All I Ever Needed to Know
I Learned from Watching TP...

  • American customs officials are blind, British customs officials are deaf. (Pilot)
  • People actually go to tours of big corporation buildings. (Monsoon Man)
  • If a person is either a reclusive scientist or rich and mean, you know they're probably the bad guy. (Pilot, Culex Experiment, Monsoon Man, The Rameses Connection)
  • Don't give out your home address to a badly acting, skinny, balding guy who looks like an extra from "Goodfellas." (Monsoon Man)
  • Drink your fruit juice. (Pilot)
  • If your mother wants you to do something that you know is patently pointless, humiliating, and involves clothing you hate, say NO! (Pilot)
  • Always have money with you when ripping off someone's Rollerblades. (Rameses Connection)
  • Not all dogs follow Lassie's example perfectly. (Living Stones)
  • Be sure to have a strong can of insect repellent when you take a detour into the woods. (Culex Experiment)
  • Use telepathy whenever possible. (every ep they forget to in the bad guys' lair)
  • Don't forget earplugs! (Culex)
  • All bad guys are inherently blind and deaf, so it's OK to talk or hide in an obvious place.
  • All bad guys are mad scientists or have scientists working under them (all of 'em!)
  • If you see a strange bug flying towards your face, and it "smells evil" the best thing to do is teleport. (Culex Experiment)
  • If you like Byron Lucifer, and decide to go to one of his concerts, watch out for pods. (Living Stones)
  • If you are given a disk of vital importance to the usage to something that shouldn't be used, put it on the Space Ship! Don't give it to the DSI! (Living Stones)
  • If you admit to turning in the same essay twice, your friend will have visions of Teleporting people. (Origin Story)
  • If you go to your friend's house and the people there say that they've never heard of your friend, consider that, chances are, they're lying. (Monsoon Man)
  • If you mother starts closing the curtains, wearing sunglasses, and acting all around strangely, it might be a good idea to check up on an alien invasion. (Living Stones)
  • Make sure to check what's lying on the couch before sitting down (Monsoon Man)
  • Don't climb on top of mobile buses (Origin Story)
  • Pay close attention to all music videos (Living Stones)
  • You can smell terror. Especially if you're a mad scientist obsessed with mosquitos.
  • If you are compleatly stuck in an inescapable predicament, eat breakfast. (Monsoon Man)
  • Beware of what your dog might bring in from outside (Living Stones)
  • Never tell the people that are kidnapping you that you are telepathic (Origin Story)
  • Watch yourself while playing laser tag (Culex Experiment)
  • Never assume there's no one in the boiler room (Living Stones)
  • Practice catching spontaniously falling objects. (Culex Experiment)