarity finding it's mark in the heart of her opponent. The vampire gaped at her for a moment, stunned that it's unlife was over mere moments after it had begun. And then, it's body shattered apart, nothing but dust left to mark the undead creature's passing. The vampire and the dust were expected, but the figure revealed by the vampire's sudden departure was most assuredly not. Buffy's eyes widened, and she shook her head in disbelief, trying to clear the strange vision before her from her mind. It didn't work. There was still a giant, seven foot tall weasel lounging against a headstone. A *weasel*, Buffy thought incredulously. Granted, she had seen a lot of strange things during her career as Slayer, but really, this was just too ridiculous! 'What exactly do I do to the weasel?' Buffy wondered as she faced the weasel awkwardly. 'Giles *never* covered anything like this!' Buffy decided that it would be best to stick with tried and true methods. She brandished her stake and glared at the weasel threateningly. "What the hell are you?" Buffy demanded. The weasel smiled suavely, and took a sip from it's martini. 'Oh God!' Buffy thought, her shock level rising another notch. 'A giant, naked, talking weasel with a martini! It must be the stress getting to me...' "Elwood," the weasel said calmly. "Elwood the Pooka." Buffy gaped at him. "Elwood the what?!" Seeing the weasel -- Pooka -- about to explain what exactly a 'Pooka' was, Buffy shook her head, cutting the explanation off before it could begin. "Never mind, I don't want to know!" Elwood merely shrugged and took another sip of his martini. "I'm here to help you, Buffy -- there's something really big going on, and seeing as you're the Slayer and all, I thought that you'd want to be in on it!" Buffy bit back her instinctive urge to demand how he knew that she was the Slayer and nodded. "I think I'd better talk to Giles about this," she muttered, casting a quick glance towards the amused Pooka. The large weasel nodded back to her. "That's fine with me! I haven't had a chance to chat with a Watcher in ages! It should be a real blast." That said, Elwood reached into his pocket of his coat -- the only clothing he wore -- and riffled around. He then proceeded to pull out what looked like nothing so much as a bumper car. "Hop in," he told Buffy, already having settled himself into the rather cramped seat. "What is that thing?" Buffy asked in shock. 'Could this night possibly get any stranger? Pookas and bumper cars pulled from pockets... ugh, I'm getting a headache just thinking about all this!' "It's our mode of transportation to the library. It'll bounce us there within moments," Elwood responded. "I don't think so," Buffy said, casting a dubious glance at the small car. "I'd rather walk, thank you very much!" Elwood shrugged. "If you insist, but my way is much more exciting!" He stepped out of the car and stuffed it back into his coat pocket. "So let's get moving. Time is a wastin'!" They made their way to the library without incident. Buffy rather thought that any vampire that was out that night would have been scared away by the sight of the large weasel at her side. As it was, Buffy felt rather uncomfortable herself. She kept darting nervous peeks at Elwood. 'A weasel!' As usual, Giles was in the library, engrossed in a large leather bound book. Willow and Xander were also there, waiting for Buffy to finish her nightly patrol before they left for the Bronze together. They looked up at her arrival, and Buffy hesitated a moment. What was she supposed to tell them? 'Hey guys, guess what followed me home? A giant weasel!' Buffy gave a small, mental shrug, They'd figure out what he was on their own. "Say hi to Elwood," Buffy told them, gesturing towards her strange companion. Their eyes followed her hand, and then Xander's eyes shifted back towards Buffy. "You've named the door Elwood? I've always rather thought of it as a 'Jasper' myself." "I'm not talking about the door, Xander!" Buffy exclaimed, slightly irritable. How could he have missed the huge weasel? "I'm talking about the weasel!" "Um... Buffy?" Willow said hesitantly, as if worried about upseting her dear and slightly unstable friend any further. "There's nothing there -- especially not any weasels." Elwood snickered softly and Buffy turned to glare at him. "They can't see you! And what exactly do you find so funny about all of this!?" "I love doing that!" he exclaimed. Seeing the deadly look in Buffy's eyes, the weasel quickly calmed down. "Sorry," he said sheepishly. Xander's eyes widened. Obviously, Elwood had fixed things. "Oh man -- it's a giant weasel!" He paused a moment. "Was it just me, or did that sound like something I never thought that I'd be saying?" "Oh my," Giles breathed, staring at Elwood. There was something decidedly uneasy in the Watcher's eyes as he looked at the strange creature in his library. "A Pooka!" Buffy gave a slight sigh of relief. She wasn't going crazy. The others had seen the blasted weasel, and Giles had obviously heard about these 'Pooka' creatures. "That's what he said," Buffy agreed with her Watcher's placement of the weasel in weird creatures family. Willow finally found her voice. She drew her eyes away from the naked weasel and settled on the much more familiar and reassuring Giles. "A what?" Willow asked, unknowingly asking a variation of the same question Buffy had asked upon being informed of Elwood's Pookaness. Noting Giles expression, Buffy realized that the Watcher looked almost sick as he tore his attention from Elwood and towards his young charges. "A Pooka -- A giant weasel that also happens to be a mythical creature that appears only to people that he wishes to see him." Giles explained. "So what's our furry friend doing here?" Xander asked, watching the Pooka with awe. He had never expected that a seven foot tall, martini drinking Pooka would make an appearance in his life, and he was taking full advantage to get in as much amazed gawking as he could. "I'm here to warn you about a grave danger that you'll be facing," Elwood said, basking in the glow of Xander's attention. "I thought that cryptic warnings were Angel's job," Xander said, "but can we keep the Pooka instead?" His comment drew a glare from Buffy. "What, precisely, do you wish to warn us about?" Giles asked, focusing on the matter at hand. And the quicker Elwood delivered his message, the quicker they would be rid of the bloody weasel. The Pooka didn't have the chance to reply to Giles' question, for Angel chose that moment to make his entrance into the library. "Buffy, there's something about to happen tonight--" He came to a sudden halt as the Pooka's presence became evident. "A Pooka!" Angel growled. "A Vampire!" Elwood gasped. Buffy moved towards Angel, placing herself between vampire and Pooka -- just in case there was some sort of blood sucking demon/ talking weasel feud going on. "You've heard of them?" she asked Angel. Buffy knew that there were many things that Angel hadn't told her about his life -- but she figured that his knowledge of the existence of seven feet tall weasels should have demanded at least a brief comment on his part. "Unfortunately," Angel said shortly. "Why is it that nobody ever seems happy to see a Pooka?" Elwood asked while sipping at his martini which didn't appear to have lessened in content at all since the moment Buffy had first seen the glass. "Because you're more annoying than Spike even on his worst days?" Angel snarled. Elwood brushed aside Angel's comment. "You vampires are just annoyed that you weren't admitted into UBEFSGTTP." "UBEFSGTTP?" Buffy echoed. 'Do I even *want* to know what he's talking about?" "United brotherhood of elves, fairies, spirits, gnomes, trolls, tokens and Pookas," Giles answered automatically, his attention focused on the room's two non-human occupants. "Now will one of you please tell us what it is that we're supposed to be worrying about!?" Angel spoke first. "Dru has the --" "Universal Amalgamator," Elwood finished. Xander looked from one creature to the other. "I'm guessing this isn't a good thing?" Giles' voice was strained when he answered. "Not at all." End Part 1 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: uzenet@videotron.ca Subject: BUFFYFIC: Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators (2/?) Date: 11 Nov 1998 01:20:51 -0500 Title: Vampires, Pookas, and Universal Amalgamators Author: Northlight email: uzenet@videotron.ca Summary: Dru's messing with reality, and Buffy and company team up with a strange ally in order to stop her. Disclaimer: Half of it is Joss', the Pooka and the Universal Amalgamator belongs to Marvel Comis -- the arc on which this story is based appeared in 'Generation X'. Author's Notes: It's been forever since I posted the first part, and I apologize for that (for anybody who cares, that is :). If you want to read the first part go to: *** "Universal what?!" Xander said blankly. Giles groaned and dropped down into a nearby seat. "The Universal Amalgamator -- one of the single most demented magical devices that has ever been seen." "Details would be nice," Buffy snapped, her nerves frayed. 'Dru, weasels, and demented magic-- just what we need!' Angel was pacing, his brow furrowed in concentration. The Universal Amalgamator was a difficult concept to grasp in even the best of times. "The Universal Amalgamator has the ability to 'join all sentient beings in all the universes into a single all-encompassing awareness." He couldn't help but shake his head at the utter stupidity of the entire notion of that damned Amalgamator. "So Drusilla wants to meld every dimension together?" Willow asked, wide eyed. Giles nodded. "That about sums it up, Willow." The Pooka, who had been calmly sipping at his martini during the question and answer period turned back to the conversation. "The Amalgamator is a nasty little device -- capable of bringing around the total destruction of the world as we know it." "So why would Drusilla want to use it?" Xander asked. "Wouldn't that mean that she'd loose out with the whole blood sucking thing?" "Dru may be a vampire -- but she also enjoys the thought of the end of the world," Angel explained. "It's a demon kind of thing." "That's a great bit of trivia," Buffy cut in, "but what are we going to do about stopping her?!" The room was silent for a long moment as each of them tried to think of the perfect plan to stop Dru from using the Universal Amalgamator. Any plan would have been nice, in fact. Finally, Elwood who had been traipsing across the library made his way back to his new companions. "Fortunately, there's a transdimensional portal in the sports section of this library," he informed the startled Giles. "A transdimensional portal?" Giles echoed, wide eyed. Then he shook his head, shaking off his questions. Stopping Dru from using the Amalgamator was far more important than indulging in his curiosity, at least for the moment. "Where to?" The weasel sipped at his martini before offering an answer. "It will drop us a short distance from the Citadel at the Edge of Reality, the home of the Universal Amalgamator." He gestured for them to follow him into the stacks. The Pooka glanced at the books through his rodent-like eyes and finally withdrew one titled 'The Rules and Regulations of the Game of Hockey'. He flipped through it with remarkable ease considering the size of his brown furred paws as Buffy and her friends watched with confusion. Elwood lay the book on the floor so that they could all see the large illustration of a hockey rink. "Step on in!" the weasel said, waving his arm towards the book. 'This book is a tradimensional portal?!' Buffy thought with disbelief. But after a quick rundown of that night's events, she decided that the location of the portal was no stranger than anything else that she'd seen. With a shrug, Buffy placed one high heeled foot onto the pages of the book. "It didn't wor--!" Buffy began before a bright golden light swirled up around her, sucking her through the pages. She shrieked in surprise as she was deposited none to gently into a snow bank. "It worked!" Buffy gasped, pulling herself out of the snow. She suddenly wished that she hadn't gone for the dress ensemble today. "...I just got sucked through a book!" Buffy looked around curiously. Other than the snow, the only thing that she could see was giant topiary animals and a train. "Strange much?" Buffy muttered as she cautiously examined her surroundings. With a cry, Angel, Giles, Xander and Willow tumbled into the same snowbank Buffy had recently vacated. Angel pulled himself out of the snow with an annoyed hiss and looked around. His eyes narrowed. "I don't like this place!" he growled. "It has a strange feel to it..." "Wow!" Xander gasped as he rolled our of the snow, and brushed it from his hair. "That definitely deserves a notch on the weirdness scale. Where did the weasel go, by the way?" "That... Pooka better not have left us here!" Angel said. "Don't worry, my dear vampire!" Elwood replied, popping out from the snow bank. His unexpected arrival sent Willow and Giles stumbling to their feet. "I'm here until the end!" Willow wrapped her arms around herself, shivering violently. "That's nice. But when do we get out of the cold?" Giles, whose usual tweed uniform was now earning him some degree of protection, second only to the furry weasel, was looking around curiously. "Perhaps we should try the train. Not only will it get us out of the snow, but it may provide useful in allowing us to catch up with Drusilla." "Exactly, my furless friend!" the Pooka exclaimed grandly, traipsing through the snow towards the stationary train and it's giant greenery guardians. With a slight shrug, Buffy followed in the Pooka's rather large footsteps. Inside the train, after a short session of stomping snow from impractical summer shoes, the strange company found themselves studying a list of potential destinations -- thoughtfully listed out and pinned to a wall. Buffy wrinkled her nose as she glared irritably at the list of stops. "Elsewhen, Nonesuch, Laputa, Neverhow, Avalon, Moria, C.O.T.U.A.," she shook her head in disbelief. "Who in the world comes up with these lame names?" "Nobody in your world," Elwood replied suavely, taking an impossibly delicate sip from his martini -- considering the giant snout dominating his face. Angel turned to scowl at the weasel, dislike for the new cryptic messenger shinning out from his narrowed eyes. Seeing the look of pure annoyance on her boyfriend's face, Buffy nudged him. Taking the hint, Angel abandoned his scathing reply for a more diplomatic turn of conversation. "What's C.O.T.U.A.?" he asked. Seeing the weasel-like smirk on Elwood's face, Angel had the sinking feeling that he'd just walked into an utterly obvious answer. "The Citadel of the Universal Amalgamator," Elwood replied, and Angel silently cursed as he realized it had indeed been an obvious answer. Willow's eyes brightened. "So that's where Drusilla's going! We have someplace to start." Giles slipped off his glasses and gave them a vigorous scrubbing as he deflated Willow's excitement. "Yes. But we still have no idea of how we shall stop Drusilla from accessing the Universal Amalgamator before she can meld all realities together." Xander grinned and thumped Giles on the back. "Don't worry about it, G-Man! We'll do the same thing we always do -- make it up as we go along and hope that we don't end up dead in the process." "Very reassuring, Xander!" Willow replied as the train let out a piercing whistle and lurched into motion. "Onwards we go!" the Pooka cried, grinning madly as he tossed back his drink. *** End Part 2 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Black Fire Subject: BUFFYFIC: Legacy of the Burgunds (1/?) Date: 11 Nov 1998 17:42:39 -0800 (PST) Title: Legacy of the Burgunds Author: Black Fire Email: blackfire42@yahoo.com Feedback: Please? Spoilers: This part continues right after the prologue, which happens after Faith, Hope and Trick. I need to see what happens with the next few episodes. For now, this is like a subplot to the current storyline. Disclaimers: I don't own any of the Buffy characters and I can't afford to. (Though, I wish I could, a least afford to.) Wolf and any other characters (I haven't even given them all names yet, how lame) are mine. Please do not use them without asking. Summary: This story is heavilly based in Germanic/Norse mythology, particularly, on the Saga of the Volsungs. Two of the greatest legends of the past have returned, bringing who-knows-what with them. For some reason, this didn't seem to have been sent out. I appologize to anyone who gets it twice. Legacy of the Burgunds Chapter 1 -- Troubling Dreams Giles was waiting by the door when Buffy got there. She didn't say a word, just walked into the watcher's apartment and started pacing. "What seems to be the trouble?" Giles asked, confused. "I don't know," Buffy said, still pacing. "I don't know. I was a sleep, well, of course I was asleep, and there was this huge explosion." "An explosion?" Giles asked. "I didn't hear anything." "Not out there," Buffy stopped and made a general sweeping gesture, indicating the outside world, then pointed to her head "in here," "Well, lots of times, people dream of exploding buildings, falling off cliffs and such," Giles explained. "I'm sure it's nothing to be worried about." "No, no, no," the slayer argued, "this wasn't anything like that. It was bigger, terrifying." "Terrifying, how?" the watcher asked. "Like something's coming," Buffy answered with a look of fear in her eyes, "something big. I'm talking end of the world type stuff, Giles." "I'm sure you're just over reacting," Giles replied, trying to maintain a level of calm in the room. "I don't think so," Buffy said, finally sitting down. She cradled her head in her hands and sighed, finally calming down. "Maybe you're right, though." "I'm sure I am," Giles replied gently. "Even so, I'll look through my books tomorrow, see if I can find anything that has to do with large explosions. In the meantime, though, why don't you go back home and get some more sleep. You'll feel better in the morning." "All right," Buffy sighed again. * * * * * No more dreams, such as that troubled her again. Giles was unable to find any plausible correlation's between the dream and any known prophecy. Eventually, as the weeks wore on, Buffy forgot about what she had seen, almost completely. == The Black Fire | Vote for me in the Site Fights!! Blackfire42@yahoo.com | http://www.thesitefights.com/sarina/nest2.htm http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shadowlands/4203 "But if they all forget me I will be here anyway, like an artifact of some lost civilization" -Vlad Dracula _The Dracula Tape_ "Don't worry. I'm not here to eat." -- Angel (IG) _________________________________________________________ DO YOU YAHOO!? Get your free @yahoo.com address at http://mail.yahoo.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: RCCOLA503@aol.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: In My Life Date: 15 Nov 1998 16:22:52 EST Title: In My Life Author: Meg R-C E-mail: RcCola503@aol.com Feedback: Pretty please with a cherry on top! Spoilers: Becoming Disclaimer: Buffy, and Angel, Willow,etc belong Joss Whedon and the WB. The song "In My Life" belongs to Lennon/McCartney. No copyright infringment intended. Summary: Angel is back from Hell after seven years and Buffy is preparing for her wedding to another man. But of all these friends and lovers There is no on compares with you And these memories lose their meaning When I think of love as something new Though I know I'll never lose affection For people and things that went before I know I'll often stop and think about them In my life I love you more ~Beatles On her dresser is a constant reminder that I am not the first. He is taller than me, handsomer than me, and he has his arms around her. She is leaning against his chest with an intimacy born from love, an intimacy she refuses to share with me. On the back is an inscription: "The Slayer and the Angel. One is home, where is the other? Willow". I had no idea what that meant, who this Willow was, or what the hell a Slayer was. I just assumed that "the Angel" was referring to Angela, but even that I didn't know for sure. Angela, she refused to speak of the picture to me. The first time I asked she grew cold, distant, and refused to speak, staring me the eyes as if daring me to ask again. I didn't. I couldn't. I loved her so much, I couldn't lose her when I was this close to having her. We would be wed in seven days, and after that she will tell me everything. She has too. I wanted to believe it, that once we were married she would grow to love me the way I love her, the way she used to, before the picture came. Ever since that day six months ago she has been distant, her touch has been cold. She seems to be waiting for something, and everyday it doesn't come, she closes off a little more In seven days it will be my wedding day. Every cell in my brain screams at me to marry Jeffrey, to forget Angel. Become Angela once and for all, shed the last remnants of Buffy Summers that exist. He never came for me, I can't wait forever. Jeff loves me, more than I deserve. I can't keep throwing away my life for Angel, I have to move on. The only problem is that I don't love Jeff, not in the way that I love Angel. I used to think that I did, I thought that when I accepted his proposal, I thought that through the two years of courtship prior to the proposal, and for three months afterward. But then that damn picture came in the mail. Why couldn't Sunnydale and everyone in it just remain a memory? Why couldn't all the memories stay where they had been hidden for seven years: in the deepest, darkest corner of my mind, under lock and key? But that picture forced me to remember what I would rather forget: everything about my past, about Buffy Summers, her stupid sacred duty, and her stupid love. The message is what got to me the most. Angel was back, back from Hell, where I sentenced his soul to eternity. Eternity that lasted seven years. And now he was back. But I refused to go back just the same. I was terrified, I'll admit it. Terrified of going back full of hope, only to be squashed by a "We can never be together" speech. I couldn't handle the rejection again, I need to be loved. Jeff loves me, if Angel did he would come after me, and not let me marry someone else. He has seven days to come to me, to tell me that we can be together as long as I live. Unless he does I will banish Buffy Summers and cursed memories to the darkness that lurks in my heart, and I will become 110% Angela damon, married woman and clueless to what lurks in the night. I prayed that he would come. "If anyone has any reason that these two shall not be wed. Speak now, or forever hold your peace." Angela stood beside me more beautiful than I had ever seen her few strands to frame her face. She was clad in a white satin gown my sister Marian had helped her choose, she had no family that she spoke of, or that was present. I loved her so much, with every core of my being. Finally she would be mine, and I would legally be hers, although, truly she had owned me since the moment we first met. She stirred beside me, and I felt her turn her head and look beyond me and down the isle. Turning my heart sank as a group of six people filed into the last row. But their arrival as a whole was not what caused my impending sense of doom, but a single member of the group, him. The man from the photograph, although he didn't seem to have aged a day since it was taken. He was only one that did not sit, standing at the end of the row. And then he smiled at her, my Angela. "Angel," I heard her whisper beside me, startled I glance at her. Every part of her being radiated love, and warmth, all directed towards him. She moved towards him, and in my shocked state I did nothing to stop her. Angel. He was here, he had come. So had Willow and Oz and Xander and Cordelia and Giles. They were all here, they had come for me at last. I felt my feet move towards him, I felt Jeff's shock as they did. But he didn't stop me, he loved me to much to hold me back. I think that even he realized what Angel and I had always refused to believe, but secretly hoped: we were destined to be together. I don't remember how I got there, the moments are all a blur. I was in Angel's arms, for the first time in eight years. For the first time since that fateful morning when he died and Angelus broke free. "I'm so sorry," I murmured. "I'm sorry it took me so long," He replied. "I love you." "I love you too Buffy." And our lips met in a kiss to end all kisses, and for the first time in nine years I was happy just to be where I was, I was where I belonged. In Angel's arms, in his warm embrace of love, with his lips connected to mine. I watched him kiss her, and her kiss him. Every cell in my body screamed for me to do something, not to let her slip away. But I knew that she was already gone, that she had never really been there to begin with. They kissed, and then she fell, and he disintegrated. He disintegrated! His body turned to ashes, which covered her fallen body like a blanket. The entire congregation, all but those remaining five that had come in with him, whose name I now knew to be Angel, gasped as her body fell and his disappeared. Epilogue (Willow's POV) Officially Buffy died of a brain tumor, and Angel never existed. Buffy was twenty- six when she died, the only Slayer to live past the age of nineteen. We all knew it would happen. Angel was living on borrowed time, released from Hell by a God who only allowed him long enough to set right what his demon had wronged. Buffy was his last penance, all else had been righted. It seemed that in the 251 years that he lived Angel amassed quite a large fortune, which was promptly spread about to all the families of all of Angelus's victims. Unbeknownst to us at the time, he also left a rather hefty fortune to each of the Slayerettes, so that we "may once again regain the lives that you all lost so many years ago". Once all was righted with Buffy, once true love was reunited, he had fulfilled all henhad returned for. He had no more time on this earth. Which is why it took him so long to go after Buffy. He was reluctant, to say the least, to tell her how much he loved her, to have her place her love in him again, only to leave her, and break her heart. It wasn't until we learned of her condition that he finally agreed, plus with her upcoming nuptials he had no choice. Buffy's condition, the one stumped the doctors more than they'd like to admit. According to Jeff Hinder, Buffy, or Angela as he called her, had never exhibited any signs of illness or fatigue, and no previous neurological exams had turned up any evidence of a tumor. What they didn't know was that it was physically impossible for a Slayer to live past her twenty-seventh birthday, Buffy's wedding day. Jeff said that he had no idea why Angela/Buffy had insisted on that particular date for their wedding, and that he had never questioned her about it. I know that she was giving Angel one last chance to start where they left off, on the very anniversary of the day they were torn apart. With that reuniting kiss Buffy stopped fighting her body, trusting in Angel to see her through. And he did, and now they're in heaven, forever together. At last. Fin ~Please send feedback. I'm not sure if it makes sense, I tried to explain everything in the epilogue but I'm not sure if I did a good job at it. So feedback, please! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: sasheer@mailexcite.com Subject: BUFFYFIC: Moving On Date: 15 Nov 1998 14:21:15 PST Author's Note: This story takes place during the upcoming 1999 series ‘Angel'. According to this story the kiss between Willow and Xander in Homecoming never happened. Spoilers: Anything before Homecoming could be spoilers. Also I have no idea what is really going to happen in the series ‘Angel' so this is not "what's going to happen". Feedback: Please! Sasheer@mailexcite.com Disclaimer: All the characters belong to Joss and Mutant Enemy. Blah blah blah don't sue me. The quotes throughout the piece are from the song How? off Lisa Loeb's Firecracker CD. ***The << >> represent song quotes. <> Cordelia Chase had gone home to Sunnydale, California for the weekend. She hadn't been there in a little over a month. Before that she had returned almost every weekend and if she hadn't gone there then he had come to visit her. But it had been a full month since they had seen each other. Maybe it had to do with their last fight. The fight Cordelia could not even remember what it had been over. But it had been big. They hadn't broken up. Why would they after putting up with each other for almost two years? When she first arrived she had run into Buffy Summers, who immediately asked about Angel. Cordelia gave an irritated sigh, "He's . . . Angel. The same annoying Vampire that is always around with bad news." Angel lived near Cordelia's Los Angeles college. They saw a lot of each other no matter how much Cordelia couldn't stand him. Most of the time when they were together they argued. She had thought her and Xander were complete opposites attract but Angel was so completely different from her. And to make things worse all of her sorority sisters loved him. They drooled and acted like love sick school kids whenever he came around. They couldn't understand why Cordelia didn't dump her boyfriend back home that she always fought with to be with Angel. Buffy smiled a knowing smile, "Sounds the same to me. I should come visit you guys soon." "You know you are always welcome." Cordelia waved knowingly. Buffy had been to visit a few times and had actually hit it off pretty well with the other girls in the sorority. Cordelia and Buffy got along a lot better too. They actually agreed on a lot of things and had fun when they hung out. "So I guess you want to go see Xander." Cordelia glanced over at Buffy as they headed into the Bronze doors, "Has he said anything?" Buffy shook her head, "All I know is what you told me. Big fight. Haven't talked in a month." Buffy stopped and put her hand around Cordelia's forearm, "Cordy, he's been . . ." Buffy stopped and bit the inside of her cheek. "What?" Cordelia asked, not sure what Buffy was getting at. Buffy shook her head and turned away, "Nothing. He should be here." The Bronze was the same as it had been when they had gone to High School. Normally Cordelia would not have been caught dead in here after graduating but in Sunnydale there was nothing else to do and Xander was here and he was the reason she was in town. Cordelia saw him before he saw her. He was on the dance floor, dancing to a slow song with her. Willow Rosenberg. Willow went to a school only twenty miles away so it was easier for her to come back home all of the time. And it seemed her and Xander had grown closer since the move. That was what their last fight had been about. Cordelia had asked him to come visit her the weekend of the Sorority/Fraternity dance. But Willow had beat her to it. Her own Sorority having a dance the same night. "You're my boyfriend not hers, Alexander Harris!" Cordelia had screeched, near tears. She had been hysterical, not understanding. Jealous would be the right word for it. He was confused at her anger. He didn't understand where it came from. He never did. When Cordelia had talked to Buffy about it, Buffy had understood completely why Cordelia had been so . . . jealous. But Cordelia didn't need Buffy to understand she had needed Xander to. "It hurts to see them like that." Cordelia whispered. Buffy glanced at her with sad eyes but didn't reply. "But you know why it hurts so much? Cause they look like they belong together. And ever since we first started going out she was the only one I was scared of taking him away from me. I knew he had a thing for you but I always knew it would never be returned, not the way he wanted it. I knew your heart was somewhere else. But with her . . ." Cordelia pointed to them and turned to Buffy, "I knew that eventually the dumbass would open his eyes and see how wonderful she is." Buffy didn't know what to say. She knew too much as it was. "Hey Buffy. Cordelia, I didn't know you were coming into town this weekend?" Cordelia turned to smile at Willow, "Yeah, last minute decision. Angel really pissed me off and I had to get away from him." Buffy laughed, "He's good at that." Cordelia looked over Willow's head to see Xander standing behind her. He was watching Cordelia, weary, not sure on how to approach her. Cordelia smiled weakly at him and he carefully walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek, "Long time no talk." he whispered. She nodded not sure why there were tears in her eyes. She turned away and nodded at Buffy, "You need to come visit and get whatever is up Angel's ass out of there. I am growing sick of him. And god my Sorority sisters, they won't leave me alone about him." "Is he seeing anyone?" Buffy wearily asked. Cordelia threw her head back and laughed, "Angel? Mr. I'm-a-Vampire-with-a-soul-so-I'm-not-good-enough-for-anyone. Or is it no-one-is-good-enough-for-me?" Buffy smiled relieved but sad. * * Cordelia and Xander were finally alone. And filled with silence, both were weary on what to say. Cordelia figured it was because of the fight over a month ago. "Look, Xander, this is stupid . . ." "Cordelia I need to tell you something . . ." They both stopped and smiled at each other. At least the silence was broken. Cordelia scooted closer to him on the couch and gently touched his hand, "I'm sorry I got so jealous." Xander turned his hand over and laced their fingers together, he took his other hand and softly traced her hand in his, "I think we should break up Cordy." Cordelia's heart stopped and tears immediately sprang to her eyes. She jerked her hand away from his and his eyes rose to meet hers. She turned away from him to hide her pain that was surely written all over her face, "What? Because of that stupid fight." "That. And . . ." "I said I was sorry Xander. What else do you want me to say? I was jealous, and I think I had every right to be." "And you did have every right to be. I get jealous every time you talk about Angel or any other guy for that matter back in Los Angeles." Cordelia turned back to him, "But I never even thought of them in any other way other then as friends. I didn't go to any dances with them." "Willow is my best friend." "And I know that. But why do . . .why do you want to break up?" Cordelia questioned. She felt like her heart was already breaking. Xander had been the first guy she had let in on her. He had been the first guy that she had let herself go with. She had let herself fall in love with and he had changed her. For the better. Made her open her eyes and see the world for what it was. He had cared for her. "Because." He stopped and took her hand back into his, "God this is so hard for me." "Oh gee and I assume it's easy for me to hear this?" Cordelia snapped. Her defenses were fastly forming to protect herself. Her heart. He sighed, "We are so different from each other." "Duh. But I thought we had worked through this two years ago." "Look Cordy, Willow and I. We're . . . together now." Cordelia jerked her hand back and stood up, moving away from him. Her chest felt like it was on fire, her breathing weak. "Oh." Was all she could manage to say. Xander's eyes softened which seemed to only anger her. He stood up and started for her, "Cordy, I'm sorry . . ." "No. You know maybe you're right. No. You are right. My Sorority sisters were all right. Angel was right. Buffy was right. God, why am I so blind? Everyone told me you were not worth my time and I didn't listen to any of them because I thought that what we had was special. I thought we loved each other." Her words were full of anger and spite. "We were. Are. Cordy I loved you and I still do, very much. But . . . it's not like what it used to be." "Yeah well . . . I hope you and Willow have a happy life together. Good-bye Alexander Harris. The last two years were a waste of my time and the worst mistake I have ever made." She turned and started for the door to his apartment. He stopped her just as she stepped out, "Cordelia, don't end it like this. I care for you and want to remain friends. We have all been through so much together." Cordelia turned to face him no longer hurt, just angry, "All that we have done together and been through together means nothing to me. Never has and never will." He actually looked hurt. But Cordelia didn't see nor care. She turned on her heal leaving him and Sunnydale for good. She intended to never return again. <> * * * <> "Cordy, Angel's here." Cordelia groaned as she sat up in her bed. She swung her legs over to the side, stood up and headed to the bedroom door. She opened it to see Angel standing there with Kindy standing two feet behind him practically drooling. Cordelia offered a fake smile at Angel and let him into her room and started to shut the door on Kindy, "Thanks Kindy, I can take it from here." Kind leaned forward and whispered, "Now that Xander is out of the picture you and Angel can really hit it off." Cordelia rolled her eyes and shut the door in Kindy's face, "God." She mumbled before turning to see Angel standing right behind her. "So what do I owe this honor of you visiting me? Is there great danger in L.A.? Or wait I know some of your cousins have come to visit and we're on the menu?" Angel laughed and Cordelia's eyes widened, "I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before." Angel continued to smile, "It's just, Buffy said the same thing to me once. You guys are a lot alike." Cordelia let herself smile and offered a chair to Angel as she sat on the edge of her bed, "So, really, what's up?" "Buffy called and told me what happened. She wanted me to check up on you." Cordelia rolled her eyes, "Great. Now you're being Mr. . . well I can't think of a good cut down so I'll not say anything." Angel smiled again, "You seem to be okay." Cordelia waved her hand, "Yeah well. What am I supposed to do sit around and mope about him? He's not worth the pain." "You loved him." Cordelia's eyes narrowed and she turned her face to look out the window, "So? It doesn't mean anything." Angel stood up and sat beside her on the bed, "Yeah it does. It means everything. Love isn't something that just dies because the guy is a fool and says it's over." Cordelia felt the tears coming again. She had cried a lot since returning from Sunnydale but she had been able to hide her pain and tears from everybody. Including Buffy who had made a short day trip the day after Cordelia had left Sunnydale. Angel lightly touched her shoulder, "Cordy, you need to let go before you can truly heal." Cordelia jumped away from his touch. He had never touched her like that, in fact he had never tried to comfort her. They had spent most of the past year together fighting off evil forces that slipped past Sunnydale, but even if she got hurt badly the most he would do is help her bandage the wound up. Then they would argue over something. No matter how hard she had tried, her and Angel had never been able to get along. "I think you should leave." Cordelia said her back to him. The tears were falling and she felt embarrassed. "Cordelia, don't be scared to cry or feel. You are such a brave human when it comes to facing all the evil forces out there. It's okay to let go every now and then. It's normal." Cordelia whirled around, "Not for me. I don't like caring. I don't like being so helpless, but I am here. I am the loser and I have never been the loser before." The tears fell harder as her face fell. She couldn't feel the anger anymore. Just the pain. Angel stood up and took her into his arms. She hid her face in his chest, welcoming the comfort of his strong arms. Softly Angel rubbed his hands in circles around her back, gently massaging all the tension. It felt weird to be comforting Cordelia. She was always the strong one, she had such a backbone to her that Angel thought she never broke down. He would have thought she never cared for anyone also but anytime Xander would visit and Angel would see the two of them together, he knew that if she didn't care for anyone else she at least cared for Xander. Angel knew how much Cordelia loved Xander and that was without her ever saying it. He knew by just watching. "Why does it hurt so much when all I want to do is hate him?" Cordelia mumbled. "If you love someone it can't just go away with words." She lifted her face to look at his. Angel brought his hands around to cup her face and gently whipped the tears with his thumbs, "Give it time, it's the only thing that will ease the pain." "What if it never goes away?" Angel was surprised at how young and vulnerable she looked at the moment. As if she were once again a young child that had been hurt by a bully or had been chastened by her father. "It will Cordy. In time." "You promise?" She asked. As if his promise would fix everything. As if he promised then she knew that soon it would all be better. Angel brought his hands to her hair and softly ran his fingers through it, "I promise." She brought her face back to his chest as the tears slowed. Angel pulled away after a few moments, "I better go." "Yeah